Everheardofaboondoggle

Dick doesn't like Damian's new cat, or everyone thinks it's a cat, at least. It's kinda big for the size of a regular house cat, and it's whole body is like a weird trippy illusion; black with blue eyes one moment, white with green the next.

Damian claims he just picked it up off the street, and he's overall utterly unperturbed with the cat. According to him the thing was probably some sort of escaped lab experiment, and he is determined to figure out who was testing so inhumanely on animals. May God have mercy on their souls when that boy reaches them.

No one in the family quite likes the cat, except Damian, obviously.

The animal just has a way of sneaking into where it's not supposed to. It's always watching. Always just around the corner. Always at the exact place you don't want it to be at that exact moment.

Tim in particular is very annoyed by the cat. He likes to sit on Tim's paperwork, press buttons on his computer, and stick his face in Tim's coffee. The cat actively makes Tim's life harder whenever it gets the chance. Damian finds this to be the best form of comedy, because he is a little menace(lovingly).

Dick thinks he has it the worst with the cat overall though. Why? Because no one believes him about this stupid animal. Sure, they all agree that the cat is fucking weird, at the very least it's more sapient than a cat should be, but that's as far as they take it.

Not Dick.

Dick managed to sneak up on it once, and only once, and has never even attempted again. He just wanted to get back at the creature after it spent all day tripping him as he walked down the halls. It was harmless! Honestly, he just expected the cat to jump, maybe hiss, and skitter away for the rest of the day.

Instead the cat whirled around and opened its jaw so wide Dick swears its chin began to grace the floor, and then glowing green tentacles came out! They latched around his arms, covered his nose and mouth, and began to pull him into the tooth filled abyss of its jaws.

He felt the life in him leave before he was even half way pulled in. The fight slowly began to drain out of him, and the room was getting so so cold. Dick really thought this was how he was going to die, via his baby brother's freaky ass cat.

And then Damian's voice rang out, sharp and firm, simply calling the name of his cat lovingly dubbed "Phantom". The name Dick gave him, actually, because the cat travelled around the house like a ghost. Damian is the one who decided the name ghost was too childish, and thus, Phantom came about.

Damian arrived to him laying on the floor, Phantom on top of his chest purring away, as if the thing didn't try to consume him mere moments ago.

"Lying on the floor is quite unbecoming of you, Richard. However, since you are bonding with Phantom, I will let it slide."

And then Damian picked up the cat, tucked it into his chest, and walked back to where he came from.

When talking to Damian about the event later, he just looked at him like he was stupid. Tim said the cameras had shorted out (something that had been happening a lot recently), and he had no clue what Dick was talking about. Bruce and Alfred both advised him to seek mental help, believing him to be stress hallucinating. He didn't even bother telling the others.

So yeah, Dick doesn't like Damian's cat monster. He doesn't want to hurt his baby brother's feelings, but it can't stay.

Tim does not like Damian's new cat.

Hates it, actually.

Under normal circumstances Tim wouldn't give less of a shit about Damian's zoo of animals living in the house, but this one in particular just really like to fuck with Tim for some reason.

He's heard that cats can take on the personality of the owners, but this really is too much.

It's not like it started off like this either. Tim and Damian's weird ass cat were cool. Best friends, even. They had a symbiotic relationship.

Needless to say, Duke does not like Damian's "cat".

Because let's make one thing clear, that thing is not a cat. Not even close.

Sure it mimics one pretty well, but the size of its body isn't proportionate to a regular house cat. Its legs are too long, its body well- it fluctuates. A lot, actually. Sometimes it's wider, sometimes rounder, sometimes sharper, but not enough for Duke to really prove. He's only noticed because he stares so hard at the "cat" when they're in the same room.

Next

I redesigned my Spidersona in honour of the BND coming out. They are also the character I’d like to get attacked the most on Artfight (but feel free to attack anyone >:)

Get it?? Because she was like “why is he wearing his underwear on the outside??

I drew this before the movie came out so if this actually happens in the movie I'm a genius

KOSA is a censorship bill that won’t make kids safe. Instead, it'll put all internet users at risk, especially youth. If you believe in a free and open internet, tell your lawmakers to reject #KOSA! https://stopkosa.com/

PLEASE SIGN THIS IF YOU CAN!

Tagging my moots because this is important: @ruinationz and @turbotasticnumberone and @cartoon-cat7241 and @seleyaaaa and @sssanga and @strayfelinez and @yukihirop and @rivertheemoo and @meatmedallion and @drownedsilverforever and @senpaipaws and @cartoonlover999 and @byronicmoron and @crowtheorie and @human-n0-l0ng3r and @rotibakarstuff and @glooberousgoon and @goddess-of-lov3 and @lucifersdog-luci and @aoihibiki247 and @klyju and @ace-productions7 and @fiberopticemoweeb666 and @cryptedlullaby and @3veryth1ngstays and @blossomletters and @sapphicavocado and @bloodybigirland @yanderehiro and @dnplicoricenutttt and @2catnip4me and @miracle-winkel and @mickyx-x and @biblicallyunhingedtheo and @the-only-good-ai and @prettirei and @unhinged-pink-espresso and @patchofglass and @m0nstrsk8bri and @ghostie-bunni and @nocthour and @ohthisisanna and @evergardenwall and @ladylrbloom and @themermaidavenger and @the-eclipse-is-in-me and @fannishwitch and @sleepyblogthingand @spookysimsspookythings and @sherotopia and @thekittykiller and @kindlykittie and @goldensnowspiderand @sulmii and @abeelarts and @talapride and @anneswritingnook and @funkydeathmdnss and @taliasims5 and @ieatrocks0912 and @rei-ayasaki and @jaq-of-hearts and @higuysetc and @thef-150 and @scaliedog and @everheardofaboondoggle and @dianaforever and @candy-floss-consumer and @zrofor09 and @writer-fennec and @harthue and @velvet-ruin and @hvybrth and @nights-like-this17 and @stilesispackmomof-thehalepack and @sapphicluma and @avery-is-sleepy and @aphexpuppy-x0x and @quietlychaotic13 and @rin-rineya and @secreteldritchhorror and @ladykillerzsstuff and @cruvlllsworld and @the-only-good-ai and @c1el-phantomh1ve and @striving4mikey and @yukihirop-is-prussia and @deadmegime and @miraculousadrienettemarichat and @agra-absurdis and @kopickoncave and @billy-bob-xiv and @foxunikilo and @nightmarezs and @leafgreen222 and @marshme110w and @niyahbabes and @marshme110w and @allie-ever-posting and @xd3ardiaryxx and @garciaswife and @gothygardner and @expensiveprincessofherself and @ask-zhe-awesome-prussia and @ac1dbvnny and @pookieadriana16 and @jett-blasts-0ff and @d3adbydawnmari0 and @slain-angel-broken-wings and @l1ly0fth3va113y and @silentthillsz and @a4a-x and @ask-aph-prussia-and-yukihirop and @pinkswirlybubbles and @allndverse and @hop2fuldream3r and @sinful-snaps234 and @br3ns1lly and @m1sssaint and @macaquewifey and @craigburnsall and @roxyyyyyyyy and @kennieluvzvox and @nothingness–isdead and @sjsroom and @skinwalkerbunny and @wolf-lavender and @petrichoreghost and @urlocalengene and @mraltruist and @absvored and @h0pl3ss-dr34m3r

(Some of y’all are minors, so this bill will affect you in a very bad way! And as for those who say “But I am an adult, I’ll be fine”, consider the fact you may be forced to show your government ID just to get onto a website! No one regardless of age is safe from the bill, but especially minors)

Batman: ....

Green Lantern: What? Why? No offense, Batman, but he's not the social type, especially for something this delicate.

Wonder Woman: We figured it be best if two supernatural beings discuss. To find common ground.

Flash: Ohhhh, that makes sense.

Aquaman: It is a wise tactic.

Green Arrow: *nodding* Two scary otherworldly beings would be best. At the very least Bats wont be intimidated by the Ghost King.

Martian Manhunter: Does this mean we send in Batman alone?

Superman: Thats the plan.

Batman mentally: What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. I'm so fucked. Why are they doing this to me? I don't even have powers!

Batman out loud: I will complete this mission.