Cicer

Gareth Mallory looks at his Chief of Staff, Quartermaster, and Professional Assistant from across his desk.

"I have scheduled a series of teambuilding exercises and morale-boosting events for the month of July, and named it the A.N.E.M.O.N.E. Games."

"Like the flower, sir?" Tanner asks, tamping down his sense of unease. He has a feeling that his workload is about to quadruple.

"No, the sea creature. Another Novel Experience Magnifying Our Notorious Employees."

Moneypenny nods and taps out some notes into her laptop, and privately wonders if M's experience being preyed upon by a gigantic starfish has left deeper psychological scars than previously thought.

"Each week of the month shall have a particular theme to highlight: Respect, Integrity, Creativity, and Courage. The activities of the week will challenge our employees to demonstrate their numerous skills." M takes off his glasses and looks each of them in the eye. "And I do expect as many people as possible to participate.

I'll prepare a short speech for this coming Sunday, specific to Respect. I'll be tied up the rest of the month, so I trust you three will be able to handle the remaining weeks; make introductory speeches, design appropriate challenges and so forth." M's matter-of-fact demeanor dares them to demur, and after a few more minutes of saying a great deal and getting nothing accomplished, Moneypenny, Tanner, and Q quietly file out of M's office.

The real discussion begins once they relocate into the relative privacy of Tanner's office. Q opens by sighing and rubbing at his temples in a classic ‘my boss has just given me a migraine' gesture.

"So in summary, M's had an idea and we're responsible for making it happen, never mind whether it's a good idea or not."

"Après moi, la…délégation," Eve shrugs, and Tanner has to agree. They really haven't been left with any other option. At least, not if they want to remain in their current positions.

"Business as usual."

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Even the great MI6 isn't immune to the corporate team-building trend. Past and present staff and beloved contractors – everyone from baristas to DoorDash delivery regulars – are being dragged into a month of activities. Will it bring staff closer together, or prove to be another month of jargon and a backlog of work?

And where are the double-ohs?

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But to the room full of world leaders bombarding him with Astorphage breeding questions when he arrived at the Vat. Like he JUST got there and he's dizzy and sick and they were all shouting and muscle memory just kicked in, you gotta believe him, he wasn't even thinking.

They'd all be so shocked it would work though.

He'd have .001 second to panic, like did he really just do that, and then its either control or loose control of the room just like any middle school class.

He'd still have his hand up like "Okay. Who wants to go first."

And Eva would watch like three people actually, legitimately, raise their hands and wait to be called.

Eridian Field Trip.

They wear suits, but they don't even know basic etiquette.