a murder of crows confined to a human form

like come on. she lacks trust towards her colleagues because her dad died from medical neglect and racism, and now she is overly cautious and does her best to prevent any mistakes even if that goal is futile and impossible. she wants to be the perfect doctor and has an HR manual in her head but also can't help it when her feelings take control when she has to treat cases that she feels specifically emotionally connected to. she's kind to students and encourages them to believe in themselves, but when they make a misstep she's quick to correct them, even if that can be blunt. she has the best patient satisfaction scores, but if her plan isn't taken seriously she defends herself and can stay rigid in her standpoint. she's data driven, detail oriented and wants what's best, but has a hard time accepting non conventional ways to treat patients outside of protocol. if she relates to a patient she goes above and beyond, but can't distance herself from them when something out of her control happens. she's dedicated and driven, working till she drops, but her lack of social life and friends has caused her to be closed off and refuse to accept any help. she has a full future plan worked out in great detail but has a literal panic attack when it blows up in her face and she realises she doesn't have a plan b. she can admit her mistakes, but they make her spiral so much that she immediately thinks she doesn't deserve her place in the ED. she wants to do everything she can to help people, but becomes her own obstacle in order to do so.

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

This Tumblr post is the first time someone has explained to me *why* I couldn’t feed them before those instances.

every single time i have had to say, "i understand that if he had food or water, he could aspirate it into his lungs under anesthesia. i am not lying to you." THEN someone would make a little note and i would stop being repeatedly asked.

not a single time was that risk explained to me. the only reason it came up was because i already knew. i still don't understand why it isn't standard pre-op counseling or pre-op check information, when me as a parent acknowledging the actual risk also put THE MEDICAL STAFF at ease because i conveyed that i had informed understanding as reason to not lie about giving my kid food.

"I think a lot of what drives her is the passing of her father; and though that's not explicitly delved into in the show like for a lot of the characters[...] everyone has that thing that makes them tick"

"One thing i did, especially for season two, is that i wrote letters to him in different stages of her life, especially when she was in medical school, promising the kind of doctor she was gonna be, and the goals she would strive to as a medical professional for him"

"I think pittfest really redeemed her, and showed us that she can work in a fast paced environment. I think a lot of it is decision paralysis, which can also be a strength. She's found more balance. She has that diagnostic superpower where she can look under the surface and see what's going on"

"I hear from a lot of people; people with chronic pain, chronic disease, conditions where they weren't believed, especially women and women of colour, they really want this doctor. I mean i want this doctor. [...] There is so much in women's healthcare especially, where there's just no research done for... like there's still no real way to diagnose endometrioses without an invasive surgery for example"

"Doctor Mohan is that doctor that says 'no i am going to listen to you, even if other people call you crazy[...]' and i don't think it's a specific type of patient; even with the geriatric cases she doesn't dismiss them just because they are older, she sees their problems and she is going to fix it"

"i think she only realises how innapropriate and in some ways traumatic it was that her boss spoke to her that way after he left the room, and she sort of sees everyone looking at her; that is only the moment where she's like 'what just happened'"

"Especially as a subordinate, so much of your future depends on whether your attending likes you or not, and she's trying to stay in this hospital. It's very destabilising to her. It really sort of came out of nowhere, she thought they were on better terms"

"[during the ambulance bay scene] This is the first time that she's learning literally anything about him; she's trying to process it after these weird few hours with him. It gives her more insight into why. I don't know if things are 100% okay, i think she just sort of sees that he's going through it too"

"A lot of female residents or med students have this sort of weird dynamic with superiors where they are kind of seen as less than in some ways, or taken less seriously"

"[about Orlando] She never wanted to be in the position of the doctor who delivered the news to her family; she always thought she was gonna cover all her bases and is now met with this immovable force that is the American healthcare system and insurance. Even though there is a much larger structural force preventing her from delivering this care, having to give the news herself kind of breaks her"

"She now has empathy for that doctor that failed her own family; there is very complicated feelings, like 'was i too harsh on them' or 'maybe they were also tired' or maybe they had a boss that was trying to get them to flip beds and thought my dad was being dramatic about his heart attack symptoms."

"When i first read her, i thought she was written as a response to, like, everything. The fact that you have to turn over these patients, and almost treat this hospital like it's a restaurant. She feels like the best way to deliver care is to not do that to the extent that it needs to be done"

"[If Samira returned to s3] I just think she's a brilliant ER doctor, and i would hope that she adds specialties to make her more fulfilled in that setting; i would hope that she would find a way to continue her research on racial disparity, and i hope she takes the next day [after the 4th of July] off"

"[ About fans response to her leaving] I guess i didn't know you liked the character that much?[laughs] No, no, i mean i know they did, but i was so surprised by how much love everyone had for her. That's what i'm gonna miss the most, all the love and the community that people formed around the character"

"[About Samira's most challenging case] I think it was really the sickle cell patient; we filmed that very soon after Sonya Massey was murdered. I think it was really overwhelming for me to come in and deal with those dynamics with the sickle cell patient. I told Ashley(Joyce) that we could always take a breather"

"I don't think Samira does karaoke, i think she's just kinda sitting in the corner and hoping no one notices she's there"

"[About what she'll miss the most] Oh, i mean the cast, definitely. I've made some lifelong friends there, and it's gonna be weird seeing them not in scrubs because we don't hang out outside of set a lot. Now i will have see them outside of a scrub setting"

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

There’s so much potential for them to bond and for the show to explore the ways in which they parallel one another, but no, the writers would rather we spend more screen time on the motorcycle and than relationships between women in the workplace.

Both Mohan and Santos have been publicly berated, humiliated, and harassed by their superiors in the workplace. There is so much that could have been explored in what could have had the potential to be a solid and engaging narrative.

Santos jumped at the chance to take blame and protect Mohan when she made the wrong call with the seizure patient in s1, having her be completely unaware of Robby's rant post panic attack is such a missed opportunity.

Robby blows up at Mohan over her panic attack in a way that mirrors Langdon’s blow up at Santos? Robby riding Mohan for 2 seasons straight (it's implied it's a reoccurring issue so in reality who knows how long he's actually been at it) then he yells at Langdon for riding Santos so closely and not backing the fuck off on their first shift together? Robby does not practice what he preaches, he actively engages in the exact behavior he told Langdon off for. And yet there’s nothing to explore there? Its just supposed to be seen as an act of tough love from Robby when it so closely mirrors the verbal lashing Santos received from Langdon about the seizure patient? Are you serious?

It would have been so nice to see someone in Mohan's corner, someone who has also been made to question her place in the ED and her skills by a man in a position of power over her. It would have been to nice to see someone who is going through the same self doubt and shaken confidence talk to her and support her. She needs someone to be there to reassure her and flat out tell her that Robby's just being a little bitch and projecting his mommy issues, and I think Santos would be the perfect person for the job.

Even if not during season 2, having Santos and Mohan get closer during the time skip or over the course of season 3 would have been so good. Mohan is so outwardly empathetic and caring and Santos who feels like she really has to be jaded and keep walls up. They have so much they could learn from one another and I would have liked to see these two very different people coming together over a shared experience and helping each other grow from it.

It would also be great to see how it would impact Santos's perception of Robby and struggle with the complex feelings that come from watching someone you trust so deeply engage in the same harmful behavior that hurt you in the past. Santos feels like Robby is the only person who gets things, he's the only person in that ED who she thinks is sane. Having Mohan and Santos bond would be a really great way to jumpstart Santos' realization that Robby isn't actually infallible and that he's actually really fucked her over with his handling of the diversion (and that's its possible some of her anger regarding the situation is misplaced).