An rien peut arrêter moi konin la

come here so i can pinch you with my clamping beak!

Trying to fuck a girl with alters starting every text with to whom it may concern

Trying to fuck a girl with antlers starting every text with hello my deer

Oh easy mistake. Yearning actually rises from the floor and longing hangs from the ceiling

you are not immune to inventing an arbitrary set of rules that only you have to adhere to

this morning i got a spam call that just played clown waiting music for a few seconds and then hung up on me. which really pissed me off a lot

once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out

Boob job from a girl with big naturals...?

good god when the mr clean magic eraser hits the stove......

the panties hit the floor

you know it brother

Cant tell you how many times I rawd*gged my husband after I caught him using a magic eraser to clean the pasta sauce I burned onto the burner like some kind of primordial insect

you know what i wish you would tell me

elvis died because it wasnt getting enough fiber

ive never fucked up someones pronouns this badly before, sorry

Dude my coworker left a scrumptious cookie unattended