so the thing about Morrowind is that it's a game, at its heart, about uncertainty, self-determination, and the question of whether it's who you are or what you do that matters, whether you become a hero because you were destined to, or because you were the one that was there. there's a line of dialogue from Hasphat Antabolis, in the Balmora fighters' guild, that really just sums this up perfectly:
âCaius and I always argue over the role of the individual in history. Is the individual shaped and controlled by history? Or can an exceptional individual shape history? Are individuals carried in the stream? Or do they dam and divert the flow? I say Tiber Septim changed the world. Caius says that Tiber Septim was a product of his time, and if he hadnât lived, some other person would have served his function. What about you? Are you going to change the world? Or just be carried by the flow?â
but i'm not here to talk about that, because plenty of people already have. i'm just here to talk about my Nerevarine.
because the thing about Sirisare is that their entire story relies on certainty. on the absolute fact that they were, and are, Indoril Nerevar - not only reincarnated, not only in the ways that matter for the path of the Incarnate, but in all ways. a slightly changed personality, yes, but in all ways that matter, including metaphysically, this is the same man. Morrowind asks the question of which is more important, the incarnate or the mantle? which one are you, and can you even tell the difference? and Sirisare's answer to this is both.
his story is all about the painful cycle of tragedy. the way the mistakes of the past echo into the present. history is a mirror, and everything that happens to him is Nerevar's reflection. there's a point at which he literally cannot tell apart the dreams he's having of Nerevar's memories and the dreams Dagoth Ur is sending him to try to seduce him, because they feel functionally the same. so much of what he does is just chained to that cycle. like yes, the first third of the plot is functionally an ongoing identity crisis while they struggle to reconcile their own feelings with the increasing encroachment of the identity of Nerevar, but once the corprus knocks those memories fully loose, the path begins again.
and it really is reflected in everything. the pilgrimages to find his faith. proving himself and uniting the clans and the houses. Vivec asks him for nearly the exact same wording of an oath, when he gives Sirisare Wraithguard, as the oath he swore to Nerevar about using the Tools himself. in the same way that Nerevar went mad and tried to kill Ayem, resulting in the foul murder, Ayem goes mad, kills Seht, and turns on Sirisare, forcing him him to kill her. Voryn Dagoth is still under Red Mountain, bound by oath, gone mad and paranoid. everything that goes around, comes around.
but the difference here is that where Nerevar stumbled off his own path, the first time around, Sirisare doesn't. he tries to talk Ayem down - and fails, but he still tries, and it matters that he tried. he stands before Vehk and swears the same oath, and makes it very clear he will keep it, no matter what. he refuses to kill Voryn, or to be baited into killing him.
Nerevar was an unrealized Shezzarine, even standing before the Heart of Lorkhan; he just didn't know enough about esoterica to put it together. Sirisare realizes it. and in doing so, in picking up the potential they had in both lives, he changes fate - breaks the cycle, stops the tragedy before it can finish claiming their entire generation. he mantles Lorkhan (sort of. it's not really mantling if that's what you already are, but i digress) and he frees the Heart. he honors the blood of the tribe unmourned. he eats their sin, and is reborn.
and none of this, none of this works if he isn't not only the Nerevarine, but also Nerevar. because they are different things. my Vestige, Driyani, was a False Incarnate who made Nerevar's mistakes - but had Azura not set her on a different path, she could have been the Nerevarine anyway, false-made-true. the Nerevarine is a path. Nerevar is a mantle. but it was always going to be the Incarnate that took both of them, because the path was laid for him, thousands of years ago when he stepped off it to begin with. and this time the peace will last, this time things will be changed, this time he looks at the past and he chooses a better future.
and idk, i think that's really compelling. it's not a "do-over". it's atonement. you made these mistakes. now it's your responsibility to fix them.
here you are, in the same cycle your own actions created thousands of years ago, trapping everyone you loved in it with you. now prove yourself a Hero and a Prisoner and do something about it.
andulkaphoto
gracieabrams
yousharknotpass
origamiaround
ellievsbear
vaporwave
snowghoul
turnnoffyourmind
romaincrisis
