now those are some fireworks

I be like ''lord'' ''god'' ''jesus christ'' and the mfs dont even mean anything to me

The secret to a peaceful tumblr experience is that every once in a while you gotta be deeply fucking cringe on main so only the strong will keep following you.

I don’t think dandelions are weeds. I think dandelions are free flowers that four year olds can pick for their mommies

mental illness made me so desperate for joy that i forgot it was this simple… feeling the ocean against your skin… a really good guitar riff… sun on your back… holding the door for a stranger… a cold shower on a hot day…….. the world is like a cradle and i am just a little baby. eyes wide open there is so much to see

*guy who hasn't eaten lunch voice* been really into the idea of picking a direction and running as fast as I can in a straight line until I collapse and die

listen i have not read homestuck. i will never read homestuck and i keep a poison pill in a fake tooth in case i am ever in a situation where i might have to read homestuck. but i think vriska deserves to win the tumblr girl poll

i did not spend the past eight years of my life fighting off demons bare handed in order to not learn anything about vriska just for you guys to hand this poll to someone who is not vriska. katya goncharov could never have done that to me

my favorite trope is when someone believes they’re hard to love and someone who loves them like it’s breathing.

I think my favorite jokes are the ones that weren’t even all that funny until I was an adult, and now they’re fucking hilarious. I’m not even talking about the dirty jokes. I’m talking about in Finding Nemo where the sharks are having fucking AA for fish eating. Remember that shit? “I am a nice shark, not a mindless eating machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself.” Who ever thought of that? That was brilliant. Or what about that time in Shrek 2 where Shrek and Donkey infiltrate the castle pretending to be union workers? Little me didn’t give a shit about unions but big me is remembering Shrek going “It’s okay buddy, we’re from the union” and the desk worker secretively “we don’t even have dental,” and Shrek just shakes his head and looks at Donkey like he can’t believe this shit and goes, “They don’t even have dental.” What the fuck. I’m dying of laughter. Who comes up with this shit.

Dirty jokes have their place but I kind of wish more “adult” jokes relied on “Things only adults would understand due to lack of life experience,” instead of “Things that are inappropriate for kids,”