eyes wide open

smoked the weed that gives you gothic madness and now i'm on the fucking moors again wearing nothing but a flimsy shift 😑

I love when cats get a claw stuck in your clothes and then act like it's YOUR fault. lil bro I'm literally just clad in garments you're the one with your terror toes deployed

forgive and forget? wrong. charged two-handed heavy attack with my greatsword of resentment

If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'

okay. rude.

you cant be making hand gestures like that white baby

did u know that sesame street did columbo parodies where he is a sheep and his name is colambo

The same brand selling free-range, cage-free and cage eggs is really funny both because it's so revealing of the illusion of free consumer choice but also because it implies fuck some chickens in particular