a defiant potato

SIKE

THEY'RE GAY

And they're not some rare exception to the rule, either!!!

About 25% of black swan couples consist of two swans of the same sex (typically, two males).

These couples will court each other, build a nest, and raise their young together in a more-or-less committed monogamous relationship.

In fact, these same-sex couples have a high success rate of 80% when raising their young to adulthood, as opposed to the 30% of their heterosexual counterparts! Two big buff papa swans are better than one when it comes to stomping on invaders of nesting territory.

"But," I hear you say, "where do their baby floofballs come from? Does mpreg exist among black swans?"

Alas, no, but there is a very elegant solution to this. The swan couple may simply temporarily associate themselves with a female swan.

Afterwards, the female swan deposits their eggs and swims off free to live her single girlie life if she wishes (or, find a boyfriend. Preferably one who isn't already committed to another boyfriend.)

So whenever someone commits the naturalistic fallacy "homosexuality bad because unnatural >:(" I like to point out not only their glaring illogicality, but also, respectfully, there is homosexuality happening in the local lake right now.

Not the whole time. Obviously she goes into labor right before the climactic battle, then fights it with the newborn infant in one arm. Maybe hands it to Galavant for a moment so they have to trade off who's wielding one- vs two-handed.

Her pregnancy is partly played for laughs, because no self-respecting comedy writer is going to skip jokes about cravings, mood swings, the infinite struggles of back pain...

But moreover, Izzy has a compelling character arc about her current and incipient struggle to maintain her sense of self as a (retired) warrior princess versus a mother. She literally can't fight as well while pregnant, and it's arguably irresponsible to throw herself into battle the same way - and that's going to be her whole future? The rest of her life, no longer a svelte young romantic lead but a doting mother or, at best, nagging wife?

Galavant is also having his own anxious pre-parenthood arc, mostly about "oh god I don't want to be a shitty absent father like my dad. he's my only role model! yeah, he turned out okay later, but not when he was raising me!"

These issues collide in Galavant trying really hard to care for Isabella, protect her, help her on and off horses, etc - partly because he's correcting to overprotective and treating her like spun glass (she accuses), but also because he, y'know, loves her and their unborn child, and wants them to be protected, comfortable, and loved…

They are both being dramatic about this all season. It's a driving source of conflict and development...

Valencia (Isabella's parents retired to a beachside cottage next door to her and Galavant, to be full-time grandparents)

The kingdom of those sister-princesses who were cruel to Madelena (mass peasant revolt -> Reign of Terror-esque bloodbath -> Richard & Bobby conquered it for everyone's own good really)

Hortensia (it's technically a Protectorate, or maybe a Regency, because of course they had an 11yo king and 0 army.)

Princess Jubilee's kingdom (sold it to Richard for three crates of beer and a ticket to fantasy!Paris, where she's now kicking ass and partying bisexually)

2 other realms that no one really cares about, they're just, like, peasants and fields, and maybe a castle or two.

HOWEVER in the week that Richard was dead, Valencia, Hortensia, and Jubilee's kingdom all rebelled! Bobby, with Tad Cooper and maybe the obligatory heir & spare she and Richard probably had, are in the former-Reign of Terror kingdom, cut off from the rest of the party!

So, as they travel the kingdoms to get the McGuffin pieces, they're also re-persuading people to accept Richard's rule...while Bobby trails like an episode behind, picking up the pieces of whatever that leaves behind, and dealing with all hte practicalities of rule. She's narratively cast as Competent Wife to Hapless Husband, but she keeps insisting that she's so overworked in this because usually Richard does half the work. To Richard's credit, he is genuinely effective - with other characters' help - at convincing people to re-join his mega-kingdom.

The reason Hortensia rebelled is that little Prince Harry has actually grown into a totally fit & handsome young man who has roused the people to retake their own kingdom. We're going to have to let them be, ultimately, only re-joining in alliance. Jubilee's kingdom has rebelled because she came home and was like was like, "Yo, still mine." Richard gets thrown out of her kingdom; Isabella stays behind and she and Bobby convince Jubilee to join the alliance, too (while Isabella gets help going with her warrior princess/motherhood issue.)

The culmination of all of this of course, is Richard returning at last to the one holdout: his birth kingdom. He will have to participate in a democratic election and be CHOSEN as king...with limited executive power even in emergencies like the obviously ongoing one right now, with all the zombies and monsters. What sort of idiots would give unlimited emergency power to a sole executive on the grounds of said executive declaring an undefined emergency?

Btw Bobby has a Tad Cooper on a leash the whole time, which goes off screen so the mighty dragon is never seen. Sometimes there's a burst of fire from that direction. When she FINALLY catches up with everyone for the season finale, Tad Cooper has a dramatic entrance where he scours a battlefield of monsters with a blast of fire and we finally see him, a grand shot from below, he's haloed by the sun...

He's an iguana on a tall rock, about 5ft up. Cut to everyone standing around and looking down at the iguana. Galavant says, "That's...a full-grown dragon?"

"Yes!" Richard says indignantly. "Yes," Bobby says tiredly.

this particularly works with anything negative i’ve forecasted. “i woke up feeling like shit today, so my day is gonna suck” isn’t a particularly helpful thought, but “it’s a great day to be alive!!!!!” feels hollow and insincere when i have a pounding headache & am running on three hours of sleep

instead i’ll tell myself, “i really don’t feel good right now, but i’m open to the possibility that coffee and breakfast might perk me up a bit.” or “i’m in a lot of pain today, but i’m open to the possibility that my workday might still have fun parts despite that”

"I'm open to the possibility this won't entirely suck."

"This sounds awful but I could be surprised. I'd love to be proven wrong."

"My hopes aren't high but I guess we'll see."

And writing is a very romanticized field, so is basically everything/anything creative. There are many stories about passionate painters and sculptors and poets.

But I have never ever managed to be passionate to the end of a project. Never. There are parts where passion is rekindled, where I enjoy what I am doing and it is great and beautiful and lovely. I do love putting together dialogue edits and suddenly hearing people having a conversation instead of me repeating lines in a room. I love how things sound after I add the sound design.

But I think there's a very large part of writing that is closer to marriage or a dedicated friendship, where I am doing it because I choose to. I finish projects because it is an active decision I make over and over and over again. Even if, at times, it feels more like a chore to be done than a passion to be swept away by.

I finish projects because somewhere in me, I think it's a task worth doing for the sake of doing. And sometimes it just fucking sucks. Sometimes I hate writing, sometimes I have to drag myself to the microphone or psych myself up to do sound design.

Sometimes writing is a job and you just have to keep plugging away until it's time to clock out and you feel like you're free. And other times it is what everyone says it is, it is magical, and beautiful, and easy and fun.

Scarlet Ibis (Eudocimus ruber), family Threskiornithidae, order Pelicaniformes, Colombia

Don’t they know that murder is illegal? You just know there are a bunch of homicidal maniacs out there who love to read those stories. They write them, too, in between killing people. 

No.