「SPARKLE」

making friends is all that matters! being nice is all that fucking matters!

i dont mean this in some weenie way i mean this with my fucking fists up

i love declining birth rates 🥰 "what a horrible problem! society will collapse!" oopsie it looks like you're gonna have to make having children worth it 😊 teehee you're gonna have to improve society in order to fix this problem, or it will all collapse. oh noooooo. how horrible. :3c

thank u for being a cooler blog than me and not unfollowing me yet

in 50 years the mcelroy brothers are still doing their podcast and they release an episode ending it early "because justin is getting really old and we don't want to have to do a sad one" and then justin starts coughing a lot and everyone starts talking faster

hey sorry i can't come out tonight i have a thing

The entire point of, OK, my phone really wants to call it Anastasia so I guess we’re doing that? The entire point of Anastasia (as administered by a board-certified Anastasiologist) during sugary. Sugary? Haven’t I suffered enough? The entire point of Anastasia during augury. Jesus Christ. Hold up. You know what, augury is preferable to sugary. Augury is obviously performed by an auger (makes sense if you give it a think) whereas sugary is performed by…? A sugardaddy? NO THANK YOU. Anyway. The entire point of Anastasia is so that you don’t know what music your sturgeon. Fuck right off. Was playing. While you were under. You’re not supposed to wake up from Anastasia and immediately realize you managed to get earwormed by Motörhead’s “Ace of Spades” during your sugary.

Ok everyone let’s think beautiful thoughts about masculine women today.

(begging you to get me started) UGH don't get me started.......