ヾ(❀╹◡╹)ﾉﾞ❀~

yes teenage girls can be dramatic and wild but honestly have u ever even seen what happens when u tell a grown man ‘no’

starting to think some of us are too good at “do it alone”. maybe we should try “do it with someone we’re not already 100% sure we’d be really great friends with just to build a potential towards that friendship”

hello my name is indie horror story author and basically my job is to lure you in with a really creative idea and hook that gets you super excited and then right when things start to get good im gonna throw the atmosphere and my writing style out the window and start introducing liiikeee cults and government organizations and all the characters are gonna turn into like one-liner blurting action heroes who get into likeeee gunfights and car chases and stufffff and then its gonna like keep escalating until you feel like youre reading a marvel movie script plz buy my novel i started out on nosleep

i like people who keep their trash in their pocket until they find a trash can to throw it away

explained to an 8 year old that once a fruit is ripe you only have so much time until it rots so you have to eat it soon and she said so i'll never be able to keep it perfect like this forever? no and there are about a million pieces of art for you unrelatedly

my dead wife. the ad free internet

she sent him to die among the stars. she made sure the ship's system knew exactly how he liked his coffee.

(no beers in) So how do you perceive me in the privacy of your thoughts

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

can we focus on the gnome for a second

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

these are the people i have to share a highway with

play toys ?

come play toys

the prince of darkness commands you

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

the problem with employment is it gives you money to purchase video games but it takes away your time to play video games. Mao spoke of this