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© John Kernick

Healthy Monday: A Spanish tortilla is like a frittata. Chef Francis Mallmann makes a healthy, spring version with yogurt, fresh mint and sweet peas, baked in an oven until just set. It’s delicious served warm or at room temperature.

The best deodorant you will ever use Seriously. ¼ teaspoon in each pit and you can sweat your ass off, totally stink-free for like 2 full days. It’s a natural anti-bacterial so those little fuckers won’t multiply and make you smell. Plus it’s cheaper and healthier than any deod you can buy anywhere.

Use equal parts of the following:

-corn starch -baking soda -coconut oil -cocoa butter

With a few drops of whatever essential oil you want, for fragrance. Otherwise it basically just smells like nothing. I use tea tree oil & pine needle oil. Cuz they’re MANLY.

Get these plants for your poorly ventilated apartment

Drink water! The less hydrated you are, the worse the pain will be.

Eat bananas! Cramping can be caused by a potassium deficiency and bananas have lots of potassium!

Avoid salt! Extra sodium can make your cramps worse.

Apply heat!! There are many ways to do this: hot water bottle, pour dry corn, beans, or rice into a sock and microwave it for 15 seconds, icy hot/bengay (use caution), or just a heating pad. This will relax the muscles in your abdomen and ease cramping.

Masturbate! Orgasms relax the muscles and ease cramping.

Exercise! Keeping your body moving is a great way to both get your mind off the pain and ease the pain.

Raw honey as a wash-off face mask really will give you otherworldly smooth skin. This requires REAL honey though, not the stuff in the plastic bear bottle. Go to Whole Foods or the farmer’s market or your local apiary and get some raw all-natural honey for this

Rosehip oil is a life changer. I use it twice a day, 3-5 drops, massaged FIRMLY into the skin (if you just let it sit on top you’ll be orange). 

Same token: apply an AHA or BHA toner (Stridex pads in the red/blue boxes are popular), let them sit for maybe 15 minutes, then do your rosehip oil massage. You will get SO MUCH GUNK out of your pores. It’s truly disgusting and satisfying.

Double cleansing/oil cleansing will also change your life. I use jojoba oil to remove my makeup and the gunk from the day, then a foaming cleanser to really get my skin clean. If you’re afraid of putting oil on your skin, don’t be: jojoba is very close to the natural oil your face produces, so it does, in a sense, actually “trick” your sebum production into thinking it’s already done its job, leaving you with moisturized but not OILY skin.

You want to use a cleanser that is as low-pH as possible so that it closely mimics your skin’s natural level of acidity. Hada Lobo Foaming Cleanser is my favorite and it’s really cheap.

Never ever ever use baking soda, cinnamon, or lemon on your skin. They will give you chemical burns, no joke. Don’t fuck with them.

Use sunscreen every god damn day. “But I don’t get sunburned!” You still get sun DAMAGE, though. “But I hate how sunscreen looks/feels on my skin!” European and East Asian companies have you covered. Seriously, wear sunscreen. Every day. 

More determination

More persistence

Less overeating

Drinking more water

Eating more fruits and vegetables

Cutting down on “bad” carbs

Cutting down on refined fats and sugars

More active

Positive change in mood and behavior

Vegan Vegetable Chip Round Up

Microwave Potato Chips (GF)

Baked Sweet Potato Chips

Cheezy Spicy Kale Chips

Crispy Baked Carrot Chips 2 Ways

Crispy Baked Beet Chips (GF/SF)

Baked Celeriac Chips

Spicy Lime Jicama Chips (raw)

Baked Zucchini Chips