daemonichopsticks

It's a rainy day so Simon is doing a nice cozy stream, jammy pants and everything. He goes off on a tangent about a figure he'd been looking for and found in a second hand shop recently but it's on a lower shelf just in frame so he crouches down to grab it. He didn't even crouch that quickly, but suddenly he feels the pants rip directly up his ass and the chat goes nuts.

"RIPPED LIKE WET PAPER"

"Can Papa Star fight???"

"Oh noooooo my steak is too juicy my lobster is too buttery"

Simon is on the floor cackling because oh my god it really was like wet paper and he's (poorly) attempting to cover the rip with his hands because he's wearing some truly unfortunate galaxy print boxers.

Grace pulls out the teacher voice and says, "Hands and eyes off, that ass is mine and mine only"

Chat immediately is like "Sorry Papa Star" because he may be a sweetheart but that teacher voice is lethal.

The mods ask for a raise because of the sheer number of horny comments they had to delete

Also rip your pajama pants 😭🫡

“Damn Adrian’s really hot” I say as I actively try to draw them as hot as possible (can u tell who all the effort went to 😅)

Fun facts:

Rockdrian’s rings are engraved: Rocky’s says “It’s never enough”, and Adrian’s says “To the stars and back”

Adrian has a tongue piercing 👀😏

Simon’s pendant is secured in his pocket during missions; he doesn’t want to risk the string snapping at the worst moment

Grocky met during uni; pretty wild times, as you might assume

The incident that gave Grocky their scars involves dumb uni students, different types of science, and an egregious lack of lab safety; I’ll let you imagine the rest (they both blame themselves for it)

Grace has (unsurprisingly) the worst fashion sense out of all of them

Also: should Armando be a character too?

“Oh yeah this is rocky! Hes asleep at the moment, he’ll be up and excited to meet you later, yadda yadda—“

And simons just thinking holy shit my life was saved by this insane man. He talks to a rock. He saved the stars? He talks to a rock. He talks to a rock that he keeps in some weird glass ball

And than later rocky finally wakes up, but simon doesn’t realize the rock is moving until hes directly behind simon and going “hello new human! Am roocky! Why screaming, question?”

but guys

have any of us ever like ever considered

Ryan role &/x Mark ego

cause like hear me out

wilf and ken