upon this ass of thine i'll set my hand

job interviewer: would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for nothing?

job interviewer: (reading the room) would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for a pizza party?

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.

ngl having opinions on classic lit is intimidating because people have been studying these books for like one william years and i'm over here on tumblr instead of making sure i don't get kicked out of school. but also who cares here is ivan karamazov's fursona

you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for an amazing reason

well what can i say. i will like all characters better if theyre women instead of men

went to the beach ten minutes after an actual thunderstorm and got so cold i started coming up with a “fish” cover of creep by Radiohead which I was singing out loud over and over again. imagine me waist deep in the waves no feeling in my legs getting over a cold voice singing “i wish i was urchin. you’re so fucking urchin”

blonde people are so scary why cant u have a normal hair color like black or brown or green or green

Every once in a while, I wish the friendship meter from the Sims was real so that way when people tell me "I used Chat-GPT" they can visually see just how much respect I just lost for them in that moment.

One time an acquaintance told me she entered Snape's star chart into chatgpt and I could physically feel that meter dropping three separate times over the course of her sentence

the highwaisted breeches and loosely-tucked white shirt, possibly with sword belt attached, is THe hottest look available to any single human (or other), and i would be the lustiest harlot in regency England had i existed when it was À La Mode

They found the last golden ticket . So that’s just it then . Fuck my stupid horrible pathetic life. Cabbage soup for dinner again , my stupid mothtsr. Grandpa Joe said he’s sorry but I know he doesn’t really give a fuck . And who gives a fuck about the other three old people in my house . Whatever their names is. Fuck fuck fuck it’s all worthless . They even made fun of me at school for only buying like 3 wonka bars. Nepo pricks . Fuck my stupid life it’s all fucked it’s all fucked . And my last name is bucket

"unbecoming" is such a great word. bro that shit was so rude you no longer Are