It Happens

For this game of dodgeball, I will be specifically targeting the gayest and most autistic among you to eliminate. 

Okay so normal rules then

Sober as fuck at the back of the club going onto Wikipedia and typing "List of birds"

kinda crazy how like every cult documentary is like "here's the survivors we spoke to who all have a range of different experiences, beliefs, talents, skills and stories" and all the survivors of the cult are like "i consider myself a rational person and this initially gave me a sense of community and was offering me the one thing i needed, it was a wonderful experience at first and i was surrounded by people i loved and who loved me, and by the time i realised how bad things had gotten i was in too deep and had alienated all my friends and family outside of the group and had been brainwashed over a period of time to think that any suffering was deserved and that by leaving i would be causing harm to myself and everyone i knew, and if things had been good once then maybe they would be again, and i had to believe that because i had nothing else left" and then half the reviews are people talking about how stupid cult survivors are and how they would NEVER be so dumb to join a group like this, clearly these idiots KNOWINGLY joined a cult and therefore deserved everything that happened to them, maybe if they had tried been as smart and rational as me,

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

Need to be taken apart and reassembled like a broken watch . Not in a sex way I just think they should put my joints together right this time

One of my FAVOURITE ship dynamics to write or read in fics is when two characters are basically already a couple but they just haven't realised it yet. They call each other up at like 3am, they cuddle, they sleep in the same bed, they fall asleep in each other's arms, they hold hands, they practically live together, they talk about having a ~ special connection ~, they just haven't actually kissed or done the do or talked about their feelings yet so they're still both like "but I just don't know if they like me in that way!!"

Less slow burn and more two idiots standing around literally on fire from page one but not noticing until page two hundred.

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

wore a white dress and walked in the rain to the barracks so all the knights could see my skin peeking through the fabric and i said “oh my, excuse me ladies, it seems i got myself lost in the downpour… i’m all alone and no one even knows i’m here…” and they just gave me warm clothes and made me soup so i didn’t catch a cold and escorted me back to my room. i fucking hate chivalry

if you set off a rube goldberg type death trap to kill someone, if it's a long enough machine, it ceases to become your fault if somebody dies at the end. that's how I've gotten away with it all these years, and why I'm still going to heaven.