Girl help, Iām hyperfixating on Check Please! - As an Aussie, the only things I know about hockey are the memes. | I'm Tig, they/he, 28. | Icon from @blueberrytater I follow from @verberation
Kent Parson/Eric "Bitty" Bittle, Past Kent Parson/ Jack Zimmermann, Pre Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann
Rated M.
An Epikgester au for the @omgcpbigbang2021 by @checkdeezpucks
with amazing art by @lesbasketsjaunes
ā
"This guy might be someone Jack would have later ā but Kent would get there first, and Jack would never have that. Jack would have to settle for Kentās seconds the way heād so very clearly chosen to do with everything else."
Kent never said that he made sensible decision. When he runs into Jackās teammate on the stairs at the Hockey Frat's Epikegster, he isnāt exactly thinking of making good choices. Hooking up with the guy seems like an easy way of getting the last word with Jack - but that was without counting on Bitty himself and just how quickly Kent would forget what he set out to do.
AKA: TFW you set out for a revenge hookup, but you catch feelings instead.
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Okay. I was on my beloved AO3 and I saw something that made me do a double take. So, now I really want to knowā¦
What is your AO3 user ID?
Iām an OG user 5 digits or less
Six figures baby!
Iām in the millionsā¦
Remaining time: 4 days 7 hours
Iām so curious to see how long people have been on AO3! I know some people have been on there since beta/invite only, but I would love to see what the number is on tumblr!
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I think fanfiction as a medium is different enough from mainstream literature in the tools it offers writers that it's a shame that it's not talked about more often. And it's not me saying "fanfic is better than books xD" because that sort of mindset is a symptom of people who aren't particularly well read in either medium. I'm just speaking of like... The little things you get to do with a fanfic that you genuinely can't really do in an original story.
I had a big fanfic in a previous fandom where one of the big reveals was the involvement of a kind of infamous villain, whose presence was built up to and foreshadowed through the whole fic until his reveal without ever mentioning his name, so that the name drop would be a gut punch. It worked especially well because of who the villain was and his presence in that fandom space specifically (it's very complicated) and if it was an original story this reveal wouldn't work at all the way it was written in the fic. Because if you don't have a predisposition to think about that character and his relationship to the hero in a very specific way, then just seeing their name won't do much to you; the reveal and the recontextualisation it pushes upon you hinges on your previous knowledge of the source material.
I think it's an interesting tool fanfic authors are given. One of my favorite fanfic of all time is partially a re-imagining of its source material's canon, and something it does is introduce antagonists much earlier in the story or deepen npcs' stories. It then works to evoke a tragic irony that again wouldn't work if you didn't know the source material, and it's something the author obviously has a lot of fun with.
You could call it cheap or a crutch and I mean, yeah, sure, it is a little bit: the fanfic relies on previously established emotional bonds and stakes to achieve its goal, and in some cases it saves the author from having to 'properly' build up its stakes. But I think it's INTERESTING that it has that tool at its disposal. I think it's a fun thing to play with and I think these built in expectations and emotional bonds are especially why I find story driven aus in particular to be fascinating in the amount of ways you can play with them. You know??
"what if they fucked" WRONG. what if they ruined each other's lives irreparably. what if there was nothing left but a smoldering heap. what if everything that brought them together twisted and corroded and ripped them apart. and then they fucked.
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me as an nhl reporter in a post-game press interview: so do you agree that feeling the most secure touching each other while wearing literal armour is a metaphor for the human condition? your vulnerability in these goal celebrations is offset by the fact that you arenāt actually physically touching each other; you literally canāt touch each other, and this is the only time you try. does that fact ever make you reflect on your relationships with your teammates? would you so gleefully have held him if heād achieved a victory in his personal life, off the ice? in his home? the padding protects you in more ways than one, does it not? isnāt this the nature of human connection, played out on television screens like a soap opera? donāt you think we all watch because we want to hold our friends after their successes and console them after our losses but feel blocked by their armour? by our own?
the nhl player who just physically exerted himself for a full hour whoās still out of breath and sweating and only picked up 1/5th of what i just said: uhhhh, whā well, itās a team effort out there, we, uhh, give it 110%ā
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Thereās a liquor store near my house that seems to be run exclusively by frat boys. They lovingly curate these bags, which I browsed today while āOops I Did It Againā played through the store speakers. This is art to me, there is beauty everywhere for those with eyes to see it
Listen, Kent Parson and Ilya Rozanov would hook up the handful of times a year they play against each other without knowing that they could also be complaining to each other about being in love with boring Canadians.
Kent doesn't realize he's been flirting with Shane Hollander all All Star Game. Mostly, because he has no reason to. He hasn't found Rozanov yet, but the numbers don't lie: four hook ups in the last four games when the Aces played the Bears means Ilya is a sure thing. Kent will find him later, slip a hotel key into his front pocket and then Rozanov will come shove his cock so far up Kent's ass he'll hit the reset button on Kent's brain.
There's no reason to be flirting with Shane in all the usual All Star cliches, stealing his jersey for warm ups, making sure to grab his attention before going in for a dumb trick shot, over-performing the celly directly towards where Shane sits on the bench, all of it to bring out Shaneās subtle smile, a gentle scoff, an eye roll, luring that intense gaze into resting only on Kent.
At the beginning of the weekend they had both gotten dressed in the locker room, someone shoving a flask into everybodyās face, Shaneās jaw tensing and eyes resigned when it came around to him.
āActually, this is mine.ā Kent had said and stolen the flask out of Shaneās hand, too fast for Shane to drink or have to turn it down, be a buzzkill. The liquor burned like gasoline as he finished the flask, no leftovers, all the boys in the room hooting and hollering.
Shane had found him right before they were headed into the tunnel, bumping against him carefully, four inches and twenty pounds on him. āHey, thanks for earlier.ā
āThank me when Iāve scored.ā
āI will.ā Shane said, seriously, ābut also thanks for, yāknow. I donāt--- I donāt really like drinking. Especially when Iām going to play.ā
Kent loves drinking, everyone knows it, a Vegas party boy through and through. He has a reputation for holding his liquor when actually heās always had less than people think. āI just wanted a drink, man.ā
āOh.ā Shane said, face shuttering. āI thought-- sorry. I thought you were being nice to me.ā
Suddenly, Kent canāt breathe around the lump in his throat. āNo, you were right. I mean, I was.ā
āYou were.ā Shane tilts his head. āThen why?ā
āWhy be nice?ā
āWhy not say it?ā
āI donāt know.ā Kent pretends to fiddle with his glove. He wishes he was wearing a snapback. āIsnāt it easier for you? To not have to say it.ā To pretend it didnāt happen. To pretend you never needed help.
Shane chews on that for approximately a hundred thousand years. Kent mentally vows to never, ever do anything nice for Hollander ever again.
āThank you,ā Shane says after an interminable amount of time. āAnd fuck āeasy.āā The fullness of his gaze swallows Kent whole. Then Shane is waddling away, the inevitable awkward gait of walking on skates. Kent has only a moment to collect himself before heading down the hall.
Itās been good hooking up with Rozanov, knowing what he was in for, that he was going to get what he deserved, tossed about and put in his place by a cocky asshole.
Thereās no good reason to flirt with Shane Hollander, other than the mold for Kentās type cast and set at sixteen, all he knows how to want are intense stares from nice Canadian boys guaranteed to break his heart.
Realistically, it doesnāt matter that Kentās flirting with Shane Hollander. Even though Kent is eventually able to draw Shane out into shy pleasure from the attention, Kent gets no return interest from his blatant flirtation.
It's foolhardy to attempt to seduce Canadaās remaining untarnished golden boy in front of the ever-present a cheering crowd and bug eyed cameras. The spotlight is too familiar to be noticeable. Whatās new is the burn of liquid courage and the absence of his teammates. It gives the illusion that now is the time thatās worth to take risks.
Kent miscalculates. Shane is too much of a straight guy to realize heās being flirted with, but Ilya isnāt.
Kent isnāt actually planning on alienating Ilya, especially when Rozanov represents his only realistic chance of getting laid this weekend. Kent thought they understood each other well enough that Ilya wouldnāt get pissed at him for trying to sleep with the enemy, or whatever crazy thoughts heās having that are making him crash into Kent like itās the playoffs and not the fucking All Star Games.
At least it gets him Shane, coming over to haul him up from where heās lying flat on the ice, looking him over, tucking him under one arm while they sit on the bench between shifts.
āParser! What the fuck did you say to him?ā Shaneās close to be heard over the crowd. Kent can feel the heat of his breath over his face.
āI didnāt say shit! No idea what his fucking problem is.ā
If Rozanov is going to be like this, though, Kentās going to try and give as good as heās getting.
āI asked Shane for tips on how to beat you. You know, since all you do is play him and lose.ā
āHe tell you, Iām too good. And that you are too awful and short.ā Kent rolls his eyes. Guys have been going after his height since before he was even in the league. Kent has gotten chirped worse from Rozanov with the manās cock still inside him.
āNo, I asked him about beating Rozanov. And he said, āwho?āā
Rozanov fucking slashes him for that, even in the third period with the score tied. The Bears are going to need get the captainās head checked out when he gets home to Boston. Shane gets Kent the puck and Kent hammers it home on the power play, Shane hugging him into the boards and screaming something Kent canāt hear.
āWhat?ā
āI said, āthank you!āā
Kent is going to suck this manās dick tonight if it kills him.
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