write this in the sky

cherry  wasn't  a  stranger  to  the  lincoln  city  carnival  ,  never  leaving  town  had  its  perks  .  she  would  usually  come  ,  go  on  rides  ,  get  drunk  …  occasionally  hook  up  with  one  of  the  vendors  or  someone  at  a  bar  before  disappearing  .  this  time  though  ,  she  hadn't  wanted  to  attend  ,  choosing  to  stage  a  protest  against  everyone  who  had  came  back  by  not  rearing  her  ugly  ,  bitter  face  .  that  had  all  changed  with  the  message  …  she  knew  that  it  wasn't  an  option  .  as  much  as  she  claimed  not  to  give  a  shit  about  anything  ,  she  wanted  this  to  all  be  over  with  ,  convincing  herself  that  her  compliance  would  help  as  a  means  to  an  end  .  she  was  dishevelled  ,  climbing  out  of  her  step  fathers  car  who  had  kindly  given  her  a  ride  with  a  look  of  concern  .  barely  makes  it  out  of  the  heightened  door  ,  strap  yanked  back  onto  her  shoulder  and  day  old  makeup  still  on  .  "  guess  you  got  the  vip  invite  too  ,  "  she  mutters  to  the  person  closest  to  her  ,  even  if  the  message  wasn't  exactly  that  .  

she finds the whole thing pretty coincidental that a few of them stayed back and had everything going just fine (as fine as it can be) in their lives but when people that came back to town, suddenly they weren't getting a vibes. as if it's 2010 again and they got pulled into pretty little liars. just because there's a spin off, it doesn't mean that they have to be in that crazy universe too. still, something tells her that this night isn't going to end well. but dion just brushed it off when she eyes a vender who's selling alcoholic drink which is something she desperately needs right now. "what's a vip invite without having a drink? first's on me?"

@classcursestarters

there was no way dion was going to go to another event fucking sober, she knew better to drink off the bat but being high? well, no one is gonna notice when she's just a little too happy to be around so many people. so by the time she bumped into vivian, she knew how to test her limit. it was clear to her that the second those words came out of the other's mouth she had no choice but to push. "there's no time to prepare like the present, let's get you're ass up there." she held vivian's hand as she pulled them into the line. "if you wait for the right time, you'll be waiting forever and it's better to just get it over with so you don't spend all night thinking about it."

            talking  about  chris  wasn't  really  something  kai  enjoyed  or  entertained  much  .  which  was  𝐃𝐈𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐔𝐋𝐓  lately  due  to  how  much  he  was  being  brought  up  .          (      or  the  past  was  being  brought  up  .     )        it  made  it  𝐀𝐋𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓  impossible  to  get  away  from  .  kai's  tactics  of  running  away  from  the  memories  that  burned  into  his  brain  . . .  and  anything  that  had  to  do  with  it  or  his  missing  brother  was  going  horrible  as  of  lately  .          ⏤         taking  his  glass  in  his  hand  ,  kai  couldn't  help  but  roll  his  eyes  slightly  at  the  comment  before  bringing  the  dirnk  up  to  his  lips  and  shotting  it  completely  back  .  downing  all  the  remaining  contents  from  the  class  before  setting  it  back  down  on  the  table  ,  now  empty  .         ❛     can't  live  with  'em  ,  can't  live  without  'em  .  or  whatever  fucking  bullshit  people  spew  on  about  .     ❜           he  spoke  ,  an  unamused  tone  in  his  voice  .  not  that  he  was  disinterested  in  dion  or  her  company  but  the  subject  was  something  he  𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘  wasn't  into  .         ❛     let's  get  the  fuck  outta  here  .     ❜       the  male  offered  .

the only person she thought really understood her was kai. he was someone that was even more close to chris and still couldn't stand the news going around town. it was like an itch that wouldn't go away. that's what it felt like and it was happening all over again. she knew it was a bad idea, everything was fine. it wasn't great but it wasn't horrible and now she found herself being pulled away from zeppelin and the things she actually cared about. now her days are just filled with trying to forget. "thank god, i was wondering how much longer we had to suffer in this place before it felt like the walls were caving in."

        hestia loves a good excuse  to drink.  well,  she'll do it regardless of having an excuse or not  -  but the woman considers having an excuse quite nice.  one less thing to think about,  a way to focus on her job.  yeah,  that's what hestia will call it.   "that would be due to small town's having one  tragic  thing happening, and running with it until it inevitably becomes a ghost town."   in fact,  she better tuck that line away in her head and save if for when she actually starts writing the article  -  because what a  hook of a starter  would it be.   "i think i'd prefer the latter."   tilts the shot glass against the others,  taps it the brunette's.   "i take it you're not too thrilled to be here either?"

drinking with hestia was a blessing. she knew there was no judgement or stress, she could always count on the other to be on the same level at her. the vibe was just there and she had no worries about having to keep up an appearance. "see, this is why i need you around, that makes so much sense. i can't fucking wait until this place is dead enough that i don't even second guess about leaving again." dion thought about it, the fact that she made herself set back into the pass was starting to eat her up. "i'm not to thrilled about anything really. i think i'm just getting bored. i need something fun to do, something that isn't drinking but being high is definitely not off the table. maybe i should just start fucking anything that moves. that might make me feel better."

"  that's  what  i've  been  saying  ,  "  nick  is  quick  to  chime  in  whether  his  opinion  was  wanted  or  invited  .  he  had  the  luxury  of  feeling  no  guilt  about  the  evening  in  question  but  it  really  was  interesting  how  the  world  seemed  to  stop  over  this  new  evidence  .  dion  might  not  have  enjoyed  his  company  but  they  both  knew  each  other  well  …  if  someone  wanted  to  feel  diminished  responsibility  then  being  in  nick's  present  might  have  helped  absolve  them  .  

"jesus, it's like talking to a wall. i would've thought after graduation, you would've learned to form a complete sentence by now. but then again, maybe i should be thankful for that," dion says as she leans forward to dip her chip into the beef tartare before stuffing it into her mouth, at least this place had good food and good alcohol. "you know what, i'm too buzzed to care."

             nothing  was  going  according  to  plan  . . .          (     if  there  even  was  a  plan  .      )           but  everything  about  all  of  this  𝐃𝐈𝐃𝐍'𝐓  seem  like  the  quote  ,  unquote  plan  at  all  .  everything  seemingly  a  disaster  or  a  𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑  waiting  to  happen  .  zeppelin  was  unable  to  really  find  his  footing  or  peace  of  mind  with  everything  going  on  .  he  was  already  the  type  to  get  overwhelmed  but  with  everything  added  on  ,  with  their  pasts  seemingly  𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑  leaving  them  alone  . . .  zeppelin  didn't  know  what  to  do  with  himself  .          ⏤           setting  his  guitar  down  ,  zeppelin  stood  up  and  brushed  his  fingers  through  the  front  of  his  hair  before  pacing  a  bit  back  and  forth  .  finally  ,  he  took  a  breath  and  took  a  moment  to  sit  back  down  .  turning  to  look  over  at  dion  .           ❛       i  just  wanted  everything  to  go  back  to  how  it  was  before  . . .  when  none  of  this  was  on  anyone's  radar  anymore  . . .     ❜  

dion had formed a horrible habit of picking at the skin on her cuticles. she had ruined them to the point where she had to stop getting her nails done in order to not get strange looks. now, it's pushed so far back and it's looks raw enough to bleed. when zeppelin stands up, she forces herself to sit on her hand so watch him pace the room. she can't help but feel stuck at his words. a part of her can't help but feel like going back might be worst than what it is. now she has kai and zeppelin and even then it doesn't even feel like way. "i'm just ready for them to close the case again. i understand that it would probably put chris's family at ease but it's opening up old wounds if they don't find answers."

somewhere twisted in the selfishness of vivian’s heart is a glint of relief that dion is so callously able to vocalize all the frustrations that vivian has no courage to say out loud . god , yes , it is fucked up . its fucked up how chris' disappearance dragged each and every one of them through the mud of trauma and guilt . it’s fucked up that his death is like an iron shackle heavy on their ankles and the only one with the key is chris . it’s all so fucked up . . . so so fucked . . . and yet . . . she can’t help but wonder if their collective grief , the very grief that pulled their innocence right from under their feet , was faulted to none other than themselves . vivian doesn’t have an answer to the thoughts that bubble inside of her head , she just hangs onto every word that dion says as though it were spun of gold . “ we don't have a say in this . . . not after we— ” the whispered words die in her mouth just as fast as they tried to escape now that she’s become lucid in her drunkenness , brown eyes losing its jagged edge , lowering almost in shame . “ i’m not deciding anything for you . ” she says with a touch of finality , her fingers swiping at the wetness lingering on the rim of the glass . “ but if that's how you feel , so be it . just know that . . . this is the burden we chose to carry and you know it . chris being at the center of attention is only fair . ” vivian slowly starts gathering her belongings before shooting the other a small smile , knowing full well that her energy has just been thoroughly drained at the sore topic of an old friend . " and just so you know , i never once felt obligated to spend time with you . " with a slight struggle , she finally stands tall on her foal like knees , chin jutting towards the exit . " i'm going to the convenience store . all this . . . depressing tequila talk got me in the mood for ice cream . and a buzzball . come with ? "

she's not sure what it is about vivian but she just wants to press all the other girls button just to see her go off. it yell, to fight, to do anything but make dion feel worse. "do not even do that," she scoffs as she opens up her wallet to drop a few bills down on the table, taking one last shot before getting off the stool and onto her feet. moving close to the brunette. "i don't fucking care what's fair or not. it's been ten fucking years, v. i say, we all get a pass for keeping our mouths shut this long." whoever wrote that note should be thanking them because all this did was make her feel like chris is out there doing better than any of them. it's so fucking draining that she doesn't even had the energy to argue with vivian, it is depressing. "fine, but you're buying and no talks of chris or the police or interview. i'm sick enough having to go through that shit today." dion makes her way out the door, amazed that she can even walk straight in heels. "so what's not depressing in your life, right now?"

the past reminds vivian of a sweltering summer's day . . . no matter how much someone tries to escape it , the heat is unforgiving . vivian realized that much since returning to the home of her past where every crevice of the city reminded her of something she couldn't seem to escape . in nights like these , when the weather felt impermeable and her memories blistering , vivian found solace in a drink . even though she is ten years older , she is none the wiser in the face of something she's not accustomed to . it wasn't until dion came along with a whirlwind of shots that she finally began to feel lighter , more like the self that screamed to breathe . and everything was fine . . . until it wasn't . dion's remark pulled at the scabs of a decade old wound that no degree of hers could fix . vivian was hopeful , but she was no fool . . . she knew chris was dead . . . she saw him in her dreams , swept away by the stream like a sunken rock , forever tumbling , wrapped in the moss of time and regret . vivian knew he was dead , but it was something she refused to speak into existence . it felt safer to believe he disappeared . . . it meant he might be someplace , somewhere . . . lost . alive . " you're not serious , right ? " her mouth was slick with the taste of liquor and beer , tongue all but restrained . " i mean . . in what world do you think it's okay to say that ? " she drawls out , the drunken glint in her eyes dulled by the mention of death and chris in the same sentence . " don't you think that's . . . " fucked up . " too much ? "

dion forgets that she can't full joke about death to certain people anymore. of course, she wasn't serious. of course, she's not okay. of course, life would be easier if their past wasn't fucking around with them to the point where they oddly have to lean on people that they never had to before. of course, she's ready for this shit show that is christopher wilder haunting them for the rest of their lives to be over. "no, i don't think it's too fucked up, what's fucked up is that we have to live with this shit. we have to go through all this. again. when it's been taking some of us years to even try to get to a new normal." she take her shot, dion has learn to be used to the burn to the point where it feels better than the other type of pain that she feels. "if you're gonna sit around and decide that what i'm feeling is too harsh, you can leave. i'm not tying you down to spend time with me."

an  eye  roll  as  reception  was  enough  acknowledgment  for  him  ,  dark  eyes  scouring  to  find  the  girl  whispering  beneath  her  breath  into  the  glass  of  champagne  .  as  he  parts  ways  with  the  parents  of  the  future  ,  adjusting  the  cuff  of  his  shirt  as  he  lingers  thoughtfully  ,  "  now  dion  ,  there's  no  need  to  be  bitter  .  i  can't  help  it  that  i  have  such  a  dazzling  personality  and  endless  charm  .  the  people  love  me  ,  "  unironically  speaking  ,  he  wasn't  wrong  ,  his  nature  as  a  social  chameleon  making  those  who  didn't  look  closely  forget  what  he  was  capable  of  . 

looking back now, she had no idea she spend so much time with him when all she felt was unhappy. even the perfect image thing didn't stick that long and she wasted her good years on him. jesus, if there weren't a room full of people she would love nothing more than to lose her mind on him and then smack that smug look on his face. "what would i even bitter from? i'm not saying the other stuff is true because it's not but if they knew the real you i bet they would rather watch paint dry." dion wanted nothing more than to tell everyone what a complete ass he was but she's just trying to get through the night.