CollieCross :)

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

Some day I want to see a show that does the “no filler episodes” thing from the opposite direction. Just a whole season worth of low-stakes character pieces that seem to move the overall story absolutely nowhere, then episode 26 pulls all the triggers at once and this massive Rube Goldberg machine of a plot the show’s been quietly setting up in the background the whole time hits you like a truck.

Id like to welcome you all to tuesday

Regular Couple

this ended homophobia

happy pride month

it's that time again, kids

this actually made me cry with joy also one of them is eating noodles

It just keeps going and getting better. *^^*

CAT PARADE IS BACK

I’ve been blessed with the kitty marching band! I love them 💚🥰

Never not reblogging the cat parade!

World Heritage Post

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

Another update: I taught him what it means when something is "the GOAT" and we've been teaching the dog new tricks, so whenever he learns a new trick, we call him goated. My grandpa taught him a new skill while I was at work and the first thing he said to me when I got home was "the goated dog knows how to roll over on command now :)"

a rather unfortunate hobby of mine is recreating undertale/deltarune songs so that i can replace the melody with megalovania. i dont know why i do this

[ID: A bunch of Undertale tracks with their instruments set to play Megalovania (Once Upon a Time, mus_st_him, Death by Glamour, Your Best Friend, Temmie Village, Start Menu, and Power of "NEO") with tags reading "#I think this might be illegal actually op #go to undertale jail" and a pic of OP's avatar in Papyrus' shed, and a comment by @cherub-investigation0802 reading "Okay now Im curious of what the inverse is like" with Megalovania set to play Fallen Down. /End ID]

Your Tumblr username decides your profession. How is your first day at work?

i am a cannibal idk

Skin :3

a girl.

im very pretty in pink

idk but whatever I did I fucked it up like real bad

I am. here????

so I’m both a gladiator and whatever the fuck d’Artagnan was (I forgor)

I’m boring

This will be me in like two months when I am about to leave my job and I come out to my coworkers because I can haha

hm. How do I Sprite™ for a living? Vending machine operating maybe

I think I’m just like an abandoned tourist attraction I mean when you mix irrelevant with sarcasm ghost you get me and I just forgot what I was talking about so anyway

So I’m random, Indian and a girl… I basically do nothing out of the ordinary kk

I make average shitposts on social media for a living ig

it is i, the benevolent leader of the feline kingdom.

This is just me every day

I don’t know what I’m doing but I’m probably bad at it

I guess I’m a mycologist

So… I’m an exiled shapeshifter??? I guess???

Uhm.. Ig I hypnotize ghosts??

I am. Technically the concept of loving someone because that’s what the 143 means. Our name is just a collective name + Nakahara is smth that rolls off the tongue well

im conan gray’s ex? this is NOT gonna be good for me—

Sith Lord apparently I’m sure we’ll do great

I’m from the cafeteria (on the aurora O_o)

I get to learn magic?! And live in a pretty tower?!! Wonderful

am i working at an aquarium with a cephalopod that keeps escaping or am i the cephalopod

nooo i don’t wanna do terrorism as my job

I guess you can get paid for dog walking??

✿＼(｡-_-｡) “Kick his ass, baby.  I got yo flower.”

thanks for ruining my post jackass

(￣^￣ﾒ)＼✿ "Fine, I'ma keep ya damn flower.“  

@hellsite-hall-of-fame look I found it

This stupid exchange between friends has become a cultural icon.

who’s gonna tell tumblr that executive dysfunction is more than Not Doing Things?

Girl, help. None of my executives are functioning

i thought delaware was a place in ohio? why are there so many things named delaware?

what the fuck

Wait what? I thought Delaware was a store with building supplies. Like paint, wood, nails and stuff?

THATS HOME DEPOT ???

I know home depot, but dude I don't know anything about America mad have never been there. Are you sure there is not a some sort of store called something close to Delaware!?!

.....ace hardware....?

this post has only been around for a few hours but could very well be a world heritage post

This post launched at 8am PST on 12 Feb 2021. The above conversation has happened in 3 hours.

he WHAT? i thought he was from. w. wait. ???

delaware stole the presidents shoelaces for clout and became too powerful

From the UK- and what do you mean Delaware isn't a type of ceramic?

@hellsite-hall-of-fame is it too early?

Isn’t delaware what they make computers on???

software ??

oh i thought delaware was that one british singer lady, you know, the one from chasing pavements

that's fucking adele

isn’t delaware that place you go when you die

youre thinking of superhell and all of you are going there

how the fuck did any of you come to the conclusions you all made

we live in america?

I thought Delaware was that food delivery service that keeps interrupting youtube videos with their ads when I'm trying to have a good time

..... are you talking about Doordash???

Isn't Delawere the name of that one girl in the song that goes "Hey there, Delawere"? She's from NYC or something.

THATS HEY THERE DELILAH

Pausing here to point out that op is “dear-AO3″ and now I’m wondering if Delaware fanfic would be categorized as RSF (real state fic) or AU (alternate unitedstates)

stop i do not want to think about this 

Isn’t Delaware that SPN ship that exploded the internet

I love that the “no, that’s [x]” meme is making a comeback here and only here and nobody has any idea what’s going on

Keep up the good work, we can make poor OP have a melt down yet. 

Isn't delaware that one brand of pizza that's like "it's not delivery, it's delaware."

isn't delaware the god of the sea

Isn't Delaware the name of that guy who painted the Mona Lisa?

delaware is that one evil cyborg guy that has a son named Luke and a red laser sword

Thats Darth Vader. Im pretty sure Delaware is that other red-laser sword guy. You know. The one that stabbed Qui-Gon.

I usually only reblog older posts, but this definitely deserves to be in every tumblr hall of fame

this post has only existed for 8 days. 

This is fantastic because it goes great with my theory that Delaware only exists for tax purposes. Like, all the states really only exists for Tax Purposes, but Delaware is particularly fake because back in 2012 I got lost in the Alleged Delaware Area looking trying to get to a family reunion, but every time I pulled over for directions, I would ask what the hell state I was in now, and I went through Mayland, Pennsylvania, New Jersey AND Virginia and I never fucking found Delaware but I did eventually find the Family Reunion and earned the repsepct of my then-prospective- Great-Grandmother-In-Law by saving her favorite grandchildren from a furious oceangoing horse so I’m convinced that not only is the state a purely legal construct, they didn’t even dedicate any landmass to it, or it’s a gov’t blackzone where the carnivorous horses live.

World Heritage Post

fun fact, i actually drove through delaware on this posts 6 month birthday. i hate it here.

This post literally fills me with life,tysm.

This post confused the heck out of me, I don't even know what's going on in this post, why the hell am I rebloging it?

Every single odd number has an “e” in it.

LISTEN-

Not all of them. 30 and 50 aren’t spelled with the letter e in it …

father god 

…if you can split a number in half evenly, it’s even. 30 and 50 are odd.

25+25 = 30? You sure about that??

Lord have mercy….

Bye

3 days into 2018 smh

LMAOOOOOOO

It keeps getting worse.

LMAOOO WHAT IS GOING ON

My head hurts…

This is why that Tumblr University shit was the dumbest idea ever just look at this

who failed yall?

IM SCREAMING

You whole ass forgot about eight - a number with an e and is pretty fucking even

3 days until 2019 and we’re still here

happy New year’s eve

I’m going to bring this flaming dumpster into 2019 so future generations can see what a mistake Tumblr was

Er, guys two is odd and doesn’t have an e. Just saying…

did you deadass just try to tell me two is odd? i’m fucking crying throw the whole website away

Reblogging for the last one😂

The one thing I notice is that no matter how much you want to throw this site away, you just can’t.

TWO IS ODD?!?! PFFFTT I’M SCREAMING

Wait what about zero that’s an odd number ,no?

ok but hear me out fifty and thirty make up for the fact they have no e by the way they are pronounces third-E fifth-E

bro why do 30 and 50 matter THEY’RE FUCKING EVEN

what the actual fuck is happening

1 is an even number

I’m gonna smack you

-30 and -50 have an e in them

Wait why are we so quick to throw away the Zero idea

Zero isn’t a number

It can’t be divided by two though, can it

It can??? 0/2=0??

OD numbers huh?

Anything that ends with a 0,2,4,6,8 is even and the rest is odd (1,3,7,9) stop freaking out y’all

YOU FORGOT 5

DUDE WHAT ABOUT FOUR

What about it?????

THAT DOESN’T HAVE E IN IT

THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S EVEN?????

A R E Y O U G U Y S O K A Y

21 days away from 2020, folks.