This was really difficult to record. I know I’ll get a ton of hate for this, but it was a necessary step in healing. Your likes and supportive comments on the video would be much appreciated. 🩷💙💚🧡
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@cyborgqueenkelly
This was really difficult to record. I know I’ll get a ton of hate for this, but it was a necessary step in healing. Your likes and supportive comments on the video would be much appreciated. 🩷💙💚🧡

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I think I need to step away from all of my podcasts and my channel. It’s not safe for me. The threats and harassment are too great. I’ve never even done anything to hurt anyone, but these people want me dead. They’ve already ruined my life.
If you are a fan of FROM, the Carol and Daryl TWD spinoff, Severance, or Yellowjackets and want to step in for me, please let me know.
This was really difficult to record. I know I’ll get a ton of hate for this, but it was a necessary step in healing. Your likes and supportive comments on the video would be much appreciated. 🩷💙💚🧡
I just updated this saga with the latest drama that almost killed me. If there’s any way you can help me get eyes on this, I would be so grateful. I can’t afford an attorney so it’s the only chance I have to get justice.
I won’t survive if I don’t heal, but I am simply too traumatized to be able to heal without justice.
https://www.tumblr.com/cyborgqueenkelly/758397751512940544/newest-public-pdf-private-figures-names
TRIGGER WARNING for bullying/harassment, ableism, gaslighting, and self delete ideation.
will probably get death threats for this, but it is unfuckingacceptable and I have the right to hold this public figure accountable. Additionally, I protected the names of the private figures involved, but not their behavior. People need to know that this should not be tolerated. Harassing a disabled person and then trying to silence them is the epitome of bullying. Especially when you know the target is currently sui**dal.
***NOTE: Any harassment that comes from me posting this will be logged for any possible future lawsuits. If it comes to that, please know that the sources of anonymous and private messages can be subpoenaed. Harassment is never 100% anonymous.
The latest part of this drama, which resulted in my most recent sewer slidal crisis:
NEWEST-Public pdf - private figures’ names redacted .pdf.pdf
Copy of the entire almost-2-year history of harassment:
CQM Public files - Google Drive
Meet Arlo and Maggie Chenoweth, two of the characters from the upcoming show “Teacup” from Peacock . We can’t wait to cover this one! It’ll be interesting to see Yvonne Strahovski play a protagonist for a change!☕️

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Where’s Javi? He’s in Georgia!
Meet Nicholas and Ruben Shanley, two of the characters from the upcoming show “Teacup” from Peacock. We can’t wait to cover this one! ☕️
#teacup
The first message was a voice mail left by police after the first of FOUR swatting attempts by #yellowjackets fans who have harassed me and put me in danger for speaking out about ableism. The second image shows me saying in code so as to not trigger anyone “So sick of waiting around to die” - because I can’t get treatment and everything keeps getting taken from me. The person responded in code “Then do it”. The others are just some recent hate messages I got, except for the last one. The last one is a direct response to my public posts about ableism, and their ego getting bruised because they tried to make an ableism issue all about them. This is silencing disabled people. No one is messaging anyone in an unsafe way. This is about PUBLIC posts. But as you see, they don’t consider ableism a real issue. They’re expressing hurt feelings from disabled people telling them they’re being ableist.
I found out 2 people who worked to gain my trust and were enthusiastically messaging me lied to people, telling them that I messaged them inappropriately. I can’t trust ANYONE.
Let it also be known that the false story keeps changing. First I was messaging minors inappropriately; then I guess that wasn’t believable enough so they changed it to inappropriate messages in general. Now it’s literally, “How dare you respond to someone’s message”. Anything to get the focus off of their ableism.
I have been terrified for 2 days that I or my dogs are gonna get shot by one of the armed men that keep showing up at my place. All of this happened because people refuse to speak up. They’ll gladly watch me die first. I had to go on Lithium as a sui**** preventative in response to this.
Thank you; that means so much to me to read. I’m just reblogging this now because I’ve honestly been struggling to stay alive since then. They took everything from me and calling it out almost killed me. I wish I could get people to care, because I feel like it’s just a matter of time before their indifference and disgust will literally be my death.
I just found this the other day - from my band days. Sadly this is the only recording I have of me singing. 😭 I miss the stage.
I just found this the other day - from my band days. Sadly this is the only recording I have of me singing. 😭 I miss the stage.
A LOT of new drama happened last week.
As usual, I was minding my business, discussing ableism, and sending a few individual messages out BEGGING for help in the kindest, most humble, most apologetic way I could, because no one would defend me.
After I got dogpiled and harassed for comments that were 100% misinterpreted, and I was publicly told to kms, I found out why no one would help me. I think that was Tuesday, 4/26, and the events of that day made me decide that I was going to check out for good. I said goodbye to my husband, and he rushed home before I could finish my plan. I saw my shrink the next day and she and I both agreed that I should probably be in the hospital. But it would financially destroy us. So she took a risk and made me sign an “I won’t unalive myself” contract in exchange for my husband staying home with me and a rx for Lithium.
I’m happy to say that the Lithium has controlled the intrusive thoughts and the active SI. It’s even helped with the passive SI. I still am afraid of life, so I’m doing what I can to sleep as much as possible, being being conscious is emotionally painful. All I can do is hope it gets better. But if you want to know what happened that brought me to this state, check out the video linked in this post.
I also want to say that the Yellowjackets fandom is a disaster and it’s all because of 1 person who manipulated so many. That isn’t an excuse for what people did to me, but this woman has hurt so many people. I’m open to talking to any Yellowjackets fans about how to make the fandom safer and more compassionate. Because from what I’ve seen, it really looks like I’m the only person who wants that and has tried to make that happen.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
The first message was a voice mail left by police after the first of FOUR swatting attempts by #yellowjackets fans who have harassed me and put me in danger for speaking out about ableism. The second image shows me saying in code so as to not trigger anyone “So sick of waiting around to die” - because I can’t get treatment and everything keeps getting taken from me. The person responded in code “Then do it”. The others are just some recent hate messages I got, except for the last one. The last one is a direct response to my public posts about ableism, and their ego getting bruised because they tried to make an ableism issue all about them. This is silencing disabled people. No one is messaging anyone in an unsafe way. This is about PUBLIC posts. But as you see, they don’t consider ableism a real issue. They’re expressing hurt feelings from disabled people telling them they’re being ableist.
I found out 2 people who worked to gain my trust and were enthusiastically messaging me lied to people, telling them that I messaged them inappropriately. I can’t trust ANYONE.
Let it also be known that the false story keeps changing. First I was messaging minors inappropriately; then I guess that wasn’t believable enough so they changed it to inappropriate messages in general. Now it’s literally, “How dare you respond to someone’s message”. Anything to get the focus off of their ableism.
I have been terrified for 2 days that I or my dogs are gonna get shot by one of the armed men that keep showing up at my place. All of this happened because people refuse to speak up. They’ll gladly watch me die first. I had to go on Lithium as a sui**** preventative in response to this.
I am no longer hosting The Antler Queens. It just isn’t safe for me as a disabled person to cover a show with such an intensely ableist Fanbase. I have BEGGED publicly for help with holding my aggressors accountable, and people don’t care. The other day I got dogpiled by ableists in the fandom telling me to unalive myself and that I’m manipulative and make the fandom unsafe for everyone by talking about ableism, which isn’t a real issue but a petty one. They knew I had SI and knowingly made it worse. They continue being offended by being called ableist as they engage in ableism.
I don’t want to live in a world that won’t let me exist and thrive. I’m doping myself up on sedatives to stay asleep as much as possible because being awake is too painful. Nobody would want to live like this.
Anyway, if you want to cohost with Pamela, hit her up.
I no longer want to live. #Yellowjackets fans accused me of many untrue things and told me to k*ll myself. They said that I was sending inappropriate messages, which I’ve never done, accusing them of ableism (I’ve only accused ableists of ableism), and told me that posting about the daily ableist abuse I face is manipulative, makes everyone unsafe and is not activism, nor is what I experience a real problem.
So The Antler Queens is over. And I don’t want to live anymore.
This was really difficult to record. I know I’ll get a ton of hate for this, but it was a necessary step in healing. Your likes and supportive comments on the video would be much appreciated. 🩷💙💚🧡
I NEED YOUR HELP!
PLEASE REBLOG! AND BLAZE IF YOU’RE ABLE TO!
They continue traumatizing me and are getting away with it because no one will call them out. One kind person emailed [email protected] on my behalf recently, and another publicly demanded that they address it like a year ago. But that’s it. It’s beyond depressing that I feel like so many people feel like I deserve this and don’t care that it almost killed me.
I thought maybe outing their transphobic nature (which I didn’t know about previously) would help, but no. I just feel like I’m completely unwanted in this world and I should just disappear from everyone’s lives.
What's important to me is that Daryl and Carol stay true to themselves, get to go on adventures together as an established couple, confront their traumas in powerful ways, and help each other heal and grow and get stronger. Those adventures could happen anywhere. I don't care. They just need to be in the right hands.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
This was really difficult to record. I know I’ll get a ton of hate for this, but it was a necessary step in healing. Your likes and supportive comments on the video would be much appreciated. 🩷💙💚🧡
It breaks my heart to hear someone as kind and as passionate as Kelly is struggling with bullying, harassment, and ableism after working so hard to bring some joy to multiple fandoms. She deserves kindness in return.
Thank you so much, @my-mt-heart !!
That’s what hurts the most is that I started my platform to try to provide a kind, safe space for everyone, and it became the exact opposite through no fault of my own.
I am still dealing with this harassment.
I have been wanting to share my story, because the burden of silence has been slowly killing me. I practiced by posting this with zero hashtags. Now Im having 5 minutes of courage and will try this again. If you know of any way you can help me, please let me know. I lost so many YouTube subs and followers because of them. Do not harass anyone in here, and do not harass me. I'm keeping a file of every hateful message I get.
Im not ready to tag the Yellowjackets fandom, because I don’t have enough support to do that safely. Maybe one day.
I got screwed over by my cohosts that I brought on. They abandoned me over my “distracting” health condition, implying that Showtime would feel the same way. I brought on a new co-host and she lied and backstabbed me the moment she felt like she might get more personal gain from the other podcast. She set me up, knowing how bad my mental health was from this.
This is most of the story, told via evidence.
I’m grateful to those who have supported me. Unfortunately they continue to traumatize me and I have no allies. People want me to shut up. I am fighting this alone. And I can’t do it much longer. I won’t survive. I’m begging for help and support or they will have officially won forever. All the proof is in here.