“everyone is mad at me and they just won’t tell me” —> “no one has said anything about being mad at me and i haven’t done anything to warrant being mad at so if someone is silently fuming about me and not saying anything that’s their problem and actually quite weird of them and i can effortlessly move on with my life”

this took SUCH a huge deal of unlearning because, like so many of you, i came out of a home where being quietly in trouble WAS the default state, and i DID grow up not just with the assumption but borderline religious conviction that Everyone Is Mad At Me, I Am Bad, I Must Exist In A Constant State of Attempting to Pacify The Natural Rage I Inspire In Everyone. and no it actually turns out that my family are the freaks . and yours are too

let me get what I want please please please

wait. turns out that sometimes even when I get what I want it’s not enough

i love that it’s a carefully worded, well-written, non-inflammatory answer too. which asker wouldn’t know because they won’t read it. i love website

It will leave you happier and more at peace if you stop trying to monitor and control other people's behaviour online. In an indefinitely large open space like Tumblr, it is simply not possible to have community standards, because you are, in fact, not in a real community with almost any of the people you encounter on this website. There are potentially upwards of a million people on Tumblr alone, and it is a completely porous space, the idea that we are any kind of coherent group is nonsense. On the same point, the idea that any random selection of people who happen to share an interest, fandom, or hobby in a large open space like this make up any kind of real community is also nonsense. The more you can focus on the actual, individual people you interact with online, the people it is possible for you to know and care about, and not trouble yourself with the behaviour of strangers, the more mentally free you'll be (by all means study other people like bugs, though.)