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all frogs have halos they’re just not visible to the human eye

Why is the x files so….. dark. Like, visually. 90% of the episodes are at night, I can’t see shit!

Why is this the type of humor I enjoy

who did this

I am broken as a person and I don’t even care

are you gonna pick those penne noodles out of the boiling water one by one like a man, or are you gonna use a strainer like some kind of democrat?

mothman is real and he offered me cocaine in a dimly lit jc penny’s

me after a quiet day in: Time for a quiet night in

yall ever serve urself an appropriate amount of spaghetti and are full after eating the set amount of spaghetti and consciously know that u have eaten all the spaghetti u needed but also. u know that there is More spaghetti in the kitchen. so u go and get urself more spaghetti and spend the rest of the night feeling like u ate 30 bricks cursing urself for eating so much spaghetti

Extremely specific, but also extremely relatable.

this is literally so funny and is also me whenever i feel i’ve been Wronged

I slept in and laughed way too much at this

THE NOISESSSSS LMFAOOOOOOOO

this is the biggest plot twist of our generation

I thought there was no way he could come out of that looking like a winner and he proved me wrong so hard

all i want is a flat chest and some fangs

Ppl without ADHD be like “oh if I get rid of all possible distractions then you’ll be forced to focus on the boring task!” Fool… You underestimate my Power