*holds up my ocs* baby simba

“Your days are numbered” yeah it’s called a calendar you fucking idiot.

foraging for a fuckberry to give

When you get mad, take a deep breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. No one ever expects that.

you ever crave something you can't have? ssssshut up about your ex i mean i want grilled cheese but im scared of the stove

swearing eternal fealty to a bug I found

hey thanks for calling me your "loyal knight" now i'm horny enough to win any battle

theyre taking me out back behind the shed presumably to give me a medal for my valor and heroism

the lonely idgafer starts giving a fuck late at night

someone is putting up pictures of me around town and they all say I’m ‘wanted’. which is nice