live laugh lasagna

squidward hospitalized for covid and they put him in the squid ward. the nurse is always coming at him, she’s always moving squidward. he can’t escape the room, they got a witch to put up a squid ward. he belongs to the hospital now, they’re calling him their squid ward.

it’s crazy how a double bacon cheeseburger is probably the single healthiest thing a human can eat

This princess forgot about super glue

sorry i am a dumb bitch

*clears throat* Hey my friends, I attended a bee wedding this past weekend. I bet you would like to know how was it.

How was it?

You had two bee there

Been really getting into something called doing whatever I want lately

Turns out some people really hate when you do this

at this point i wish i could obliterate harry potter from cultural consciousness i hate hearing positive and even neutral references to it. find a new thing

your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

thats not how they told it

you never think too hard abt having an apple but then you see one and think "hm i haven't had one in a long time" and then you take a bite on a whim and it's like fuuck wait this awesome #myapple. and then when you're done you'll forget about the appleful joy because it's the only way it can be experienced again

duuude is that a losing dog? *gets out my wallet*

Reminder that spring will always come back, music will never stop being created, and there are still so many books left to read! You’re alive! You’re alive! You’re alive!