Fallout New Nobody

god damn the idiot makes me crazy insane. what if you were kind hearted and you just wanted the best for everyone you met and you often put the needs of others before your own and you only ever wanted to make everyone around you happy and you had the best intentions and then everything backfires and everyone is worse off for it and your being there only ruined everything despite you being so kind and gentle and doing your best to make everyone happy. even because you did your best to make everyone happy you inadvertantly ruined everything. what if

anyway yes! it makes me sound full of myself and like a bit of a dick to say "oh im just like prince myshkin hes me etc" and yeah maybe it is a little bit. but dont fucking forget he ruined the lives of everyone he touched just completely fucked up their lives just by being in it. and dont you fuckin forget it. he fucked it up. all of it. and he is me

we don't even have to have sex just pin me down and kiss me for thirty to forty minutes and i will be in heaven

Something so funny about rereading one's own unfinished fics. Like wow this is pretty good! Almost as if was written exactly according to what I personally like in fact! Someone should finish it!

can we make no nonsense women's underwear the norm and can we do it quickly because i am. sick and tired. of all the bullshit. what makes you think i want a stupid little lace trim on it. WHY is there a fucking bow on it. a bow?? if a man goes underwear shopping he (rightfully!) expects to find something comfortable and durable so why shouldn't that be the norm for us? if he wants to get himself a pair of frilly fucking panties he's gonna have to look for them because it makes no fucking sense for it to be the norm so why is it for us?? can we fucking cut the crap already. it makes me disproportionately angry

Anyone remember Dumb Ways To Die. Like they really made a 3 minute long music video of cute cartoon characters killing themselves in humorously fucked up ways solely as an elaborate PSA about being safe around trains and then made a fucking series of mobile games based around it and we all just let them. Will kids today ever understand how fucking legendary that was. Will they ever know.

you’d be surprised at how many doctors will tell you that schizophrenics shouldn’t masturbate, have sexual fantasies or write/draw erotica, let alone date or have actual sex, because it “distracts them from recovery”, as if schizophrenia is a two week course of antibiotics and not a lifelong neurotype and disability

in general I notice this attitude in the schizophrenia and bipolar treatment community that people with these DXes are never allowed to do anything non-constructive that normal people can do in moderation, no alcohol, no caffeine, no thc, no going to late concerts or parties, no unplanned trips, no spontaneous situationships, not even junk food. the only thing we’re really allowed to partake in is nicotine, I assume because cigarettes and gum are good incentives for controlling our behavior. our lives have to be All Working On Ourselves, All The Time, because we have Erratic Crazy Person Who Can’t Make Their Own Decisions Disorder, and it’s an endless, thankless task because there’s no actual cure.

This is a named phenomenon, it's called the dignity of risk. Essentially, neurotypical and non-disabled people are allowed to make "bad" decisions. They're allowed to stay up late and drink too much and whatever else, even though those things could have negative impacts. However, people who aren't those things aren't afforded the ability to make "bad" decisions and do detrimental things. There's more to it than that but my shift is about to start, sorry.