lord, send me a mechanic if i'm not beyond repair

ant heaven is real and it looks just like any other ant mound to us but in reality it’s made out of dark brown sugar and the ants are SO happy inside

leering roommate who's been very clearly trying to set up a "you have to wear a cowkini around the apartment for a week" type pervert wager every time you get drunk together for at this point months but is simply and i mean really truly Absolutely Dogshit at playing poker

completely sober in the club dressed in the raiment of the torturers guild

I bet it feels so good to use all the allotted time for an assignment (of whatever kind in life and work and school) to chip away at it in healthy, manageable portions day by day and finish it comfortably and confidently with time to spare

John McAfee was kind of a disco elysium character

to clarify, elf gf is erect because she had intended to get her dick sucked, but was sidetracked by my lamenting the destruction of kakashi's innocence. she is not enjoying this

the postal service names their shit exactly like how a 16 y.o. names angsty fanfic

today is the last saturday of 2012. reblog now or go @#!*% yourself because you won't get this chance ever again.

I don't think I've ever seen an artist misunderstand their own work's target audience quite so starkly as David Firth finding it implausible that a woman would want to fuck Salad Fingers.

watching my promised afternoon thunderstorm slip from a 90% chance to a 20% chance.... baby come back i can change