I will lie, cheat, and scam if it means getting out of a conversation I don't wanna be in. My sense of ethical behavior vanishes entirely when I want ppl to stop talking to me. One time I pretended not to know what Egypt was so they'd stop talking to me about their vacation plans

mostly my career goals are to hang out with friends and do whatever is funniest in the moment. hope that helps

I think I deserve to be flirted with. Just a lil bit. Wooed, courted, maybe even romanced? Is it fair that no one's sweeping me off my feet right now?? I don't think so.

it’s so rude when someone doesn’t feel you yearning deeply for them… bestie how much more brain waves do i have to fire at u

Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions

I’m gonna scream is2g

I was thinking of reblogging this again just because the original video is still amazing, but then I see the second video and lost my mind. The upgraded fan, the body glitter, the sheer fact that he got to do this with the actual singer.

we can have a little gay as in happy, as a treat

This is what hozier meant when he says he falls a little bit in love everyday with someone new

I once watched a girl in the produce aisle pick up a bushel of bananas that were precariously perched on the edge and move them farther back and under her breath she said “there you go sweeties - that will be more comfortable” before shuffling off and… I think about her often.

« Silent lovers » is such a sweet way to put it.

I was driving on the highway and passed a dude absolutely JAMMING alone in his car, doing those little half dance moves you do when you’re stuck sitting down in a small space, bellowing unheard lyrics at the top of his lungs, and my instant reaction was to think “I love you.” And then to pray he had a good day, or whatever, because those fleeting moments of connection are so incredible.

idea: scene with two characters eagerly stripping each other clearly about to bone, but they keep getting interrupted by finding carefully concealed weapons in each other’s clothing, so they keep just unholstering, revealing and unstrapping increasingly ludicrous amounts of hidden guns and knives as the clothes come off, and it’s lowkey killing the mood a little

Alternatively: it's not killing the mood at all but it's totally making both of them giggle like they're twelve and possibly get lowkey competitive in a subconscious way about who has the most to drop.

...Oh

It’s not that there’s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink that makes it awkward so much as that there’s so many weapons hidden underneath the sink that they fall out of the cabinet with the unmistakable sound of a knife-alanche, and then the other person comes in like “I can explain!” and you’re just dead-ass standing there with your own armload of weapons like “I can also explain.”

a home-cooked meal with you as we talk about our day and unwind and relax into each other