When Superman falls for Batman and Lois Lane, he's terrified he'll have to choose.
Instead, Batman and Lois make a deal: Lois can have Clark and Batman can have Kal/Superman.
Lois thinks it's a good deal. Batman is only around late at night when she tends to be sleeping (or busy burning the midnight oil) anyway, so she can have Clark all to herself during the day (in between him running out to save lives of course).
Except she doesn't account for Bruce fucking Wayne.
Bruce, who's started hanging around Metropolis with suspiciously low security and suspiciously expensive accessories.
Bruce, who pissed off Lex Luthor so badly at a gala last week that he's placed himself firmly on top of the man's kidnap list.
Bruce, who boasted on live television that he was close personal friends with Superman, and therefore no ne'er-do-well would ever dare bother him.
In short, Lois was prepared for Superman and Batman, but she was definitely not ready for Superman and Bruce Wayne.
It all culminates in a screaming fight on top of the Daily Planet while Clark keeps changing in and out of his civvies because every time he tries to intervene he gets a "you're not my boyfriend right now" from one of them.
Lois is pointing. Batman is growling. Clark is wringing his cape in his hands.
Batman and Lois get closer and closer as they argue, until suddenly...
When they finally pull a part a few minutes later, the anger has fizzled and Clark's superpowered brain still hasn't processed what's going on.
"Are you amenable to changing the terms of our deal?" Bruce asks.
"I may be amenable," Lois replies, straightening her hair.
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