rip to my tumblr theme

Context for anyone who is wondering: Lamine Yamal's parents won an UNICEF raffle for a charity photoshoot in which Barça players posed with kids, and 5 month old Lamine happened to get 20yo Messi. Which is like. Literally insane

Boob job from a girl with big naturals...?

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes

So with voting do you cum when a person get bitten into or when a person is swallowed or does it depend on the moment

usually you just mark a ballot with a pen or you select the candidate you want on a screen. sometimes you hole punch the ballot though

Come to the library. We will laminate your penis for free.

no no no put me back in the loop I almost did it perfect please put me back just a few more tries and I think I could really nail it please put me back

literally drinking a beer by the lake and still opened tumblr. some of us are beyond saving

Easily the most annoying kind of vampire in the world are the ones where you finally corner the fuckers and when you're going in with the stake they start spouting off sociology 101 bullshit to try and weasel out of it. "Oh, no ethical consumption under capitalism," "oh, the rich are the real vampires if you think about it-" yeah, yeah, you ate like fifty homeless people, asshole. Hold still

Okay but if you aren't a vegetarian your case against vampires is actually pretty weak.

I SAID HOLD STILL

Your heart is not true enough to enter the gates of Margaritaville

:33 < sighhhhh... is it pure enough for kokomo atleast? I need SOMETHING to look forward to....

Actually, Nepeta from Homestuck, you're good to come in

homura soft resets the timeline to get a shiny madoka

you have to post bull shit online. to fulfill your amazing digital purpose

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

i swear if the wizard doesnt let me out of his abandoned salt mine soon im gonna fucking LOSE IT

what did you do to be put into the salt mine

i MAY have eaten his special wizard meal. but i think he should let me out tbh

was it good? was it worth it? are you able to bear the weight of your sin?

im not gonna lie it was fucking delicious i would fucking do it again. wait shit youre the fucking wizard in disguise seeing if ive learned my lesson arent you. fuck.

10 YEARS IN THE ABANDONED SALT MINE.

apple spider vinegar

hard day? dont worry. i just doordashed you a big angry live bug in a really thin box.