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The fact that tech companies are allowed to act the way they do is so baffling compared to literally any other business model ever. Like, imagine if you went to the grocery store but every time you reached for an item, an employee rushed out of nowhere and snapped a rat trap on your fingers. And when you got to the counter, they proudly informed you that for just $12.99 a month, you too could get the rat trap-free grocery store experience. Shouldn't I have that anyway? Or they just looked at you like you had three heads and told you to shop at another store if you didn't like the rat traps breaking your fingers. Am I crazy?

And then you ask a buddy to go with you to the store with the sole purpose of simply blocking this guy. And the store then tries to lock the door in your face, claiming that this violates their company policy and that preventing it counts as stealing.

used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic

working at girl scouts is great because you'll be talking about all the HR violations committed by your old boss Peanut Butter

a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours

people will say “they’re only friends” and then show me two people who would crawl through broken glass to hear the other laugh once. two people who have memorized each other’s coffee orders, fears, childhood stories, and emergency contacts. two people who would haunt each other’s houses as ghosts. be serious.

Just an FYI—the original intention of this post was to challenge the way people say only friends, as though friendship is somehow lesser than other forms of love. As if being deeply known, cherished, and chosen by another person could ever be a small thing. Normalize profound platonic love. Some of the most fulfilling, transformative, and enduring relationships we will ever have are friendships. 🫶🏼

did laundry and showered today you knowwwww i'm hitting that clean sheets clean jammies clean me trifecta tonight

bro im bedcelled. im comfypilled. im literally cozymaxxing.

​honkpilled shoomaxxer

straight up "snorkin' it". and by "it" haha, well. let's just say. mimimi

UNPOPULAR OPINION: A lot of "mental health issues" disappear when bills are paid, rent is secure, and the fridge is full. Peace is expensive. And pretending money doesn't affect mental health is privilege.

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

“I don’t put politics in my stories” is the literary equivalent of a cishet guy going “I don’t have pronouns”

the thing about being "good with kids" is all it takes is literally just not trying to control and mould them with every interaction. it's just being a normal person and engaging with them through normal interactions like having conversations and playing games. it's just being genuine and friendly and not perceiving them as lumps of wet clay you are there to shape. "oh you're so good with kids" thanks it's because I think they are people

they should make a Getting Out of Bed that doesn’t take an hour

dead tired today so I grabbed a coffee from the gas station & the guy greeted me by trying to say “is that everything “ but fumbled and said “e ga thebythin” and me trying to say “yeah” or “yup” just went “YIP!” in response. No survivors