Sugar and Spice

absolutely enthralled by the idea that for turkeys, "investigate pretty shiny object" is a more innate instinct than "drink water to survive." Truly i may be a turkey at heart

Imagine the level of whimsy I could reach if I just had $5M in my bank account rn

hate hate hate how sites are increasingly trying to make right click saving images impossible. facebook, instagram, reddit (app), pinterest*, etc... all make you jump through hoops just to save an image. can you guys not please. how ddo i make them stop. can we get one of those EU regulations or whatever that makes them all comply, or are we going to have to wait for global socialism for that. ugh

oh look, the exact tool that would have saved me SO much time and energy trying to find images hidden in the source code 🙃

things used to be $5

Mutuals I’m doing this to you

Mutuals I’m doing this to you again

Another fun thing I do with customers - specifically parents of very small children who don’t know they’re alive yet - is directly imply I think the coffee is for the baby, not the parent. and lemme tell you, like 70% of parents eat that shit up. They immediately go along with the bit and start discussing it with their newborn child, while the baby just stares at us like 😮

a handprint made in concrete is just the image of a hand, it’s not the real thing. or, it’s the absence of a hand, more than anything, the negative space. the casing around where it should be. it’s an indent that was made from something real - that could not have existed without something real - but it’s not the real thing, it’s just trying to be. maybe it’s not even trying. you put your hand there with your mother and the concrete remembers, and the handprint doesn’t even know why it exists, it just does. if we can make copies and not-things from real things in the world, who’s the say the world couldn’t do that itself? does it even need to know why?

I don't give an amazing digital fuck

the Masters of the Universe remake makes this video relevant again which means we are in the best timeline

cats can never just lay down they have to stand there on your pancreas