♞ JOYEUSE ORDRE! ;

“ ya an idiot or did’ja hit yer ‘ead fallin’ down ? there’s nothin’ cool ‘bout landin’ !!  leave me out ‘f it, i ain’t gonna do stupid shit wit’ ya ! ”

@coolestpaladin​   said : i tried jumping off a cliff earlier and landed heroically maybe if u do something similar u can be cool too

“ huh, th’ hell ya mean ‘land ‘eroically’ ? OII, YA TRYIN’ TO MESS WIT’ ME AGAIN, YA DAMN BRAT ? I’M ALREADY COOL ! ”

Such a good boy.

“You’re the coolest.”

   !!!!!!!!!!!!!

“ what, who th’ hell cares ‘bout that —  ”   wait, did he just say hijikata …  “ oi, yer jus makin’ fun ‘f me now, huh ? TALKIN’ ‘BOUT THAT BASTARD AN’ SAYIN’ STUPID SHIT ! OIII, WHADDYA MEAN HE’S MORE AWESOME ? ”

“You’re all average, how about that?”

“ haah, who th’ hell yer callin’ not awesome ?  ”   how dare this little saber punk even approach with a blasphemous conclusion. he was the awesomest, of course !!   “ my skills are superior, even t’ yers — i am a sword prodigy, ya damned idiot !! are ya lookin’ t’die ? ”

   ❝ M-Maman --- !! ❞ 

   Flustered, Charlie flailed his arms and legs on reflex, yet the hold that his mother had on him was unaffected. Somehow, even though he had already grown past his adolescent years, he felt the same way as he used to many years ago. A difficult-to-describe feeling of safety and comfort spread from her warm touch. Awkward as this position was, a mother’s hands were warm and didn’t seek to harm. Underneath a young man’s embarrassment was a child’s attachment, and Charlie no longer struggled after a few flails. ( Although, it wasn’t likely that he would be able to free himself anyway. After all, his mother just picked him up like he was a bag of feathers! )

SHINE BRIGHT LIKE THE COOLEST SABER!

   ... hmm? That vivid rose-colored gown, golden hair, shining emerald eyes! That distinct charm and elegant poise which could only belong to one of the most famous Roman emperors in history! He would recognize the Emperor of Roses anywhere, even from afar!

   He looked up upon hearing that nickname --- the one used only by the girl not too far away, within arm’s reach. Compared to the textbook opened in his lap, even if it was important to his studies, it was much easier for Bradamante to capture his attention. Always, no matter where, he would find her to be the brightest, and his eyes would follow even without his own awareness. ❝ Mm? The fourteenth? ❞ Furrowing his brows, he tried to remember what was special about that day. If memory served, it was... La Saint-Valentin?

   Thud!

   As Charlie sat up in shock, the book slid off of his lap and onto the ground, narrowly missing his foot. This was completely left field! But still, he leaned forward eagerly ---

Edmond Dantès // @enferne​–– uh oh papa caught me :’(

If only he had left ten seconds sooner, he just might have managed to slip out the door unnoticed. Perhaps it was wishful thinking, considering how astute his father could be––and how he probably overlooked a porcelain shard somewhere. Holding the trash bag close against him, hoping that the pieces of the vase wouldn’t make too much noise, he wondered what he should write in his will. Should he leave something for Bradamante? Astolfo? Maybe even Roland?

No, no! It’s okay, Charlie! Just turn around slowly, give a little wave, and act casual! Big smile, as always! Don’t look guilty!