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π€ When everything is black
Theo sighed in response, his body seeming to melt even more under his hands.
He would be okay. Liam clung to that thought with all his strength. Theo would be okay.
They just had to wait for the darkness to pass.
"Can you let me go for a second?" he asked only after a few more minutes, an idea flashing through his mind "then I can cuddle you until tomorrow."
Theo, reluctant, nodded before letting him go.
In response, Liam crouched down in front of him so he could look him in the eye.
"I know you said no shower, but how about a bath?" he then asked, studying his reaction "you can get in the tub and I can wash your hair and freshen you up a bit."
Theo didn't move a single muscle, nothing that could have indicated a reaction; he was paralyzed.
"I know you don't believe me now, but it'll make you feel a lot better being clean."
That finally seemed to convince him, because Theo just gave a small nod.
"Okay, then let's go," he encouraged again, grabbing his hands and pulling him out of bed for the second time in an hour.
Once in the bathroom, Liam simply let him undress slowly, searching for shampoo and body wash that wouldn't irritate his nose too much, the bathrobe that Theo always left in a different place in the bathroom, and a new sponge.
With that done, he returned to the tub only to find Theo sitting in it, staring into space, his arms wrapped around his knees as he shivered from the cold.
He seemed so small. Liam felt his heart creaking.
"I'm sorry I'm so hard to be with," Theo muttered in a small voice.
Liam just wanted to shake him until he would stop saying stupid things.
What he did instead was crouch down beside the tub.
"You're not," he simply said, gently caressing his cheekbone until Theo turned his head "I just hate seeing you like this."
Theo leaned into his hand, seeking warmth.
He was so beautiful. He didn't seem to be made for feeling like this.
"Can I kiss you?" Liam asked slowly.
Liam didn't need to be asked twice, simply placing a chaste kiss on his dry lips, testing his reaction, before kissing him a little harder.
Liam remained silent, his eyes fixed on his hands again, the zoo dead silent around them.
"Liam," Theo then called gently, "why don't you tell me what's happening?"
Liam seemed to think for a moment before answering, "I had a nightmare."
"Okay," Theo then nodded, lightly stroking his knee, "what kind of nightmare?"
"About... about something that happened here."
"And what happened here?"
Liam just shook his head. "I can't..."
"You know, I've been wondering for a year what this zoo mean to you," Theo replied, looking around "isn't that something you've brought enough?"
Liam looked up at him, his blue eyes filled with tears.
"Talk to me," Theo then murmured, his voice soft "you deserve to feel better."
Liam seemed to give in to those words, his head falling forward before speaking again.
"Brett," he let out in a breath.
"Okay, Brett," Theo then encouraged.
"He was..." he tried to say before a strangled sound escaped his mouth.
Theo grabbed his hand in response, intertwining their fingers, squeezing tightly.
"He was the captain when I was still at... at my old school, and he made me on the team," Liam continued, struggling to keep his voice steady.
"We fought a lot at first," he continued, starting to play with his fingers, running his thumb over his knuckles "he was him and I... well, I was me, and it was... it was hard to get along."
"It seems believable," Theo replied, a little mesmerized by the soft fingers on his hand.
"But then one day he kissed me," Liam surprised him, stiffening a little "yeah, we were in the locker room and the others had left and we started arguing and it happened, but I... I panicked and ran away."
Theo thought briefly about the fist bump after their first kiss with a wave of affection "Yeah, it sounds like something you could do."
"I wasn't... I'd never even considered that option, and suddenly... suddenly he was a boy."
Theo nodded quietly, not interrupting.
"It took me a few days, but I finally went to him and we... we talked and we both decided that we wanted... we wanted to move forward, but it wasn't... it wasn't something either of us were ready to share."
At that point, Theo began to read the general outline of Liam's story.
"Things usually go badly at this point," he simply commented.
In response, Liam closed his eyes for a second, his breathing quickening.
Theo squeezed his hand again.
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