Oh honey

fucked up some bird tried to steal your car like that

He’s not stealing, he’s robin

Just came home from a dinner party with the friendgroup at which several people kept saying "Ask Pedro" or "Pedro will know" and I was terrified that they were referring to an AI like Claude but no, thank fuck, they were referring to a cardboard cutout of Pedro Pascal that someone left upstairs and who has been designated a kind of patron saint status in the household.

i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street

apsopring bloo

Marriage of The Rats!

I've discovered the worst game in human history. I call it Dog Toy Or Sex Toy, who wants in

How would this even be challenging? Are there dick-shaped chew toys?

Dog toy

D-dog...toy?

World Heritage Post

The fear in the second one is like someone realizing that the Russian Roulette game is being played with Real Bullets

i think you’re lowballing the furry art amount tbh

I’m sorry for the inaccuracies, Doctor Yiff

no matter how I respond to this I don’t look good, well played. i walked right into that

Well, furry artists are typically more competent and courteous than your average doctor, so I can see that.

Did you just legitimately tell me that a person who draws wolf ass is more competent than a dude who spent 8+ years in a university to give you your lung transplant?

doctors are bullshit and furry artists perform an infinitely more valuable service to society compared to them

You will die in 7 days

You could if you weren’t a fucking coward

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[ID: a comic illustrating the above thread as if it was happening in a theater. The users are mostly shaped like their icons, pukicho is a pikachu and hokuto-ju-no-ken is a gengar. The last panel is gengar looks back where a speech bubble comes out of the crowd to say, “you could if you weren’t a fucking coward.” /end]

I can’t believe I’m actually seeing this post

Magic of tumblr,

I’ve seen this thread more than a few times. But this is the first time I’ve seen this video. So thank you for your service.

i want y'all to know this comic/video literally changed my life because now whenever i’m too scared to do a thing that i really want, i just hear “YOU COULD IF YOU WEREN’T A fUcKiNg CoWaRd!!!!” in my head in this exact voice and intonation and then i’m able to do the thing.

Oh nooo I hadn’t noticed that my cat’s automatic feeder was getting low on food so as usual she dashed off when she heard the machine start but I couldn’t hear the usual sound of her food falling into the bowl so I went to look and my poor cat was just. Sitting there. Staring at her empty food bowl. Then for a second she glanced up at me then right back to her bowl with the biggest, saddest, most bewildered eyes you could ever imagine on such a small creature. I filled her bowl and the machine right away ofc but I still feel a little guilty 😭

i’m gently cupping every woman’s face when I say this: there are things far worse than being single at any age

do not let your loneliness convince you that indifference or someone who is constantly hot + cold is better than being alone. being misunderstood or unappreciated is a loneliness of its own

Can you swap their heads ?