I’m Back :)

shallan and adolin's marriage just gets funnier the longer you think about it. shallan's family is on the verge of bankruptcy because she Murdered Her Father so she decides to Rob A Princess instead of just asking for help like a normal person. she's not sure if she should go through with the robbery until the princess, now her teacher, murders several people in front of her in a live action trolley problem. the robbery succeeds, because jasnah has been hiding magic powers from the world via fake jewellery for the past six years. however, the guilt and shallan's own magical powers, as well as her doomed romance with an assassin, disturb her so badly that she fakes a suicide attempt to avoid talking things out. she ultimately admits to robbing jasnah, who had no idea she'd been robbed, and nearly dies again at the hands of her assassin boyfriend. jasnah is wary of her, but ultimately decides she's not too dangerous, so it's only right to help out this poor idiot girl who she definitely does not care about what are you talking about. how to help her? firstly, fix the damn soulcaster. secondly, get her mother to arrange a betrothal between shallan and her cousin. why her cousin? because adolin has managed to piss off literally every single woman in alethkar, and shallan is so ignorant of red flags that she, as previously mentioned, fell for an assassin. the betrothal goes ahead, minus the stumbling block of jasnah seemingly being assassinated mid-journey. shallan ultimately makes it to the shattered plains. on her first date with adolin she asks him if he's ever shat himself in battle. true love.

it's okay if you as a lesbian want to fuck the straight blonde popstar but you can't be pretending she's a lesbian too girl at least make it a lesbian corruption kink or some shit

That obe tumblr user really did manage to fuck the white out of her

Can't let British people have air conditioning because first they'd call it something twee like "the climate fixer" and then in 20 years they'll call it "the climb" or "the climmy"

French kids would call it "le climot", frustrating language officials who would prefer they call it "machine pour le contrôle du climat froide à l'interieure de l'édifice"

Need head from a broad with acid reflux. Make it sizzle princess

how does tumblr think they can possibly police the content on this website

the world is a strange and wonderous place

happy 2025 to this post

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

oh this is my post

Whats wrong, you barely touched your pellets

I need a mix of wet and dry food.

What the fuck. You talk?

I'm unmedicated as FUCK broooooooo!!!!

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits