xoxo

"next time, log in faster with fingerprint/face/iris recognition!" how about i keep typing my password like i have for the past 25 years and you fuck off

Achilles wouldn’t have died if he was wearing OSHA approved work boots.

Don’t let workplace safety be YOUR Achilles heel.

first thing id do as a skeleton is drink red wine from a goblet and have it spill out everywhere . second thing id do is play my ribs like a xylophone

Best part of this Game Changer episode way Kaylin sounding like she was being held at gunpoint every time she had to describe the drawings

meanwhile brennan sounded like he was holding someone else at gunpoint

like 2 years ago there was the trend of "rawdogging flights" and during dinner my dad (very online) (non-native english speaker) was like "oscar have you heard of rawdogging" and i said "um. what?" and he went "they're doing it on planes"

i support women's wrongs

You know how much I would lose my mind if I was at an aquarium and turned a corner to see a wild ass heron staring at a fish tank