Cicer

Q glanced up for a second and was met with those terrifying blue eyes burning into him as James leaned over the table in an attempt to get a closer look. He cocked his head to one side, which Q always thought made him resemble a rather nosy dog.

"If you just give me a moment..."

"-but-"

"-a moment!" Q cut him off before he could cause further distraction. He tapped the last few commands into his phone. "Honestly I don't know how you survive on stakeouts, you're about the least patient person I've ever met." He reached into his bag and rummaged around until he found what he was looking for. He straightened back up in his chair and looked into James' face, the off-centre crease between his brows had deepened just a little, the way it did when he was desperately curious about something. "Are you paying attention?" He asked

James smirked. "To you, Q, I'm always paying attention."

Q opened his hand to reveal what he'd taken out of his bag. At first glance one would be forgiven for mistaking them for pearls, or fake ones at any rate. But they were oh so much more interesting than that.

James was frowning again and starting to reach over to take one out of Q's palm, but before he could Q pulled back. "Now now," he pressed his lips into a teasing smile. He glanced round for suitable targets. The restaurant they were at — one of James' favourites, suitably chic and with price tags and clientele to match — was reasonably busy this evening. Q selected his three unsuspecting victims and, quickly before anyone could notice what he was doing, rolled the not-pearls in three different directions. James watched, face unchanged to anyone who didn't know him exceptionally well.

"Someone could trip on that, you know."

Q just rolled his eyes and started tapping on his phone with one hand, with the other he slid an earpiece over the tablecloth towards James. He gave Q a measuring look before slowly fitting it into his ear. Q did the same, before hitting the play button.

"Do you know Goss?"

"Goss who?"

"Gosford, Pete Gosford. I think he's from up your way..."

Q watched Bond's mind working as he took in the two male voices coming through the earpiece and scanned the room before alighting on the city types a few tables over networking over steaks and an ill-paired bottle of wine. Bond glanced over at him, the ghost of a smile twitching at his lips.

"Very clever."

"Nothing particularly inspired, just ordinary microphones." Q shurgged.

"You undersell yourself, it's remarkably clear."

"These two aren't particularly interesting though," They'd moved on to talking shop about stock prices. "Let's try..."

Q changed the channel and the voices instantly changed. Bond picked them out more quickly this time. A table of middle aged ladies sipping prosecco under gold foil balloons declaring that it was one of their 50ths.

"I hear he's already strapped for cash."

"How's that happened, you think?"

"All gone up his nose I bet."

"And I heard the new Squeeze has already thrown him out."

There was a shocked gasp. "Really? How?"

"Cheated on her, that's what Parvinder said anyway."

"He always did have a wandering eye."

"Now don't you worry Sandra, there's someone out there waiting for you I just know it."

"What about him over there?"

"Who?"

"What? Him with the eyes?"

James chuckled as all of the heads turned unsubtly in their direction.

"Ooof he's a bit of alright, isn't he?"

"Instant swipe right."

"Who's he with, you think?"

"Son?"

"That's his boyfriend you silly buggers!"

"What that speccy git?"

"They've barely said a word to each other all night."

"Did you not see them kiss on the way in?"

"Shazza how much of this have you had?"

"I'm not making it up! Why would I lie about something like that?"

"So you can keep him all to yourself-"

Q hit pause. "That's quite enough of that."

James was looking right at him. "Shame," He said leaning closer. Q could smell the vermouth on his breath. "I was hoping to hear what they had to say when I did this." He tilted Q's jaw up and kissed him far more filthily than was entirely appropriate for the time and place.

Q let him have his moment before pushing him away with a finger on his tie knot. "Plenty of time for that later."

"Is that a promise?"

Q could see heads twitching back and forth. They'd given that table something to talk about for the rest of the night at least.

"We've still got one more." He switched over to the final channel.

"Don't look at me like that Jonno."

"Look at you like what?"

James' eyes instantly snapped to a rather unhappy looking younger couple at a central table.

"You know what."

"I'm not doing anything."

"I can't even deal with you right now!"

"If this is about Georgia again."

"Yes it's about Georgia!"

"I told you she's just a friend. What am I not allowed to have friends?"

"A friend you shagged!"

"That was one time-"

"It was NOT one time."

"-bu-"

"Three times Jonno! THREE TIMES!"