Mr Dude

I think venus flytraps should be intelligent and ambulatory. I think they should get into the cupboards. I think they should purr when you pet them.

OP there is an entire Broadway musical explaining why you don’t want that

There’s gotta be a better way to learn about things than Broadway musicals.

The thing about being trans is that once you come to terms with it it’s really just whatever but The Cis People insist upon being weird about it

Once you’ve been out of the closet for a while and are surrounded by people who are at the very least neutral and respectful about the trans thing it just becomes a whatever part of your life and all these people claiming that you’re ruining society and passing laws against you kinda feels like a swat team storming into your house while you’re just eating spaghetti.

Bro why are you banning me from using the bathroom I’m literally just eating spaghetti

No I’m not eating spaghetti in the bathroom. I’m eating spaghetti in a normal spaghetti location and they’re banning me from the bathroom anyways.

it's been incredibly freeing to realize that i'm entitled to never having to come up with anything original ever again because i already made cookie clicker and i can be satisfied with that. sorry this isn't meant to be relatable the rest of y'all still gotta try

"hey orteil you posted a joke but someone else already made that post like a month ago" don't care. popularized a game genre

flirting w him on one tab n watching a video essay about every major war crime committed in ww2 on another tab

guy who has a mental health condition that comes and goes: i’m cured this time actually i can feel it

same guy when they start having symptoms again: what the fuck is happening and why

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of her penis.

your muscles being pleasantly sore after exercise is such a nice incentive I can see why they patched that in. the forced regular logins to avoid losing progress however are a predatory practice and deserve nothing but scorn.