anyway have i ever told you how weird i think it is that samira isn't more central to the robby and baran conflict. how i think baran absolutely would've sought samira out in the morning, someone she knows/trusts and someone who's worked with robby for years, to get a measure of the man and advice on how to work with him. and samira would tell baran that robby's an excellent physician who's taught her a lot, but she isn't the best person to ask about building a working relationship with him. when baran asks why samira will tell her briefly about robby's enduring issue with her speed, the MCI, and how she thought robby would've treated her differently after proving herself but never did. ("I've done everything he's asked of me, but no matter what I do it's like it's never enough.")
incredibly odd that samira herself isn't the one who notices baran's ongoing seizures. samira who is curious and clever and notices shit other people don't. notices women and minorities and people who have to struggle to be seen. samira who, as the day and her mother and her anxiety wear her down to nothing, wrestles with whether to tell robby about what she observes. and when she eventually does, she gets thanked. Gets maybe a third of the way through asking for a rec letter before robby turns around and curtly tells her "not now".
bizzare that we don't see samira again at the end of the day with baby jane doe, seeking a moment of quiet solace with a lonely little girl as her world feels like it's falling apart. wrestling with feelings that she's betrayed the trust of someone she respects and still has to work with in the desperate, grasping hope that robby will give her something, anything, to help guide her to where she's supposed to be. afraid of the fallout beyond these four walls, on top of everything else.
she fliches when robby opens the door. when he chastises her for hiding in pedes when she should be on the floor. "this child does not need you," he spits, and inside samira feels something give way that can't be fixed.
anyway. weird. i'm sure there's a good reason for baran to volunteer all that information about her health to a man who's bullied her from the moment she walked in the name of mutual "respect" tho.
amandla
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
blakekathryn
vaporwave
