damn I look good at a podium

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#extradirty

Origami Around
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NASA
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Today's Document

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izzy's playlists!
One Nice Bug Per Day

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Not today Justin
we're not kids anymore.
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@clivvy
damn I look good at a podium

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think again motherfucker
[ID: Eight screencaps from Taskmaster. Joel Dommett reaches up one finger to burst a floating bubble, then looks around open-mouthed and ecstatically happy. Later, in the studio, Greg Davies says, "I'm just enchanted, watching Joel do anything, really, because he throws himself into it with such glee. And then every now and again, I just go, 'Oh, my God, he's 40!'" Joel says cheerfully, "Yeah. Mad, isn't it? I pay a mortgage." End ID.]
the only reason I know anything about the world cup right now is through nanoff drawing the losing countries getting railed
wtf happened in today's game

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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hello 👋 i am the worlds smallest bug 🐛 and ☝️ i too would like to “fag it up” if i may
picklesbaseball
husband: I'm so glad we finally have our own place! You did such a great job decorating it, honey
fujo wife: Really? You don't think it's kind of...chintzy?
darkest timeline where data is chatgpt and therefore stupid and bad

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
my friend keeps sending the groupchat voice notes of her eating bussy and calling it "asmr"..... bro go study for your physics exam 😭
hi sorry uh. incredible miscommunication on my part lmfao.
my bad yall
how id survive horror movies:
iron lung: im vaccinated against polio so i dont need one
it: my pronouns are she/they
sinners: im an atheist
the backrooms: my house doesnt have that many rooms
Resident evil: id evict them
Midsommar: im swedish.
Get out: ok i'll leave
x: im still calling it twitter
american psycho: i live in sweden
[ID: Eleven screencaps from Taskmaster. Armando Iannucci says, "And I've always hated it... Always hated it when, like, at weddings, when somebody goes, 'Come on and do a dance! Come on!' And I go, 'No, I hate da...' 'No, come on!' And I resolved when I hit 60, which I did last year, that if that happens again, I will just tell them not to touch me, and I will phone the police. Any wedding I'm at and I'm asked to dance, I'm just going to say, to the bride's mother, 'Fuck off.'" End ID.]
Hello!
Howdy!
I’d like, uh, two normal rolls.
Sure thing!
And one with the… With the pumpkin seeds.
Which do you mean?
The one with the… With the seeds.
What are they called?
Uhm… A, uh, “crunchy pumpky.”
Sure thing. Would you like anything else?
Uhh… I’ll also take a, uh… A… A Nutella donut…?
Unfortunately, I don’t know at all what you mean…
A… One of those right there!
You really must tell me, what’s it called??
I… I’m… I’m a dumb piece of shit.
Sure thing! Anything else?
That one there?
You know what you need to do. [Here she switches from the formal, customer service voice to addressing him casually and familiarly.]
I… I’m a little greedy pig, oink oink?
Do it!
[grunts like a pig]
That comes to €13.50, please! Have a beautiful day!
Hello! I’d like an “I hate my father” and two “I have a small willi—” [The word that gets cut off is Pimmel, an un-sexy term for penis.]
this is my impression of what it would look like if the toddlers at my job could make traumacore edits about me
alright by popular demand here is more toddler traumacore

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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ughhhhh I wasn't looking for AI in a post that was 99% text. irritating
You just know her house is FULL of chintz