don't look at me

alright this is a hold up. put the pussy in the scarmophogoghs and nobody gets hurt.

fuuuck accidentally mixed up dowsing rods and sounding rods and now my pepeneus can detect freshwater springs

Men crumple so beautifully when you cup their cheeks and whisper "there's my pretty boy" against their lips before kissing them

strapjobs r awesome bc u can lowkey chew it a little if u want

me (about stay up for hours and jerk off): I'm going to sleep now it's getting late

"He has a 12 inch cock" well my pussy ain't a fucking magicians hat bitch where is all that supposed to go

bdsm scene where I’m a subway worker and I get your sandwich wrong 6 times in a row (in a dom way)

the really annoying thing is that even when you're making something with your dick it still takes effort. like this thing is going to be soooo good and appealing to my personal tastes. once this stupid motherfucker finishes it