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anyway, regularly scheduled reminder you can hire me to write and/or edit things for you
Jessica Guarneri's proofreading & writing services

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Yeah, it's time to get this post out again
On April 4, 1841, William Henry Harrison, our 9th POTUS, became shortest serving President in US history by dying in office from pneumonia wildly believed to be have been caused by his decision to give a two hour inaugural address in the pouring rain without a coat or hat. Just a fun fact unrelated to this tweet.
people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour
and none of them will call you back
people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour

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some people like to get mad at disability benefits because they think its unfair people who dont work get a payout from the government while they have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week. but if you tell them "yeah that sucks i think you should also get a universal allowance and not have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week" thats apparently the wrong answer.
Here’s a community reminder that the New York Post is owned by Rupert Murdoch, owner of Fox News, and is generally considered to be an arm of the far right’s propaganda machine.
They just do a slightly better job of pretending they’re centrist or liberal than Fox News, because their goal is not to sway conservatives, but to sway everyone to the left of the far right.
Flying Colors Ep. 10
Previous Episode
A massive threat thunders onto the stage and hackles are raised!
Thanks so much for your patience with my sparse uploading—no matter how much my life changes, I intend to see Flying Colors through to its end. And we’re just getting started 😈
I’m also on Art Fight this year under bcstag. Though I won’t be able to participate as much as I did last year, I’d like to attack/revenge at least a couple times. Last year’s attacks on my characters mean so much to me; thanks again to all those who created something!
Read On:
My Comic Site
The woman, aged about 50, was buried in a Siberian ice cave and discovered millennia later.
She was a 50 y.o. Siberian woman from 2500 years ago, living a nomadic lifestyle, and look at her tattoos...
Look...
I'm going to cry

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So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)
Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.
So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.
But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.
It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?
So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:
Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.
And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.
So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".
So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.
I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.
Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:
My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.
Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.
Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.
Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).
Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues
(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)
ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:
According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.
Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.
For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.
So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.
Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.
Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life
Aaand a close-up:
The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace
HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE
via @kagaminilen
[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]
Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic
Oh my goodness you're my hero this is so beautiful
Holy fuck my job got fan art
hey. is this yours?
HOLY SHIT
edit: I should clarify this isn't my kiosk. my kiosk was probably taken out in pieces and most likely by mall management. but it's an extremely funny coincidence
SMALL UPDATE
Still haven't heard back from the unemployment office, but a few days ago I ended up telling this to the SNAP caseworker, who absolutely lost her shit and then put everything on hold to go investigate this herself out of a sense of justice and Needing To Know More. World's most nosy angel who helped me out a lot in general (in case she ends up seeing this: I appreciate her so much).
While she didn't find a facebook listing for a used kiosk (yes, that post is just a coincidence, I'm sorry), what she did find was the actual kiosk for sale. By the owner. On a reputable website.
Now, there are a lot of funny conclusions to be drawn from this, but I'm afraid it's not quite that wild. I asked a friend in management about it and turns out the listing is from months before the disappearance, it wasn't kept a secret, it just wasn't relevant. She had been trying to sell it for a while without much luck, wasn't selling the entire business, but just the kiosk with that branch included (the listing advertised that it would include the equipment and drink recipes and retain the current staff). It also said the lease with the mall was active until some time in 2027.
So, no, as funny as that would be, the owner did not heist her own kiosk. However, what this does tell us is:
She must have owned the kiosk outright, so the only way this could be a repossession is if she had a mortgage on it? I guess?
It definitely isn't about the lease being up. So any eviction would legally require like 30-days notice and, presumably, a valid reason like a violation of the terms. (this is how it works with renting homes in my country, and I've never rented a business location, so I can only guess that it's similar)
The store was not financially beneficial enough to keep. This could just mean that she was focusing on other ventures like she says in the listing, but it could really also mean that she was having money trouble and couldn't afford to keep the location.
SO. This leaves the most likely scenario being that the owner was behind on rent, and the mall manager (who has a history of being outta control and pulling shit like this, as well as harassing asian businesses and our shop specifically) decided to illegally remove the entire kiosk about it.
Still no confirmation at all about anything, but I remembered the listing today and realized it gave some additional clues.
Also, sorry to go asking, but I'm gonna slip my ko-fi link in here because both final checks and unemployment are taking much longer than expected, and I had to move apartments very suddenly (like found out the day after losing my job kine sudden), which is burning through my savings too. The job market in my region is absolute dogshit right now and I'm partially disabled so I'm kinda freaking out. Everyone's struggling right now so if you're enjoying the story but can't donate please don't feel guilty, I also like sharing the laughs.
Tumblr Code.
If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”
that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything
I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person
must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!
Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.
always reblog tumblr identification
good god this just crossed my dash in the year of our lord 2023
I LIKE YOUR SHOELACES??? IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2024??
Let’s take it to 4 million, folks!
almost there!
TO 4 MILLION!!!!!!!!!
THE ORIGINAL SHOELACES POST?? ON MY DASH IN 2024??
shoelaces. on your dash. in 2025.
Now seen in 2026
Happy 14th birthday to I Like Your Shoelaces
"All drugs are drugs" = a surprisingly radical position that will upset people right across the political spectrum
This means:
If you draw a hard line between "drug" and "medicine" based on current legality where you live (or any other criteria) you've gone wrong somewhere,
If you think legality and/or prescription status tells you all you need about a substance's capacity to do massive harm to someone's body, mind or well-being you've gone wrong somewhere,
If you think legality and/or prescription status tells you all you need about a substance's capacity to contribute meaningfully to someone's healing, function or happiness you've gone wrong somewhere,
If you think certain substances should be excluded from informed consent (either withheld or forcibly administered) you've gone wrong somewhere.
Maybe this is a hot take but the gendered segregation of bloodsports is just as pants-on-head ridiculous as the gendered segregation of any other sport.
Like. This is a fucking game. Two boxers fighting one another in a ring are two gamers playing a game together. I cannot stress the extent to which boxing, MMA, et al are games created and pursued primarily for idle amusement. Just because the game is happening in a ring as opposed to on a pitch doesn't make it less of a game. We are Playing Toys when we glove up and clobber each other. It is For Fun. They're dangerous games, to be sure, but the danger is the chief source of amusement for the participants and the audience. The boxers wouldn't be boxing if they hated boxing.
"If we did co-ed boxing there would be Men Beating Up Women 😡" Last time I checked a fight requires at least 2 active participants unless you're just beating up on yourself alone like Edward Norton in that movie. And as I said above, I presume nobody would pursue a career in boxing if they didn't like doing the boxing.
And moreover, maybe I'm just a hashtag 90s kid but I grew up being constantly innundated with messages about how girls are just as tough as boys and can do anything boys can do. "Fight like a girl" was an inescapably popular slogan. And it was all very nice and heartwarming and inspirational. So I take serious umbrage with the notion that competing in a co-ed fight league equates to "men beating up women" because, here in the real world, the women would lay out the men just as often as the reverse, and this implicit assumption that women are by majority soft, delicate, helpless creatures simply unfit for participation in physical culture has got to be one of the least feminist things I've ever heard.
Fighting (and weightlifting) would be some of the easiest sports to convert into a co-ed model cause they already have weight classes within the gender segregated versions to keep the sports fair. It really wouldn't be that hard to just combine the two halves into one thing. And this is also what prevents the thing that everyone is so scared of happening from happening. You wouldn't get a massive mountain of a man beating up a tiny woman in co-ed boxing, because they'd be in two different weight classes. If the massive mountain of a man were to fight a woman, he'd be fighting a massive mountain of a woman, and if a the tiny woman were to fight a man, she'd be fighting a tiny man. Thats how these sports already work. (This is also why the argument against letting trans people compete in the gendered categories matching their identities falls flat, people think if you let a trans woman compete in womens boxing that she'd dominate all her opponents, when in reality she'd be in the weight category that ensures her opponents give her fair fights. But that's a different conversation)
The real reason most sports, including fighting, are gender segregated, isn't because men would automatically dominate, quite the opposite actually, it's because the men would not win every single time and would lose to women more often than one would assume. And because our patriarchal society devalues anything women are good at, sports as a whole would be devalued. And that devaluing of womens work, talents, interests, and accomplishments is the real problem that needs to be addressed

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Outdoor in sun perfec t place for president to do speech! Outdoor very warm very soft put old man on green lawn under sun. Put old man in warm sun. no problem ever in warm sun because good view and audience can see long speech. Nice podium outdoor sunny perfect place for old president can trust warm sun to give nice view to President good luck to President. friend sun.
i love learning about animals ive literally never seen or heard of before. what amazing diversity of life on this planet earth. what the hell is a japanese serow
goat dog