Efox Kitty

Because, somehow, Jawhn and Jonathan have incidentally created a PERFECT representation of generational trauma and how difficult it is to break.

Because, if you think about it, Jawhn and Jonathan are very similar in almost every way. They both grew up in the apocalypse with harsh fathers and loving mothers, both of whom are dead now, they both were or are apart of survivalist groups, (Jawhn in Lazarus and Jonathan in a group he’s mentioned called the Survivors), they both have done morally questionable things for these groups and their goals for a cure, they have experienced extreme loss and seen the worst of humanity, and Jawhn has faith in a cure just like Jonathan did at his (nearly exact!) age! They are so, SO similar. It’s almost uncanny.

The biggest things that set them apart are 1. Time. Jonathan was born earlier, just before the infection started, he saw whatever good humanity might have had be torn apart from the beginning. Meanwhile, Jawhn was born within the apocalypse, it’s all he’s ever known. And 2. Their bravery. Because Jonathan has openly admitted to people that he is a capital c Coward. It’s the only reason he’s survived this far. He is emotionally and physically avoidant of everything so he isn’t hurt. Jawhn, on the other hand, has STUPID AMOUNTS of bravery. He cannot give up on ANYTHING. He won’t give up on honesty, or a cure, or other people, or anything. It’s so intense that it often puts him and the people he cares about directly in harms way, and yet, HE PERSISTS. He, like Jonathan, has lost nearly everything and he still continues .

And these two things are exactly why they both hate each other, and why they can never leave each other alone. The way I see it, they are perfect representations of the younger and older generations. Jonathan is the elder generation, and he has been traumatized to hell and back. To the point that he’s practically given up on life. And Jawhn is the younger generation who is determined to break the cycle of generational trauma.

Jawhn has kind of, in a weird way, made Jonathan almost like his pet project. Jawhn has lost everything in Paradise City. Cyn, Jophiel, Woogie, and now Zora too. The only thing he has left is Lazarus, he even says so himself. So, other than the potential for a cure, why does he stick around? Why doesn’t he go back to Lazarus? I genuinely believe it’s mostly because of Jonathan. Jonathan has also lost everything EXCEPT… for Spidey. She is to him as Lazarus is to Jawhn. And Jawhn is unusually invested in getting them to reunite. He continuously tells Jonathan to go to Spidey, even if he has to yell it in his face, and drag him to her kicking and screaming. He even goes out of his way to tell Spidey when he sees her, “Jonathan cares about you. He’s looking for you, you both need each other.” He has this intense need to help Jonathan despite his VERY OPEN dislike of the man. And I think it’s because, even though they truly hardly know eachother, Jawhn and Jonathan are so similar that they understand each other in a way nobody else quite can. Jawhn NEEDS to see Jonathan find hope, find Spidey, because he needs to prove to himself, to Jonathan, to EVERYONE, that hope is still possible. That people can get better. That HE can still get better, even after everything. Because he is acutely aware that if he stops being brave enough to believe in hope, then everything he’s gone through will have been pointless, and he is going to end up EXACTLY like Jonathan. It almost seems like he won’t let himself return to Lazarus until he proves it.

And this is where their hatred of each other comes in. In fact, their hatred of each other only makes the relationship more realistic. Because, if any of you have ever tried to push back against generational trauma specifically by helping your older family members, it is INFURIATING. It’s like watching a bird continue to sit in its cage after the door has been unlocked. Jawhn literally says when he’s taking to Spidey “I’ve given him so many chances to be better.” Because he has! He is always asking “Jonathan, help us find a cure, help us save these people, find Spidey, find hope.” And Jonathan, true to his own cowardice, refuses every advance. He can’t have hope. Hope means running the risk of losing it, and he can’t handle that pain for the millionth time. When suffering is all you’ve ever known, good things become terrifying. AND OH GOD DOES IT CAUSE CONFLICT BETWEEN THESE TWO. Literally every interaction they have feels like a constant fight. A fight that Jonathan is always trying to run from, as he has always done, and one that Jawhn is always trying to pursue, as he has always done. They both openly admit to disliking each other, and still they end up together strangely often.

Jawhn physically cannot give up on anything, especially Jonathan, who reminds him so much of the future he does not want for himself. And Jonathan physically cannot give a shit about anything, especially Jawhn and his stupid hope for a cure that reminds him so much of his younger self.

And the best part is… it’s kind of working. I don’t think Jawhn is the sole reason Jonathan is changing his ways, far from it. There are a LOT of factors at play in Jonathan’s character arc. But I think that Jawhn is sometimes the only person who will tell Jonathan exactly what he needs to hear. Because sometimes he needs to have it screamed in his face for it to get through. And sometimes Jawhn needs be reminded that what he says has any kind of impact, he needs be reminded that things can get better. That his hope is not totally misplaced. Because if Jonathan can change, then anyone can, right?

I truly do not think that these two will ever be able to form a healthy or loving relationship with each other, I actually really hope they don’t, but I think that there is something positive to be gained from their constant conflict. I hope they continue to challenge each other, and maybe, someday, become better because of it. I hope they both get their happy endings far, far away from each other. Because the thing that brings them together is suffering and the need to be free of it, and when they are free of suffering, they will therefore be free of each other.

Because, somehow, Jawhn and Jonathan have incidentally created a PERFECT representation of generational trauma and how difficult it is to break.

Because, if you think about it, Jawhn and Jonathan are very similar in almost every way. They both grew up in the apocalypse with harsh fathers and loving mothers, both of whom are dead now, they both were or are apart of survivalist groups, (Jawhn in Lazarus and Jonathan in a group he’s mentioned called the Survivors), they both have done morally questionable things for these groups and their goals for a cure, they have experienced extreme loss and seen the worst of humanity, and Jawhn has faith in a cure just like Jonathan did at his (nearly exact!) age! They are so, SO similar. It’s almost uncanny.

The biggest things that set them apart are 1. Time. Jonathan was born earlier, just before the infection started, he saw whatever good humanity might have had be torn apart from the beginning. Meanwhile, Jawhn was born within the apocalypse, it’s all he’s ever known. And 2. Their bravery. Because Jonathan has openly admitted to people that he is a capital c Coward. It’s the only reason he’s survived this far. He is emotionally and physically avoidant of everything so he isn’t hurt. Jawhn, on the other hand, has STUPID AMOUNTS of bravery. He cannot give up on ANYTHING. He won’t give up on honesty, or a cure, or other people, or anything. It’s so intense that it often puts him and the people he cares about directly in harms way, and yet, HE PERSISTS. He, like Jonathan, has lost nearly everything and he still continues .

And these two things are exactly why they both hate each other, and why they can never leave each other alone. The way I see it, they are perfect representations of the younger and older generations. Jonathan is the elder generation, and he has been traumatized to hell and back. To the point that he’s practically given up on life. And Jawhn is the younger generation who is determined to break the cycle of generational trauma.

Jawhn has kind of, in a weird way, made Jonathan almost like his pet project. Jawhn has lost everything in Paradise City. Cyn, Jophiel, Woogie, and now Zora too. The only thing he has left is Lazarus, he even says so himself. So, other than the potential for a cure, why does he stick around? Why doesn’t he go back to Lazarus? I genuinely believe it’s mostly because of Jonathan. Jonathan has also lost everything EXCEPT… for Spidey. She is to him as Lazarus is to Jawhn. And Jawhn is unusually invested in getting them to reunite. He continuously tells Jonathan to go to Spidey, even if he has to yell it in his face, and drag him to her kicking and screaming. He even goes out of his way to tell Spidey when he sees her, “Jonathan cares about you. He’s looking for you, you both need each other.” He has this intense need to help Jonathan despite his VERY OPEN dislike of the man. And I think it’s because, even though they truly hardly know eachother, Jawhn and Jonathan are so similar that they understand each other in a way nobody else quite can. Jawhn NEEDS to see Jonathan find hope, find Spidey, because he needs to prove to himself, to Jonathan, to EVERYONE, that hope is still possible. That people can get better. That HE can still get better, even after everything. Because he is acutely aware that if he stops being brave enough to believe in hope, then everything he’s gone through will have been pointless, and he is going to end up EXACTLY like Jonathan. It almost seems like he won’t let himself return to Lazarus until he proves it.

And this is where their hatred of each other comes in. In fact, their hatred of each other only makes the relationship more realistic. Because, if any of you have ever tried to push back against generational trauma specifically by helping your older family members, it is INFURIATING. It’s like watching a bird continue to sit in its cage after the door has been unlocked. Jawhn literally says when he’s taking to Spidey “I’ve given him so many chances to be better.” Because he has! He is always asking “Jonathan, help us find a cure, help us save these people, find Spidey, find hope.” And Jonathan, true to his own cowardice, refuses every advance. He can’t have hope. Hope means running the risk of losing it, and he can’t handle that pain for the millionth time. When suffering is all you’ve ever known, good things become terrifying. AND OH GOD DOES IT CAUSE CONFLICT BETWEEN THESE TWO. Literally every interaction they have feels like a constant fight. A fight that Jonathan is always trying to run from, as he has always done, and one that Jawhn is always trying to pursue, as he has always done. They both openly admit to disliking each other, and still they end up together strangely often.

Jawhn physically cannot give up on anything, especially Jonathan, who reminds him so much of the future he does not want for himself. And Jonathan physically cannot give a shit about anything, especially Jawhn and his stupid hope for a cure that reminds him so much of his younger self.

And the best part is… it’s kind of working. I don’t think Jawhn is the sole reason Jonathan is changing his ways, far from it. There are a LOT of factors at play in Jonathan’s character arc. But I think that Jawhn is sometimes the only person who will tell Jonathan exactly what he needs to hear. Because sometimes he needs to have it screamed in his face for it to get through. And sometimes Jawhn needs be reminded that what he says has any kind of impact, he needs be reminded that things can get better. That his hope is not totally misplaced. Because if Jonathan can change, then anyone can, right?

I truly do not think that these two will ever be able to form a healthy or loving relationship with each other, I actually really hope they don’t, but I think that there is something positive to be gained from their constant conflict. I hope they continue to challenge each other, and maybe, someday, become better because of it. I hope they both get their happy endings far, far away from each other. Because the thing that brings them together is suffering and the need to be free of it, and when they are free of suffering, they will therefore be free of each other.

First of all she’s so unbelievably fun and so silly,, I love badass apocalypse granny with a katana <3

Also the whole scene in the church where they were like “maybe a I would’ve stood on the altar … with someone … but I don’t remember anymore” or smth like that was heartbreaking

I did not expect to be hit with a brick after a whole bunch of silly but the brick was welcomed tbh I love the lore drop

Also I love her friendship with Zora <3

She’s so concerned for her well being and she clearly knows her well, judging by the fact she knows that she’s stronger than she seems and that she’s kinda unhinged

I absolutely love the idea of Zora wanting to kill everyone except for Squiddo lol

The besties <3

Also them slipping Zora a knife when they thought she was in danger?? Squiddo you are so kind 😭 and on top of that, even though they knew 4C was infected she still wanted to find him to keep him safe in his final moments :(

I loved all her other interactions with everyone too,,,, the ending with everyone in the plane together was also nice!!

It felt like a little moment of peace after such a lore heavy session :)