Too hot and too cold LET ME OUT

I FUCKING LOVE INFORMATION!!! I WANT TO LEARN EVERYTHING AND KNOW EVERYTHING!!!!! I WANT TO UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING ABOUT LIFE, THE UNIVERSE, AND EVERYTHING!!!!!! I AM UTTERLY CONSUMED BY MY THIRST FOR KNOWLEDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tried distracting a vampire by throwing rice at him, but I only had two grains with me so it didn't work. He counted them instantly. Then he asked me what I was even doing with exactly two grains of rice, and I explained how a bowl of rice tastes better if you spread it out over an entire day. I asked him if he was gonna suck my blood but he said no, he just had a lot more questions about the rice thing.

Do it scared but please don't do it hungry. Please don't do it dehydrated. It's gonna make it so much scarier. Please.

(voice of a person spiralling) its embarrassing but i still havent figured out if its ok for me to be alive

its ok, even great. i love you for being alive

living under a rock is so fun i love watching a movie that’s been famous for decades and being like wow this is so good.. did you guys know about this

It deeply saddens me that "pdf file" has become slang for pedo. Don't you dare disrespect my wife the beautiful portable document format ever again

and to the children in the notes saying we need this fucking baby talk to get around censorship online; there's been no credible evidence that any site other that YouTube (which will only demonetize your video, ftr) will actually censor or hide content that include words like rape, pedophile, gun, terrorist, etc. etc. and even if we take as a given they were (which, again, they are not), do not fucking comply in advance, you absolute fucking coward. and ESPECIALLY do not comply by altering your real life fucking vocabulary. don't let the technocrats dictate what words you say holy fucking shit dude!!!!!!!!!!!!

Additional reminder that this kind of self censorship makes it harder for people to block content they do not want to see.

No reason why the next Overwatch character can’t be a Greek Orthodox priest

this post is so important

do you want to play dead bodies with me

floats along your dash face down and quiet and cold

They grow grants there like rhubarb

it’s still so wild that I managed to find my mom’s lost cat. but also, hyper obsessive autists get things done!!!! every single morning for months, I would check a series of local facebook groups, until finally she got spotted in a campsite. then from the time I saw that post, it took about 24 hours to organize her retrieval. and now she’s back to being a house cat! after being lost in the woods all spring and all summer! death via coyote is canceled, she will live into her 20’s and be a pivotal memory for my niece and nephew, who always ask on facetime to see her

let's put Scooby and the gang in a genuine horror movie situation, i wanna see what these freaks are truly capable of

"didn't they already do this with—" no. put them in a slasher film. put them in a BLOODBATH. put this van full of weirdoes in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre scenario i have FAITH in them