Eri Getting Fit

These thoughts are breaking me.

That’s all.

Guess who’s back betches.

So @miss-bunny-who tagged me to sds. I have to be honest. I wasn’t going to do it. Then I realized it was a perfect opportunity to point out some mental health realism. This look is what I call my “summer depression/severe ocd” look. During the summer, I go from seeing my friends every day at work to not seeing them for 2 months unless I can convince myself that the day is worth getting out of bed for. This look is: - I haven’t had a reason to leave my house in 3 days. - I haven’t showered in 3 days. - I threw on gym clothes to get coffee yesterday. - I won’t ask my friends to hang out because I can’t stand the way I look right now. - my OCD is going haywire. You can’t tell in this picture really, but my dermatillomania is out of control right now. If you saw me in person, you wouldn’t want to talk to me. I timed myself just for fun the last time I was in the bathroom today. For 47 minutes, I leaned in to the mirror to pull the skin off of my face. Earlier today, I had to hold a tissue to my cheek for ten minutes because the bleeding wouldn’t stop. My skin is swollen and on fire. Dermatillomania is very real. It hurts and it’s not something I can stop just because you tell me to (trust me, my mother even tried putting post-it notes on the mirrors telling me to stop) and I just want people to realize it. I have to wear make up every single second of my life. On days that I don’t, I’ve caught people staring. I’ve been made fun of for my skin. I’ve had kids ask me why my face was bleeding. So...here’s a sds for you. Sorry to turn it into such a bummer.