Elisrants Proud S(hr)imp

⚔️ Silver Vanrouge never really thought too hard about the idea of animals loving him, it was just a fact, like the grass being green and the sky being blue, so imagine his shock when this very ditzy, yet beautiful woman, steps out of her coffin during the Opening ceremony, and not only was the direbeast named Grim immediately drawn to her, but animals from outside started to flock to her as well. All the more oddly enough, she is able to fluently communicate with the crowd of animals surrounding her, even though Animal Communications was a class taught only in colleges or academy’s like Night Raven. Your ability to cook also paired with your innate lack of introverted-ness, and to become friends with anyone who you interact with really endeared you to him, since, let’s be honest, Lilia, despite being an amazing father to Silver, did not have the skills of a…masterful chef, to say the least. And Silver isn’t exactly known for his approachability on account of his RBF. Not only that, but your love of nature had you following him around to interact with the animals that you two naturally draw towards yourselves. (Ignore the fact that the bunnies have started trying to nudge you two closer, and that the birds try to lift your arms to hold hands.) The cherry on top of the already overwhelmingly perfect cake for Silver Vanrouge? You two share an overwhelming desire to make your fathers proud, but since your father is in a completely different world, maybe Lilia can be your father in law?

☘️ Trey Clover, even in his wildest dreams, never could have imagined the gorgeous smokeshow that magically appeared in his kitchen, would just come up to him and ask to make raisin bread with him. He had to blink twice to make sure that the stunning woman that just showed up in his kitchen with a dorky little chefs hat, a powder covered “kiss the cook” apron, and worn through oven mitts actually meant it, and wasn’t trying to pull a magicam prank with Cater! Albeit a little reluctantly, Trey eventually does end up helping you making this wonderful raisin bread recipe, and he finds that despite your lackadaisical and carefree attitude, you are an excellent cook, and wash your own dishes when you’re done, something that he unfortunately can’t say for half his dormates. not to mention after you guys were finished and Treys Siblings started calling, he answered so you came up to say hi, they immediately loved you! Saying that they can’t wait for Treys “girlfriend” to visit for winter break, and that they’ve heard so much about you! Just ignore the pink dusting Treys cheeks, please. But maybe if you accept, you two can give his siblings some nieces and nephews?

🐍 Jamil Viper sighed so loud in his head when you appeared in Scarabia, that he actually thought that he went deaf from how loud he sighed. Unfortunately he didn’t, and was forced to watch from the kitchen, as Kalim tried convincing you of meeting with his cousin, Minajael, to see if you would love his tigers or not! Deciding that the conservation should just end there, Jamil, not so subtly, takes you to the kitchen, away from your overwhelmingly naïve companion, who just blinks, then winks at Jamil before walking away. At Kalims implication Jamil lets go of your arm, only to find that you already have started to read through the recipe book that Jamil had left out, as he was planning on making lunch before Kalim decided it was a good idea to out Darwin’s theory to the test. Surprisingly enough, even though you seemed only a tad bit better in naïveté than Kalim, you actually skimmed through the cookbook like you know what you were doing, and instead of asking Jamil incessant questions like Kalim would, you just ask him if you can help with his cooking. Jamil wasn’t sure if he completely trusted you yet but he relented, upon seeing that, just like Kalim, you don’t have a single bad bone in your body. Jamil finds that cooking with you is oddly pleasant, your extra movements like twirling the ladles and dancing may seem a little weird but it adds a liviness to cooking that Jamil forgot was there, after cooking for the Al-Asims for so long. Jamil finds that after your very successful cooking session, he desperately needs to interact with you more, talking about interests, hobbies, different recipes from your world, all of the things that he’s never saw himself imagining. Deciding that he can’t deal with the mental implications of his raging thoughts, he talks to his sister about it, and his sister started teasing him about having a crush, as unhelpful as that was, Jamil found that he really didn’t mind imagining a life with you outside of Night Raven. Maybe you two could open up a freestyle dance studio once he gains his freedom from the Al-Asims, your kids would obviously gain free admission of course!

🐉 Malleus Draconia knew as soon as he met you, that he would just have to marry you, your immense beauty paired with your inability to judge someone based off of their title, really made him fall head over heels for you. I mean, it’s not everyday that the Malleus Draconia meets a woman who doesn’t want him for his power, but just wants to hang out with him since he has “good vibes”. Through further “hanging out” with you, Malleus discovers that every time he is with you, under the starlit sky near Ramshackle, he learns more and more things that solidify his overwhelming love for you. For example he recently figured out you love animals and that you used to teach a local children’s club on animals and nature. Malleus thinks for a minute, on why that statement made him so flustered and hot, and that’s when he realized, that he would love to have children with you, to see you embracing them lovingly and teaching them about Briar Valley as the heirs to the Draconia Bloodline, not to mention that despite being human, you have a beautiful strength hidden beneath that fragile skin, that Malleus finds himself fantasizing more and more about the longer that you stay together.

💄 Vil Schoenheit was enraptured by you from the moment he laid eyes on you, from your gorgeous hair, to your innate beauty, everything about you screamed beauty that Vil must help bloom. Vil regularly gifts you large amounts of skincare, along with gracefully handwritten letters that give you explicit instructions on how to use them correctly, and in return for his generosity, you help Vil carry his costumes or makeup bags, or even suitcases to movie sets halfway across twisted wonderland. Ignore Vil staring at your arms flexing when you lift up a trunk filled with props, and ignore his hands lingering on your body when taking your “measurements”, and definitely ignore the way that he is simply obsessed with making the perfect “loose” outfit for you! Though the “loose” clothing in question does look eerily similar to maternity clothes, but don’t worry about that! Besides Vil already has his dad’s blessing…

—-

And it just so happens that the same reason that the Twst cast falls for you, also attracts good for nothing punks who only catcall and disrespect you for being Naïve or a “pushover”, this obviously enrages the Twst boys, and they do anything in their power to protect the national treasure that is Kronk! Reader. And if you want to take it literally, there are 2 princes at that school, one of which has expressed his deep devotion to you, and it would be very easy for Malleus to make you an ambassador of Briar Valley-Human Relations. You also have the possibility to become a famous stagehand for Vil Schoenheit, a world renowned chef whose bakery is run with her husband, the wife to a lifelong friend and guard of Malleus Draconia, or the good cop when Jade (the bad cop) decides to torment another soul with his obsession with mushrooms (only rivaled by his love for you), or being able to wake up everyday to delicious food cooked by your amazing husband that broke away from the Al-Asim family to start a famous Dance Studio renowned the world over. Thus becoming an actual national treasure that no one would dare try to take advantage of or manipulate to do evil ever again!

—-

I’m not responsible for what you read, but some trigger warnings include: Yandere (obviously), child abuse themes, yelling, cursing, spoilers for book 1, reader being older than Riddle, everyone teaming up to beat the shit out of Riddles mom, and Riddle really needing therapy

—-

🌹 Let’s be so fr you know what you got into when you started being friends with Riddle after his overblot. He really is trying to work on himself but he honestly can’t help that he feels bubbling rage towards those measly card soldiers Ace and Deuce for taking up all your time! You helped him with his overblot, you didn’t punch or provoke him, so why should you give your attention to that stupid Ace?! (Ace slander kinda deserved tbh)

🌹 Riddle really does want to change for you, he NEEDS to be a friend you want to keep around so that he may help you as you helped him, he wants to be YOUR best friend that you coddle and coo at for getting high grades, he wants to feel the validation he didn’t get from his mother from you.

🌹 Riddle will help you study and even will give sly hints towards answers on Professor Treins tests because he desperately craves the validation that he needs to fall from your lips.

🌹 Similar to a proud child, Riddle will show off test scores and Equestrian club clips showcasing his prowess just for your praise (always for your praise)

🌹 The amount of times Riddle has to prevent himself from calling you his older sibling/parent is astounding, he just really needs someone to be a better parental figure than his mother, and while you think of him as a cute little Second year that just craves validations from someone like you, that has older sibling vibes (Trey can suck my dih). Riddle sees every new compliment and praise, as you slowly getting more and more comfortable with the idea of being Riddles older sibling.

🌹 Riddle isn’t very prone to gossip or rumors but something about the way that you rush to Heartslaybul to gossip about Ace and Deuce doing something stupid again really makes him feel like you are the missing puzzle piece to his imagined perfect family.

🌹 HOWEVER never let the gossip turn towards crushes or romantic interests because he will make the person who you are interested in either 1. Regret existence as he points out every flaw they have ever, or 2. Actually pick a fight with Riddle Rosehearts himself (again Ace)

🌹 Riddle will NEVER yell at you, if he does he actually will seek out the other Housewardens to see if they have any suitable punishments for him, because you are so amazing to him that he can’t ever forgive himself for being like his mother towards the ‘family’ that he chose.

🌹 On another, less depressing note, Riddle will actually start to pickup on the gossip talks that you have, bringing his favorite strawberry tarts and teas as you ramble about your day, as he chimes in with very formal, yet sassy, commentary. Eventually every other day is you and Riddle hanging out, just talking about anything and everything.

🌹 Riddle actually does do something that kind of annoys you but endears you at the same time, and that is taking your stuff. From notebooks and pens, nothing of yours is safe from Riddle, his excuse being that he likes your style of (items?). Riddle will actually have a small collection of your items that he stole, to “feel closer to you” and that he just keeps “forgetting” to return to you.

🌹 But hey! On the bright side though, since his parents are loaded, he can just give you the thaumarks needed to buy new items as the cycle repeats.

🌹 To be honest I feel like you & Heartslaybul would start to grow protective over Riddle the longer the school year goes on (especially after Malleus’ overblot, even though Riddle is the Yandere), and I can totally see everybody in Heartslaybul + Chenya just ganging up and beating the absolute ever loving shit out of Mrs. Rosehearts if she dares to make a comment like “oh the prefect of Heartslaybul is not worthy of being friends with Riddle!”

And the best part is everybody has been wanting to do that for forever! it’s just that insulting you and Riddles friendship is a line she forgot she couldn’t cross, ESPECIALLY since they don’t want him to relapse from all the positive progress he’s made with you. You best believe that Mrs. Rosehearts WILL be “swimmin’ with da’ fishies” (courtesy of Octavinelle)

Honestly I can see it now, Riddle coming into the lounge of Heartslaybul, Three rotating office chairs placed ominously in the single spotlight, their backs facing Riddle. The three chairs turn around slowly, creaking eerily all the while, and when they’re fully turned around… it’s just you, Trey, and Chenya wearing suits, fedoras, and sunglasses with really tacky fake mustaches taped on. You have to try not to laugh as you put on your best Italian mob boss accent

“Who dared come to me, on the day of my brothers exam?” You mutter, looking away from Riddles confused face as Trey and Chenya solemnly nod.

“We think it was the Backstabbing traitor who threatened our valuable insider information, but we’re not to confident boss” Trey slowly added. Shaking his head and tsk-ing.

Riddle, still having no idea what’s going on, is now intrigued by what you’re doing with his two childhood friends.

“Rest assured, boss, we took care of…the trash, and she’s now swimming with the fishies.” Chenya playfully adds, somehow summoning a fish bone in his hand to further emphasize the point.

“Good, we can’t have her snooping around in the family business, make sure that there’s nothing left of her to find.” You state with a finality to your voice.

Riddle is now fully confused, until you all stand up, out of your chairs to hand him a letter that was tucked away in your coat. You all slowly walk away as the chairs rolled with you. Riddle cautiously opens the letter only to find a small handwritten note that says “Sorry, we slimed out your mom 😋 -(Name) and the gang” (think the note from Gojo to Megumi in JJK)

Riddle should be hurt, he should start sobbing and clutching the floor wondering why his friends would do such a cruel thing. Key word: should be. Instead he feels a rising euphoria in his chest, he may not understand your slang or weird emojis, but whatever you did to his mother will make sure that she will never bother him again, and honestly that’s way better than any stupid test score he would’ve tried to show you, because now he doesn’t have to worry about his mother disowning him for being your friend, or that bitch screaming at him for trying to replace her. Riddle turns around to where you guys walked out, and though not understanding your worlds Godfather reference, gives you, Trey, and Chenya a big hug as he realizes what you guys have done for him, and what he has done for you guys. It’s obvious to Riddle now, he never needed his mom when the family he really needed was right in front of him this entire time.

—-

🏹 I kinda hc that you met rook at the opening ceremony where Grim is wreaking havoc and instead of panicking you just sigh like your thirteenth reason has the structure of an essay.

🏹 Rook notices you and personally decides that stalking you will obviously help with your… less than enthusiastic approaches to see the beauty all around you!

🏹 By book 1 your best friends are as follows, Grim, the ghosts of ramshackle, Ace, Deuce, and the motherfucker in the trees saying “Treis bein!” Like he can’t fathom the idea of volume control at three in the fucking morning. So needless to say you kinda start hating on Rook, only to find that, even though he wakes you up at the asscrack of dawn, that he provides really solid advice when he’s not attempting to speak French.

🏹 Much to your chagrin you actually start to look forward to your midnight talks with Rook, because even though he is a stalker with a disturbing amount of knowledge on archery, he actually makes you laugh with his…unique observations on the student population.

“(French endearment or something) Look! Leona has taken a nap for the fifth time today and he still looks like he doesn’t have a will to live! Fascinating!” <- actively being said when Rook is perched up in a tree with comically large binoculars, as you mentally sigh and prepare yourself for the amount of (funny) verbal grenades about to be thrown by the angry lion.

🏹 Speaking of honest brutality you have not had real shit talk until you’ve met Rook Hunt. He is the undisputed second place to shit talk ever (first place being his cunty house warden) and he will shit talk with you in the most elegant Pomefoire way possible.

🏹 Definitely the type to appear at Ramshackle at 3am and have the juiciest drama to drop, paired with healthy snacks and skin care for days as you paint each others nails and watch Heathers for the millionth time in a row.

🏹 God forbid you show romantic interest in anyone, he WILL verbally nuke them, then actually nuke them because nobody dares to take his beloved bestie away from him! He will commit war crimes for you, his best friend, and the last thing your crush, before “going missing”, will see is some fuckass French guy with a bad bob burying them alive.

🏹 Actually really good at manipulating Grim into leaving you guys alone so he can gossip without gluttony incarnate spilling your shared secrets, and trust the gossip is so good that you do NAWT want that shit getting released (Release the Rook Files)

🏹 I also hc that with people he’s truly comfortable with, he will actually allow you to see his freckles and somewhat messy bed-head, so also trust that you’re gonna meet the Hunt family as the honorary adopted sibling that also happens to be from another world and that Rook basically kidnapped but details schmeetails!

—-

—-🦁

Scar: why are you even talking to this lowlife mutt? I know about 100 better options for you and they all begin with L and end with eona Kingscholar

Yuu: Scar…with all due respect as one of the revered Great seven….

Shut UP! I’m ordering me and Grims meal right now!!!

Scar: I’m just saying! Look at that Prince and tell me that he isn’t just the Beastman version of me! Not to mention that him calling you herbivore makes you blush, at least a little! Honestly you couldn’t find a better suitor if you tried Prefect!

Yuu: You know what? Yeah! I’m gonna ask him out at his next spell drive tournament! (Lying)

Scar: Atta’ prefect! Now make sure that you continue my legacy of greatness with-

Yuu: *already tuning out scar in favor of the meal they just got from the “lowlife mutt”*

Somewhere in the Botanical gardens, Leona’s ears almost flew off his head with how quickly they perked up, again because of the magic telepathic ability of “Desperate for Prefect”

—-🐙

(I wonder how you could tell Ursula’s one of my favorites)

Ursula: Honestly prefect! I may be a benevolent witch of the sea, but I’m not so benevolent as to have no standards! I mean look at that poor sea squirt and tell me he could provide half as much stability that dearest Azul of yours could!

Yuu: Ursula…sweetheart…I’m literally working at Sam’s right now- to get fancy tuna for Grim…and you mean to tell me that Azul would want to date me beyond using my literal home as collateral!

Ursula: Dear…I know that those land dwellers may have changed your standards in men, but your body language alone is better than your voice! (Compliment? By Ursula’s standards, yes) Why wouldn’t Azul want to date you? Besides, as a dweller of the sea myself, I am well acquainted with Octo-mer courting customs! And dear, why Azul may have already asked you to marry him at this point, at least with all the hints he has been dropping!

Ursula: Now! Go get that Rich Octo-mer housewarden and show him what exactly he fell for!

Yuu: Ursula…I cordially invite you to my wedding with Azul (lying?)

Ursula: *wiping a single tear rolling down her cheek,* mumbling “they grow up so fast 😔”

Azuls three hearts start beating like crazy! His prefect attracted to him meter is going off the rails! Maybe now he can prove to Jade, and Floyd, that they don’t need to steal his beloved shrimpy to show their mom

—- Bonus

Georgina has already arranged for the prefect to have a lovely underwater dinner with her and her husband, discussing their plans for the prefects wedding to their sons, Ursula now has some serious wingman compitition

—-🐍

Jafar: Prefect, I may be a lowly royal vizier, but I can see that the Viper boy is quite…how shall we say- enamored with you

Yuu: Jafar, why do you think that? Jamil literally has so much on his plate it would be impossible to even look at me for 2 seconds before having to take care of Kalim again, let alone being ‘enamored’ with me as you say!

Jafar: well, believe it, because with the amount of times Jamil has cooked for you, regardless of that buffoon Kalims antics, would make any student of Night Raven swoon.

Yuu:…I mean- he does make really good food! And his sister Najma is literally my best friend besides grim…You know what I think I will attempt to ‘court’ him as you would say Jafar! (Lying???)

*In the Scarabia Kitchen Kalim’s curry almost got burnt, because Jamil’s “prefect is talking about me in a good way” sensors were going off.*

—-🍎

Evil Queen: Prefect? Is that ugly potato trying to make you swoon when you already have eyes for Vil?! Because I wasn’t not one of the great seven for nothing- should this potato ever attempt anything that you are uncomfortable with then he will experience firsthand my notoriety with poisons!

Yuu: no need to worry Evil Queen, I have this guy handled, but if you wanna use your almighty powers on anyone, could you please tell Crowley to give me a bigger budget? I can barely afford living on my own, let alone with Grim!

Evil Queen: My dearest Spudling! Why ask for more money from that incompetent Crow, when you have the ever so beautifully generous Vil Schoenheit right in front of you! Practically peacocking his abilities and beauty to you, so that you may notice him, and provide him with an oppurtunity to woo you!

Yuu: you know, I actually don’t think that dating Vil would be that bad, granted I would have to give up my favorite junk food, but I feel like with Vil, theres some things worth giving up, for someone that you are speaking so highly of my Queen! (Lying?????)

Evil Queen: That’s right Spudling! Now go ‘bag’ as the current generation would say it, that Vil!

*Vil’s hand tightens around the brush he was using to apply his makeup, his “prefect picking up my signals”…well, signals…were maxing out, red alarms blaring in the background as his grip harshly tightens even more around the brush, breaking the delicate thing before Vil sets it down and called for Rook.

…

Vil’s huntsman may want to further investigate the lovely prefects love interests.*

—-💀

Hades: What in the Cerberus! That tech whizz loser seriously just tried to flirt with you and it’s not even halftime yet!

Yuu: Hades, that was my PC tech, one of the games I play with Idia seriously crashes my computer, so I had it checked out!

Hades: That doesn’t excuse those goo-goo eyes he was making at ya’! I could practically feel the chills down my spine and I’m made of fire!

Yuu: yeah you’re right…he was kinda giving me the creeps…and Idia would’ve fixed my PC for free too…ughhhh now I spent all my money for nothing…!

Hades: Hey kid! Don’t look now but I think my descendent that is filthy rich and loves that little chaos gremlin of yours, wants to date you! Not to mention Idia has a really nice younger brother! And he also has a fantastic…

(Hades starts clicking a skull pen and checking a notepad he pulled out of nowhere, before using the pen to scratch out a bunch of suggestions. “Diet, Sleep schedule, self care, touching grass, exercise, mental health” to name a few, are scribbled out, before hades finally says)

He has a fantastic ego when he wins a video game match, oh! And he can also doxx your enemies, but details schmeetails!

Yuu: this one- I choose this one!

*Idia somewhere in his labyrinth starts to flush pink all the way to the roots of his hair, stuttering something to Ortho about the prefect already having Idias romance route fully uncapped, all they had to do is unlock the right dialogue options, to get a SSR event with Idia in the romance department!*

—-🐉

Maleficent: Small human, not to add on to what that grass haired loudmouth (Sebek) is already stating, but do you truly believe that Malleus is not the best fit for someone such as yourself?

Yuu: No I really like Malleus, the issue is that I think he is far too out of my league. I mean he is the sole heir not only to the Draconian bloodline, but also Briar Valley! Why would he ever want a magic-less human, otherworldly human like myself?

Maleficent: My dearest, do you not realize the way in which he gazes upon you so fondly? That his nightly visits to Ramshackle are not of pure coincidence, and that he yearns for your caress of skin against his body, as he yearningly reaches out his hand for you to take, on those moonlit nights?

Yuu:…I didnt realize that Malleus is…in love…with me…?! Oh no! I guess that means I’ll have no other choice but to start officially courting him with Lilia’s consent. (Not Lying)

*Malleus’ fae ears start twitching as he feels the radio waves being sent school wide by all the housewardens, oddly enough saying the same thing, “I feel the prefect talking about me”…oh…he sees…so…the others are vying for your hand as well…and this experience of the Prefect talking about them isn’t something Malleus alone has experienced…*

The Great Seven eventually have a meeting, in which they all agree, on students that they are fond of (Overblotters), taking “turns” with the prefect!

That way the prefect can make a decision for themself on who they will date, from the Seven eligible bachelorettes, hand picked by the great seven themselves!

So prefect…

What path…or who…will you choose?