Hello, my name is Teleporno
Remember yourself reading all things Tolkien for the first time? Surely, all the distant âmagicalâ lands, Elves and dragons took your breath away (or failed to do so). But there always were these parts where you could not restrain yourself from laughing out loud because of the very way the words you were reading sound.
In case English is not your mother tongue, chances are that youâve had a feeling (once, at the very least) Tolkien was purposedly trolling you and all of your fellow Finnish/German/Italian/(choose for yourself) speakers. In case English is your native language, youâve probably had this feeling as well.
Here goes a list being compiled with the help of people mentioned at the end of the post. If you wish to contribute, please donât hesitate and send me a note (or two, for the sake of double-checking); Iâll update this very post.
Russian. Literally âramâ (male sheep).
German. Literally âreceiptâ.
Russian. Literally âshoreâ.
German. When said out loud, sounds like the German word for âberriesâ (Beeren).
Teleporno. Self-explanative. In every language.
Czech. âBramborâ means âpotatoâ.
Italian. âTurcoâ means âTurkishâ.Â
Russian. âTurkaâ = âcezveâ.
Spanish. âTurcaâ equals âpenisâ.
Italian. âCurvoâ means âbentâ.
Polish. âCurvoâ means â(you) whoreâ.
Romanian. âCurufinâ means âthe smooth a$$â.
Russian. âCurvaâ goes as a not-that-wide-spread synonym for âwhoreâ, âprostituteâ.
German. Sounds weird (but also poetic) because âElendâ means âgreat miseryâ.
Finnish. Nolo means âembarrassedâ or âawkwardâ.
Latin. Nolo stands for âI donât wantâ.
English. In human anatomy, the groin is the junctional area between the abdomen and the thigh on either side of the pubic bone. [Wiki]
Finnish. âIlmaâ = âairâ.
Finnish. âNelyaâ means âfourâ (and not third).
Finnish. Kana means âchickenâ.
Russian. The first four-five letters have a stunning resemblance with the vulgar word for womenâs genitalia.
German. Mann-Weh is pretty much literally (though not really used) âman painâ.
Polish. âMenelâ is colloquial for âdrunken hoboâ.
Finnish. Anna is a common girlâs name and in finnish language -tar suffix is sometimes added to a title to make a feminine variation of it.
Finnish. âSilmĂ€â means âeyeâ.
Finnish. âUidaâ is âto swimâ.
Russian. âVoronâ stands for âravenâ.