im too tired for this

i LivEd biTCh

can u imagine jon going along with it and actually getting really into the idea like (pretend jon has no parents for a moment,,, it’s sad yes)

1. dad!jason is best jason a. he lets jon use his powers to beat up bad guys and he doesn’t have to do anything when batman tries to boss him around

2. jon and damian get to hang out a lot more now that jon is in gotham a. jason loves having them both around despite them being “gigantic fucking dorks” b. batman still isn’t allowed to tell jon what to do unless he’s in the batcave,,, so now jon just doens’t go to the batcave

3. jon anticipates every holiday and birthday cuz jason goes ALL OUT  a. it’s amazing and jon does his best to give back as much as he’s given but jason will have none of it b. “ur the kid, i’m the adult, and that means i work my ass off to make u happy and healthy, not the other way around” “but!” “nope, there r only two butts here and those r my butt and ur butt,,, there’s just no room for another butt”

4. jason loves jon with all his cold, zombie, shakespearean heart and jon can honestly say no one tops jason in his eyes

yaaaaaas all this lovin for duke he deserves it all!! 

-dick would literally die for any member of his family, but he has a different reason why for each of them–for duke, it’s cuz he’s the only person who appreciates dick’s riddle puns (even tho it’s always in the middle of a goddamn fight and right when duke is abt to take down a villain or gang member) 

-duke sleeps like dick most of the time (sprawled out in small spaces, pressed against the wall on his back when he’s sharing, or on his side and curled in when someone smaller is with him)–sometimes dick catches duke sleeping in bruce’s shadow, exhausted but trying to help til he drops and dick picks him up and makes him as comfortable as he can in the cave

-dick loves it when he and duke can watch trashy talk shows early in the morning and laugh over the subjects–(duke and tim watch trashy reality shows at night when they can’t sleep, but mornings r for dick only and tim knows and respects this)

-duke likes teasing dick abt his crushes on (redheaded) superheroes

yooooooo yes i can cuz u know what??? duke is secretly jay’s favorite right next to cass but a few hc’s abt them

-duke loves texting jason 24/7 random shit–even when all jay does is reply with “wrong bitch” and nothing else when duke talks shakespeare with him

-everytime we touch is jason’s go-to annoy the batfam song and he’s had duke play it so many times on patrol when he can’t that duke’s been banned from submitting audio by bruce at least 7 times (but babs always sneaks him back on minutes later)

-if anyone fucks with duke, not only will jason appear to murder them, but every other member of the batfam will come to make their life hell–duke knows this, and he loves his family,,,, but he will fucking  d i e  if they ever do it

-jason loves his uniform (loves the red,,, the mask,,, the G u n S) but duke’s newest uniform,,,, has him just a (lot) tad jealous (except the yellow,,,, it’s A Lot)–duke makes it no secret that he thinks jason looks like a complete badass when he shows up to patrol decked out in all his glory (but the mask?? it’s a little much for him)

-a terrifying (wonderful) duo when it comes to hide and seek and tag–(no one’s managed to find them,,, except for jon tho he doesn’t count)

tim, flustered: they're-

dick, shouting: the economy is in shambles!!

talia, perking up immediately: !!!

damian, looking up at his mother knowingly: -with kindness

jason, over him: -thEN RIDE IT WITH MY SURFBOARD

dick and cass, swaying gently, singing slowly but loudly: suuuuurfBOARD,,, SUUUUrfboAAAAARD

steph, on the dining room table: GRAINING ON THAT WOOD, GRAINING, GRAINING ON THAT WOOD

damian, at peace, walking in: ....???!!!

jason and steph, Too Into It: I'M SWERVING ON THAT, SWERVING, SWERVING ON THAT

selina, only half-joking: be useful in life first

manga + robin = 

dick: well i will if u will

duke: well i don’t know what’s going on, but i’ll do it by myself if u two don’t shut up

steph: they’ve been pussyfooting around abt who’s going to put glitter on first

duke, dick, and jason all at once: such vulgarity

roy, swooning over tiny robin: omg so smol so cute so RED

jason, fuming, trembling in barely concealed embarrassed rage: u dumb donkey i’ll kick ur BUTT stop being so freakin cute

talia, tucking him in: no need to wonder, my wayward son

bruce, picks damian up, balances him on his hip: to look pretty, i suppose

damian: but she’s already pretty!!

bruce: aww