NEW HEAD NEW HEAD NEW HEAD NEW HEAD!
Cosimo Galluzzi
styofa doing anything
almost home
Peter Solarz

â
Xuebing Du
RMH
YOU ARE THE REASON
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Sade Olutola

ellievsbear
Not today Justin

Andulka
đŞź

çĽćĽ / Permanent Vacation
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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@darkmodepls
NEW HEAD NEW HEAD NEW HEAD NEW HEAD!

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The Art of Turning 30
âSo, am I allowed to talk?â Annabelle gave an awkward little laugh, that she immediately wanted to stuff back into her mouth. âIâve never done this before!â
âYou can talk.â Julian flashed her a quick, reassuring smile. âAt least until I tell you not to.â
They both laughed, then. Julianâs laugh was not awkward.
It was six months until her thirtieth birthday.
She had met him at her girlfriend Camilleâs twenty-ninth birthday party, a few weeks ago, only to be surprised that theyâd somehow never crossed paths before. London was big, but it wasnât that big surely, and Julian was an artist.
Annabelle felt like she spent half her free time at artsy bohemian parties and amateur gallery openings, though maybe that was why. He wasnât an amateur, was he?
Sheâd looked him up online after and seen several shining reviews of his first exhibition, and a rosy buzz of anticipation at what heâd do next.
She remembered that buzz. People used to get that buzz when they talked about her. Apparently, his work was âvisceralâ and âfelt startlingly aliveâ.
It seemed impossible that he wanted to paint her, of all people.
Annabelle shifted on the stool, glancing around Julianâs studio space as he finished setting up his easel and paints. Oils. Heâd said he was using oils. That mattered in painting, didnât it?
The studio was everything sheâd always imagined a professional artistâs studio to be. It was quite large, with clean wooden floors and white walls crowded with stacks of sheet-covered canvases in progress.
There was only one that was ready and visible; a painting of a beautiful blond man, probably nearing thirty too, lounging on the same stool that Annabelle was perched upon. He gazed out at the viewer with a hungry sort of hope. Like they were the best thing he had ever seen.
The studio smelled like drying paint and the sandalwood diffuser wafting its calming scent from the window sill. Sunlight coated the room like honey, or gold.
âYouâre not going to make me look ugly, are you?â she asked.
He smiled again, meeting her eyes. âI couldnât possibly.â
He probably flirted with all of his models, but she still felt a blush of heat rise to her face.
He looked like he could be in a painting, or one of those classical sculptures still concerned with archetypal ideals of beauty. Of course, she was with Camille, so nothing would happenâŚbut still. The attention made her heart pound. Camille was usually too tired from work to flirt with her anymore.
Annabelle wasnât sure how good sheâd be at seeing a painting of herself that she hated, and not letting it show on her face. Sheâd probably tear up. It would be embarrassing for both of them. She shifted on the stool once more, and tugged at the hem of her summer dress.
âThis is for your next exhibition?â
âI think Iâm going to call it âThe Art of Turning 30â.â
âExplains why Iâm your muse instead of some gorgeous twenty two year old ingenue.â She laughed again. He did not. She continued, even as she willed herself to stop babbling, because he wasnât looking at her with the expectation that she do anything. He plucked up a pencil, beginning his work. âItâs like, when youâre a woman, after you turn thirty your life is over, right? Itâs like with my acting. And then by the time youâre forty all of a sudden all you can possibly be is, like, a mother or a witch. Or, you know, the dead wife. Itâs all downhill.â
âYou wouldnât want to be a witch?â He raised a brow. âThey always seemed pretty powerful to me. I could see you as a witch.â
âBut do you know what I mean?â
âCan you turn your head a little the left, please?â
âWhat? Oh. Yes.â
She turned her head to the side, towards the window, and hoped the sunshine made her seem younger rather than highlighting every growing crag and wrinkle.
She could only watch him out of her periphery vision now; a wistful muse, seemingly unaware that she was being observed. She tried to look deep and mysterious.
âPerfect,â he said. âThanks. Youâre just perfect.â
The canvas of the blond man fell to the floor with a soft thump.
Annabelle jumped.
âSorry.â Julian shook his head, another easy laugh on his breath. âThe landlord never lets me put proper hangings on the wall here. Says it wrecks them. I guess so long as they donât do that at the exhibition?â
âI donât know, you could probably play it off as a stuntâŚlean into the photorealism.â
âNow, thereâs an idea. Genius.âÂ
She probably didnât look deep and mysterious. She probably just looked smitten.
At The Bottom
Little comic I made for my exam.
We need a Cabin in the Woods-esque meta horror movie about a small Hallmark Christmas movie town. Some one from that small town is visiting and she's confused as hell - she grew up in this dumphole, last time she was there it was a mess of poverty and drug use and crumbling infrastructure. She moved away to the city as soon as she could, but it's only been a few short years since she visited. Now? Every house has a perfect white picket fence, is decorated elaborately for Christmas, every family is smiling and cheerful, everyone is employed but specifically at cute little small shops that the protagonist didn't think can possibly be sustainable. Like, really, a whole store just for scented pinecones? And yet, Debbie who sells those pinecones has a four-bedroom house and her kids are all wearing the latest fashions. The town square has gone from a quiet half-empty tiny collection of buildings and is now a bustling and beautifully decorated sight to behold. Anyway the whole damn thing is some kind of holiday curse and the protagonist has to solve the mystery while avoiding the hunky man who exclusively sells reindeer-shaped cookies
BTW the protagonist WILL have a moment where she's like "maybe this isn't so bad, no one is starving on the street, we don't have endless corruption and drug use and streets we can't safely drive on... maybe I just... let it be" but then realizes people are being made to sort of "live through" holiday story stereotypes... she sees the local mailman finally BELIEVE in the SPIRIT of CHRISTMAS and as the music swells and he looks elated with his newfound belief, BAM, he DIES, because belief is what the curse feeds on and demands
Yes please! I think it might actually work even better without the easy answer of "the curse is secretly killing people". Everyone in town really is safe, and comfortable, and perfectly nicely happy all the time â they just aren't really people any more.
One of the first signs we get that something's off is Debbie's hobby of watercolour painting. She's got some of her art on display in her shop, and they're all perfectly nice pictures of flowers and puppies and kittens; a bit on the saccarine side perhaps, but nothing that'd strike you as odd about any of them. Not unless you happened across the closet full of all the complex, subtle, thought-provoking pieces of art she was creating up until last year.
And the pattern repeats everywhere: actions and incidents that look fine on the surface, but take on a much darker tone if you compare them in context.
"Hey, FormerClassmate, how's the activism going? I've always admired the way you survived your genuinely shitty childhood and dedicated your life to fighting for a more humane approach to addiction!" â"Oh, that. Well, the Christmas lights competition is really more important, don't you think? We need to keep standards high for the holidays!"
"Hey, ChildhoodFriend, I'm really sorry we've lost touch this past year. By the way, are you really going to buy a Christmas tree from Bob, after the shit he said when you came out?" â"Oh, that. No, Bob and I are actually getting married in a week; personal identity is all very well, but how could I miss out on a real, straight, Christmas romance?"
(Hey, Main Character, don't you have a loving, fulfilling relationship with your partner back in the city? Well, yes, but... haven't they been working lately? Wouldn't it just make so much more sense to find out the name of that farmer who picked up your books when you crashed into each other at the pine cone shop? Wouldn't you be happier if you just. Stay here.
with
To really bring out the existential horror, there should be one person that still acts normal.
He's not clean-shaven and dresses like a hobo, but he doesn't smell bad. The rest of the town grumbles about him being a Scrooge and scornfully tell the protagonist to keep her distance.
The protagonist witnesses him tear down the garlands in town square and decides she needs to talk with the one sane person left in town.
Together they investigate what's going on and take their frustration out on the Christmas displays when nobody is around.
They grow closer and closer, eventually being able to laugh at the ridiculous holiday wreath that keeps appearing on his door and getting tossed into the street every morning.
She feels herself falling for him and thinks back to how they met and how their relationship has progressed.
The way that they shared so many interests despite moving in completely different crowds before all this happened.
The sarcastic and playfully grumpy, but still generally cheerful demeanor that made him so fun to be around.
The silent streets and abandoned courtyards whenever the two of them decided to go destroy something, no matter the time of day.
He hands her a glass of wine with a gentle smile and empty, empty eyes.

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a match made in hell
snow's story
ash's story
i really do think that "let me in" is the most potently horrifying phrase ever conceived of. just let me in. that's all you have to do. just invite me inside. show me kindness. trust me. all you have to do is say yes. all you have to do is open the door. the rest is up to me. but you can trust me. have faith. you wouldn't leave me out here. you wouldn't turn away. not you. you aren't cruel. you're a good person. i can see that. i need your help. that's why i'm asking this of you. just let me in. let me in. let me in let me in letmeinletmeinletmein LET ME IN
The Princess can only be awoken from her slumber by her true love, but countless Princes have failed to do so. When a poor townsman is successful, the royals try to dispose of the man and convince the Princess that one of the Princes is her true love.
Youâve seen dead people before. Your family follows old paths â before and after. There have been hallowed eves where the door remains unlocked and the consequences come creeping down the hall to your room. You learned early that moving isnât an indicator of life â itâs an indicator of purpose and those two things are not synonymous. There are crucial things that mark the living, and even when the unliving pretend, they can never quite fool you.
Thatâs why you know the woman in the glass coffin isnât dead.
It still takes a long time to convince yourself to kiss her. Itâs beenâŚyears? Yes, it must have been years since you last saw those ruby red lips and that cloud of raven-black hair. Her eyelashes fan across her cheeks and thereâs a red rose carefully clasped between her still hands. Those hands once reached for you, accompanied by her sweet voice, inviting you to grab hold lest you stay trapped in the tunnel forever. The longer you stare, the easier it is to see her pulse in the basin of her throat and the shallow rise of her chest.
Of all the lands youâve traveled, there hasnât been a single one where kissing a sleeping woman on the lips was considered appropriate.
âYou can do this, Lexi,â you whisper. The trees over the glen murmur quiet agreement. Itâs nearing the end of golden hour â the next procession will be here soon. The fairytale lighting is the only thing keeping the worst of your anxiety away. Itâs like a dream this early in the morning. Only a dream. You twist your travel cap in your hands, squeezing your eyes tight. âYou can apologize after.â
When you open them, the first notes of birdsong pierce the air.
You drop your cap and grab the edge of the glass. Youâve always been slow to decide and quick to act. If you just keep moving, you wonât have to think about how she might be mad or offended or disgustedâ
You miscalculate the lid. Youâre a jack of all trades and you assumed something as expensive as a gilt glass coffin would have hinges. It doesnât. The lid slides off the edge of the platform. Your nails donât find purchase on glass, of course. Thereâre flowers scattered all around her resting place, thereâs a chance it wonâtâ
Crash!
The birdsong chokes off. A man yells from the woods behind you. Someone clicks and the pounding of hooves draws closer and closerâ
You swoop down and press your lips to hers. Theyâre cold and unyielding for one moment, two momentsâ
Then her mouth softens and you pull back as she gasps for air.
Breaking an enchantment feels a bit like falling through a frozen pond. Snow White breathes like a diver surfacing for air and then exhales a frost so bitter that it freezes the breath in your lungs. The spell she was under wasnât done by accident like youâd hoped. Thereâs malice in the bite of cold that lingers against your skin. You drink it down in painful sips, pulling the shroud from her aura until her eyes begin to flutter open.
You want to run. Youâve whispered enough twinkling knowledge to her that sheâll know what you did to free her. There are only two antidotes in the world and you whispered their recipes to her over and over until she could recite them from memory. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, about to leave her in a prickling castle with that thing for a stepmotherâ
You donât run. Youâve done that all over the world to see every sight you ever dreamed of. Only when one wonder remained in your heart did you finally return to see it.
Come on, darling. Show me what Iâve been dreaming of. Then punch me in the face.
Snow White breathes. Her eyelashes quiver. Her lips close and then part. Is she saying your name? You lean close. LeâLeâ
The world plunges into darkness. At the same time, the smell of onions fills your nose. Fuck. Youâve been trapped in enough produce bags to know whatâs happened. Your hands fly up to the mouth of the bag thatâs been thrown over your head, and you wedge your fingers between it and your neck just in time before the villain behind you cinches it too tightly. Thatâs the only reason you donât suffocate as rough hands yank you away from Snow White and throw you onto a hard, wooden surface.
âTake her back to the castle,â a man growls.
Another asks, âThe castle? Wouldnât it be better if she gets lost in the woods--?â
âWhat happened the last time you let someone get lost in the woods, Huntsman?â
ââŚyes, sir.â
The Huntsman. His name is the only thing that stills the syllables twisting between your teeth. You chew them as the cart lurches into motion. How is he still alive?
You imagined Snow White would have taken care of him already.
----.
The children of your family often get swept away in stories. All the ancient knowledge is heavy against the thin crucible of a babyâs mind â itâs not uncommon to hear of a cousin or sibling dissolving between dusk and dawn.
So thatâs what youâre doing the eve you turn twelve after learning about the razor edge between night and abyss. Youâre dissolving. The night drips like syrup from your ears and abyss flows out from between your lips in thin rivulets. Your eyes are trained on the stars as you stagger through the woods, pulled and spun around by the knowledge your brain canât quite accept.
(Like a lunatic, you will one day say fondly. Foaming at the mouth.
Like a fairy, she will correct. A long pause. A rather messy one.)
The little girl crouched between tree roots is the only thing that doesnât run when you lurch into the clearing. Sheâs wearing a silver nightgown that catches every bit of the moonâs light but still doesnât compare to the radiance of her face. Itâs shocking enough that you stop and let your head fall onto your shoulder so your eyes can fix on her rather than the sky.
âI think I should eat you,â you say in a language you donât remember learning. âBoth nights and abysses eat stars.â
âStars chew through both,â the little girl says. For cowering alone in the woods, she doesnât sound very afraid. Her voice is strident. Confident. âAnd even if it were true, little girls donât eat other little girls.â
Your eyes fix on hers. (Theyâre a beautiful deep b--) âIs that what I am?â
âYes,â she says. She scoots over so there is room in the cocoon of her roots for another body. âLittle girls are afraid of the dark.â
Itâs easier to sew yourself together with the echo of her voice ringing in your ears. Youâre young, a child, a girl. You might even be afraid of the dark, though she doesnât sound very sure of that point. You gingerly pick your way through puddles of mud and brambles to wedge yourself between the roots. Her body is cold against yours. How long has she been out here?
âDid you run away from home?â she asks.
You shrug.
âI did,â she says. Without asking, she tucks her cold fingers under your arm, hugging the appendage to herself like one would a teddy bear. âMy father married a woman who hates me.â
âWhy did he do that?â you ask.
âBecause heâs weak,â she says immediately. Her fingers wiggle as if sheâs counting on them. âToo weak to be alone. Too weak to rule alone. Weak to a pretty face. Weak in the face of death. Too weak to believe Iâll be fine when heâs gone.â
The part of you that might actually be a person is swimming to the surface. You examine how deep and warm your skin tone is against the paleness of hers. You know what itâs like to feel fabric and water, and heat on this skin. Now you also know what itâs like to feel the touch of someone close to hypothermia.
âTell me how youâll be fine,â you say.
And Snow White, who just needs someone to believe in her, tells you - someone who needs something to believe in- all about being a Princess in a castle after the first queenâs death.
âSomeday sheâll kill me,â Snow White says. âDad or me. One of us will be first.â
âHow will she do it?â you ask.
Snow White thinks for a long time. âPoison. Like she did with my mom.â
Youâre relieved. This is how you can help the girl who kept you from dissolving. âOh, thatâs easy. There are only two antidotes in the world, you know. Those derived from the World Tree or concocted to mimic it, orââ
-----.
True Loveâs Kiss.
In your cell, you cover your face with your hands. The worst part is that it doesnât have to be both parties in love â it can only just be one. Which is clearly you. Because youâre an idiot and thereâs no way Snow White would love you after you left her to face her stepmother alone. And then kissed her without permission.
âDo you mind waiting to off yourself until the execution?â the Huntsman asks. Heâs seated directly across from your cell, anxiously twirling a dagger between his hands. âIâll get in trouble otherwise.â
You ease your hands away from your neck. The half-moon imprints of your nails against your throat throb. âWhy are they even keeping me alive?â
âIn case you need to wake the Princess up again,â he says. He shrugs. âYou knowâŚsince one of the princes didnât do the trick.â
âThe princes?â A newspaper article you read several weeks ago comes to mind. Your lip curls. âOh, you mean the opportunists trying to claim the throne for themselves.â
âThe throne needs a ruler,â the Huntsman says simply.
The dungeon is drier than you imagined. You sit up into a cross-legged position and rub at the dust on the cobblestones. âThey have one. Snow White.â
âThe nobles arenât eager to have another solo ruler after the former Queen,â the Huntsman says. âMost think itâllâŚsmooth things out if one of the princes rules alongside her.â
You snort. âYou mean control her.â
The Huntsman inclines his head.
Theyâre all so stupid.
âWhy didnât you take her heart?â you ask. You remember that particular letter as if you read it yesterday; Snow White nonchalantly telling you all about how she escaped certain death by following the paths in the woods you taught her. Your nails draw divots in the cobblestone. âBack then.â
The Huntsman fumbles his dagger. It clatters to the ground and rings like a bell, over and over again. He stares at you for a long moment before he speaks through bloodless lips. âH-how did youââ
You stare at him.
He breathes in deeply. âI wouldnât have. I couldnât have. A young girlââ
You snort again.
ââthe daughter of the King I servedââ
You laugh. He wouldnât have taken her to the woods at all if that were true.
ââIâŚI wasâThat wasââ
âYouâre a hunter,â you say. You point to the dagger on the floor, and it lifts slowly, like a feather caught in an updraft. Heâs still and wide-eyed as you beckon it towards you. âYou donât carry a knife without the conviction to kill. You donât lure a young girl into the woods at night without the conviction to harm. You just donât. You do.â
The dagger falls into your palm with a slap.
The silence stretches.
The Huntsman breaks first.
âShe told me I was the villain,â the Huntsman says. He swallows audibly. The beard covering the lower half of his face does little to hide the tremble of his lips. âAlright? A 15-year-old girl told me that if I cut out her heart, I would be the villain for the rest of my life. She said that my daughter would hug me and know, that my wife would kiss me and know, that the brothers and sisters I fought alongside would meet my gaze and know. And IâIââ
You twirl the dagger, leaning back against the cold stone wall. âYou believed her.â
The Huntsman shudders. âShe said it and it was true.â
âBefore, when you were first ordered, it wasnât.â
âYes. Yes. It was just a job. But she looked at me with those cold eyes, those cold bââ
The dagger thuds into the wooden back of his chair, just an inch from his arm. His teeth click together. He stares at you like a startled horse, chest heaving and hands clenched around his knees so tightly you can hear the leather of his pants creak.
âWhy hasnât she killed you yet?â you ask.
To his credit, he doesnât feign confusion. Youâd wondered why he didnât react to how you levitated the dagger. Thereâs a knowing in his eyes.
âBecause I sent the letters,â he breathes. âI risked everything to send them.â
You pause. That made it sound likeâŚlike the letters were important. Your heart skips a beat. âJust for that? She let you live?â
When he nods, you swear you can hear birdsong.
----.
The first time Snow White asks about love, she doesnât ask the usual question.
âWhat would you do,â she starts carefully, âif you loved me?â
Youâre surprised enough to look up from your latest reading assignment. Your elders want you to know about the depths of caves after your latest expedition into them. You can feel your ears morphing the longer you read, lengthening and widening to better capture the echoes of sound from objects far away. It takes a moment to remember your human ears and, when you do, you ask, âPardon?â
Snow White watches you from where sheâs lounging on her bed. Her eyes are level on you, but you canât see much else. The rising sun is coming in from the window behind her, backlighting her so you can only see her like a shadow. âWhat would you do if you loved me?â
âUmâŚpanic?â
A flash and the sun crests the canopies of the forest. She asks in the same tone, âWhy?â
âBecause I donât know who I am,â you say, honest as always. At this age, youâre supposed to be keeping a diary that you study alongside your texts. Your elders tell you that is how your kind develops a personality. Your diary is Snow White. âYouâreâwell. I hope the person who falls in love with you is capable of supporting someone like you. Iâm tooâŚIâm floppy. Iâm not real. Not yet.â
Her breath is soft. âSo you donât love me.â
ââŚDo you want me to?â you ask.
âDo you want to?â
âYes,â you say. And then, âBut the person who loves you should beââ
âYou should go on your trip,â she interrupts. She stands and her silhouette is lined in gold. âNow.â
You splutter. Sheâd been against the pilgrimage your elders were trying to send you on. She said she needed you, she said she couldnât fight alone against her stepmotherâ
Snow White knows what youâre thinking. âYou can come back when youâve seen everything you want to see.â
âBut I donât want anythingââ
âWhen youâve seen it all, youâll come home,â she commands. Her voice rings like it did the night she declared little girls didnât eat other little girls. âUnderstood?â
And what could you do in the face of her conviction?
You leave the next morning.
---------------.
Snow White comes to get you on the seventh day. The Huntsman wonât meet your eyes anymore, choosing to spend his time huddled in the corner with his hands over his ears. Like a child afraid of the dark.
You savor the irony of it.
When she enters, the torches flare to life, flooding the room with light. The first thing you notice is the crown on her head. The second is the lack of ring on her finger. The third is her eyesâ
The first thing the Huntsman notices is the blood staining the hem of her dress. âI congratulate the Queen,â he croaks. His hands shake as he bows. âThe KingâŚ?â
âThere is no King,â Snow White says. The torchlight is pulled into her crown and is reflected in her eyes.
âOh,â the Huntsman says and pales.
âYouâre dismissed,â Snow White says, not unkindly.
âThank you, Your Majesty.â He edges towards the stairs, eyes darting from the fire to the Queen and you.
âDo see the nobles out,â she says as he reaches the base of the stairs. A smirk tugs at her ruby red lips. âPerhaps theyâll enjoy a jaunt in the woodsâŚ?â
The Huntsman still. âYesâŚâ He climbs the first steps, receding into darkness as he leaves the circle of the firelight. As he climbs, his gait turns predatory. âYes, your majesty.â
Only when the door swings shut behind him does Snow White turn to you.
There is no silence here. Only the hum of your awareness of her and the steady beating of your heart.
âYou returned,â she says.
You stand. The dust has settled along your arms and legs, and it falls like snow when you do. You forgot to move as you waited. âI did.â
She stops short of your cell doors. The shadows wrap around her eyes. âDid you see everything you wanted?â
You lick your lips. âNo.â
Her lips thin. âI told you not to come backââ
âI saw the pyramids,â you say. You step forward so you are only a few feet apart. You stare at her through your bars. âI saw the valleys of the deep and the mountains beyond the veil. I met the people who live inside the World Tree and I slayed those who tried to escape from beyond the end. It was beautiful, but it wasnât everything. No matter what I saw, there was one sight I yearned to see again.â
âYearned,â she repeats. This time, sheâs the one who steps closer. She doesnât protest when you reach out to brush your fingers alongside hers. âYou yearned?â
âI did,â you say. Sheâs warm. You coax her hand to twine around yours. âI came back to see it. But I donât think once will be enough. A whole lifetime may not be enough.â
Her eyes are black like the night sky. Like the abyss you once lost yourself to, like the shadows that gather around you. âWhat sight might that be?â
âYou.â
It is hard to say how the bars disappear. Maybe she whispered that they never existed in the first place. Maybe you cursed them out of existence. Either way, they disappear, and there is nothing between you and Snow White.
And you live Happily Ever After.
---
Thanks for reading! If you're a fan of my superhero works, there's a new flashfiction about Heroes on Tiktok posted to my Patreon which will be up on Tumblr next week :)
If you like what I do and want to see more, please consider supporting me over there! Thanks :) Patreon (X)
Good times gone by.

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Gatekeeping is so good and important
What's she saying in the photo
evil game design must never be done for money reasons. evil game design must be done for the love of evil itself
op surely isn't biased here
Good parents Jack and Maddie crying as their baby boy goes off to college. They've turned off the portal and are in the process of correcting their initial findings so everyone in town tries to avoid them otherwise you will be subjected to the new findings which mark ecto entities as sapient and therefore deserving of rights or gushing about how Danny is off to college since his small business pays so well. He did so well he rejected the scholarships from Gotham University because he said it would be better going to someone who needs it and they did such a good job raising him because look at how successful and generous he is!
The business in question is more of a cheat since being king of the infinite Realms means he is fluent in any language to exist. Safe, dead, or extinct the status of a language doesn't matter to him. With Technus's help he sets up and online portal where people can submit pictures or copies of stuff for him to translate at a premium price. He refuses to take any money from the fruit loop and the money he learns will go towards his clone's schooling when she gets to that point. Right now she is using it for her travels and sending them postcards.
People who claim his translations as their own get black listed with a huge fee coming out of their bank account for the breach of contract. He is trying to keep his business on the down low so those breakthroughs that get on the news are not what he is looking for. His main demographic is rich snobs with private art collections. What Danny doesn't know is that his main customers are the Justice League.
There are some clues but he kinda ignores them. Like when a document submitted is a summoning ritual he sends back a partial translation since the summoning is not good (there are worst beings they could summon but it will still be a hassle) however revealing knowledge of the banishment is harmless.
Gotham cultists hate him because they know he can translate the whole document/book but all of their attempts to trace the sage of tongues (trying to give invisobill kinda vibes) they find a dead end. They try submitting from different computers, locations, routers, anything, but just end up giving Danny more money lol
The Justice League is almost in tears because the jusyice league dark could not agree on the translation of the banishment ritual and everything they tried before had failed.
His favorite translations are the stories that give alien vibes. They talk about certain structures (he thinks it might be structures) as if they are common knowledge. Unknown to him those are Kryptonian fairy tales that Lois submitted. She didn't want to give Jon a funny accent so Clark can read them in Kryptonian while she does the English.
Duke having a hard time with an assignment, sends an inquiry asking if he offers homework help (he wouldn't be using it for career advancement which is against the terms of service BUT he would be claiming it for points so he asked) and that is how Tim finds out about this sketchy website that can translate anything. Danny feels the sincerity and sleep deprivation in the inquiry so he replies back "I admire your courage and will do you a solid but only if your promise to sleep a minimum of 8 hours. I'll know if you don't and snitch so go to sleep đ´" The translation is attached and already in the format his teacher requested.
Steph: How is he gonna know?
Duke: Idk but he is a life saver!
Tim: Duke, did you just sell your soul for a homework assignment?
Duke: Let me sleep and then we'll see what happens đĽą
Tim is driven crazy because he needs to know who is behind the website. And also because Constantine was kinda in the area and said no. Duke has his soul even if he doesn't sleep, lucky bugger.
Tim feels like the world is conspiring against him when it sends the cutest distraction in one his gen ed courses. He will date the cute guy AND solve this mystery out of spite.
for your writing prompt request:
For Primus, being a god was a lot like playing a simulator game. He could control some things about the environment, but ultimately his creations did what they wanted.
He'd wake up, check in with his Prime, make some adjustments, and then go back to trying to recover from his fight with his brother.
He had a weird headache when waking from this particular nap. It seems he was asleep for a bit longer than usual so let's see what the logs say..
Theres a war?! What!
Why?
Who the frag introduced them to the concept of slavery?!
I finally got around to writing something for this :3
Primus loved his creations. He was too tired and weak now after his last fight with his brother to be there for his creations all the time. His long and frequent sleeps kept him from seeing what his ceations were doing, but he would always make sure to check in with the current Prime and make adjustments to the world for when he slept.
But when Primus woke up from his latest nap with a headache that wasnât what happened.
He had slept longer than normal. He always read the logs what happened while sleeping before speaking to his latest Prime. It was best to be prepared after all. But as he read the latest logs, Primus was sure he was hallucinating.
There was a war going on.
A war that had already killed most Cybertronians, and caused many others to flee the planet.
How the frag did that happen?
Primus desperately scrolled back through the logs, trying to find the start of the war, only to feel sick the more he read.
The war started as a revolution.
The Senateâs power grew out of control as they forced mechs to do dangerous work for them for barely any payâand Primus wanted to have words with whoever introduced them to the concept of slavery. Violent words.
The oppressed mechs (who named themselves the Decepticons) got fed up with their treatment and began wiping out the Senate and all mechs related to it which Primus thought was a reasonable response. Unfortunately, the newest Prime who gained his title in the middle of the fighting did not agree with this and started fighting the Decepticons to minimize the destruction. This then spiraled out into a full-on war.
That wouldnât do.
It had been a long time since Primus had interacted with any of his creations other than the Prime, but it seemed like he would have to do exactly that and mediate between the Autobots and Decepticons. Normally, Primus was happy to let his creations do as they wanted, their antics were always delightful giving him a joy that was much rarer since he last fought his brother. He couldnât let them tear themselves apart in a war.
Yes, what happened to the Decepticons was terrible, but according to the logs all the mechs behind that were dead now. There was no reason for them to fight anymore other than fear of what the winning side would do to the losers.
With Primus mediating, he hoped they could finally talk and end the fighting.
miguel and miniguel
This is my current source of happiness I love people translating the Miguel & Miniguel joke in their language đ
multilinguelÂ

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among us is getting a cartoon: oh, this is gonna be a soulless sanitized kid-friendly cash-grab, probably. maybe it'll make some little kids happy, at least?
the showrunner is owen dennis, creator of infinity train: oh, this is gonna be an animated version of The Thing, basically
Aww, Jazz and Prowl are adorable! I missed seeing them. The visor suits Prowl so well, and the fact that it matches Jazzâs makes it even better â¤ď¸
Itâs always a treat to draw them hehe
Hereâs their full designs btw! I wanted to have them share some traits, like the visor and black and white color scheme. But mostly wanted them to stand apart from each other, because itâs funny to me to make them have very different looks and personality wise, just complete opposites.
Best way to describe them in this AU is: âlooks like a cinnamon roll, could easily kill youâ and âlooks like he wants to kill you, is actually a cinnamon roll.â Jazz is all circles and soft shapes and smiles but heâs very very dangerous. While Prowl is all sharp and square shapes and frowns but is actually very sweet (deep down at least), he cares a lot about his fellow autobots, doesnât show it in a conventional way but he tries his best to make sure theyâre okay.