boss monster

forgot to leave a note for my doordasher to bring a blunt weapon to get past the catacomb skeletons so congrats to whichever necromancer is about to get my banh mi i guess

so called "free thinkers" when there's a bug on the ceiling

I don't think "having sex" is important. What's important is arachnid locomotion is controlled by a system of hydraulic compression

calling in to work sick with a “weird dream”

you have to withstand it bro. you have to endure it patiently

Being unemployed allows you to access an alternate 'shadow world' beneath our own populated only by retirees

the beautiful mountains and waterfalls and animals and trees are all a distraction. they're a test. god wants you to network and build your business portfolio

Sometimes pervert shit is all we got in this dark world