i want to preface this by saying that this is NOT a hater post because i love marisha and i have very much enjoyed murray as a character she is badass and cool and a fascinating take on a wizard.
that said! i am fascinated by the way that murray seems a little blind to struggles that aren’t in line with her own until she’s directly and pretty aggressively confronted with them.
we get to see this first with occtis, and how she sees his name and knows his house and immediately assumes that he’s just like the rest of them. she doesn’t see the implication of a child of a sundered house having to resort to studying wizardry when he should have all manner of magic at his fingertips without a lick of effort by his birthright. she doesn’t see the truth of his situation, doesn’t look for it at all, until occtis is dead at her feet, murdered by his own family.
on the other hand, there’s demodus, who has the same struggle as her in her eyes, of not being taken seriously with the talent he’s studied to cultivate, and working for the funding and freedom to continue studying as murray has fought for continued funding and freedom for her school
and then there’s azune, who she’s taught same as demodus, and who has struggled on his own the same as demodus and she have. but his struggle ends with him aiming to be useful, it’s ended with him in a position of power (as much as being a magic cop under the thumb of a noble who has said azune should be afraid of him is holding some power), and murray doesn’t seem to see how hard that is for him, even when he says in no uncertain terms to her that he worries she hates him for his position in a corrupt system. it’s not until he’s devolving into a gasping panic in front of her begging for her help and saying he’s scared and can’t do this anymore that she sees that he’s truly, severely struggling with the burden he’s under.
and even then, she tells him he’s a boy scout, and one of the good ones, and that he has to keep going he has no choice. in the same breath that she’s telling him that demodus, who is only maybe 4 ot 5 years younger than him, is too young and innocent to risk, she’s telling azune that he is worth risking for the cause and he has to buck up and get over it. he has made his bed and must lie in it.
which is true, he has made this bed for himself, but only because he’s been living in this level of isolation where he only interacts with what passes for his support system when thjazi needs something from him, to the point where even thimble doesn’t know where he lives or if he has anything to go home to.
but that’s not a struggle murray understands and so her view skates right over it until she’s confronted with it, and even then it’s dismissed because there is a job to do and even though she sees that azune is struggling, it can’t matter right now and even if it did, murray can’t see the heart of the struggle or the impact it’s having on him because she can’t see herself in it or relate to it and so it’s like her vision skates over it to the point where she is getting suspicious or skeptical or paranoid of azune and his actions or motives. which is a fascinating character choice for marisha to make for murray and i really want to see what the pay off is gonna be eventually when she has to confront these struggles she’s been a little blind to.
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