What you should know is that i have bad taste

If you were really my friend you’d do this highly unethical experimental surgery on me

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

quirky fourth wall breaking character but theyre just fucking. wrong about the medium theyre in. they keep making references to cinematic techniques and directorial styles and the other fourth wall breaking character is like "dumbass we're in a fucking comic book" and they are in a video game.

one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.

i love clicking on somebody’s ao3 profile and seeing the most nonsensical collection of fandoms. like yess let's live a thousand lifetimes

type prevs url with your eyes closed in the tags

I love tumblr because somehow I can end up being mutuals with a celebrity (someone that wrote a fic that I loved)

i love the part of making art where you feel like you need to go missing

no mom i have to be online 14 hours a day my mutuals are writing the most fucked up esoteric erotic and beautiful posts about my guys. i have to be there to experience it in real time.

Inflation has made me not understand prices anymore in the sense that I no longer understand what an appropriate price for any food is. Is a $5 bag of chips a good deal? Because that sounds fucking insane to 2018 me. And yet, that is how much they cost.

1354 words into my new fic. Think this one will be maybe 8k?

1903 words. Idk what else to say

the worst writing crime you can ever commit in my opinion is watering down the dirty talk because you’re self-conscious that it sounds like it’s from a bad porno…..i cannot stress this enough……leave it alone. the moment you tell yourself he would not fucking say that you’re doomed. people will say almost anything if their dick is hard enough

i too would trade my child for seven corn kernels