*Minecraft villager noise* @cdpdoodler - Tumblr Blog

"smart appliances" fuck u i want them dumb as a brick and incidentally as sturdy and enduring

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biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

"smart appliances" fuck u i want them dumb as a brick and incidentally as sturdy and enduring

subaru-copilot

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

#project hail mary

beetroot-merchant

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss

power-handmaiden

when I was in high school I had a literature teacher who had a policy of unlimited extra credit. All you had to do was read a book by a notable author (his discretion) and have a little chat with him after school to prove that you read it. No limits, no need for variety (one month I decided I really loved Kurt Vonnegut and just read everything of his I could get my hands on).

Yes, I was tearing through books constantly, and talking to this teacher at least weekly. Because even though I always loved reading as a kid, literature was always a very weak subject for me in terms of a teaching-to-standardized-test school setting (I just do awful on "what color were the curtains" type multiple choice questions. Those details don't stick in my memory THEY JUST DON'T). But that didn't matter for this class. I could just read my way out of any bad test score. I have always had fond memories of how I "fudged" my way through that class and "abused' the extra credit policy.

I was thinking about it again today, and only just now realized that he absolutely tricked me into being well-read, while my teenage self thought I was totally getting away with something. THAT MOTHERFUCKER. I hope he's doing well.

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creekfiend

many women are excited to get old and weird, but i have great news that it's fully possible to become weird now, before you get old. just imagine the heights of weirdness you will be able to reach in fifty years if you get started now. that's what I think

kjscottwrites

consolecadet

These remind me of this drawing by Franz Kafka from the 1900s. We've been feeling this way for a long time.

smol-civet

prev, i'm sure you mean my guy Leonid Pasternak

wandirge

Experiment PRINT

#love the colors

homoeroticarson

quit getting weaker with the squeaker and learn to expect more with a grand old boar

foundonpluto

human susie :3

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amnesiaguy

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

amnesiaguy

weird as hell, thank you for asking

effemimaniac

add me to your discord server so I can do the online equivalent of arriving at a party saying hi to the people I know then standing awkwardly in the corner for the rest of the night

petxina

it’s genuinely crazy how so many heterosexual people don’t even consider being friends with their partners a priority in order to be in a relationship with them. absolutely bonkers to me but whatever

petxina

this 100% because after me and my ex broke up we kept in contact/being friends and so many ppl straight up couldn’t believe there wasn’t anything going on between us anymore. god forbid a man and a woman are friends like omg….

reallyreallyreallytrying

me and my buddies are building a silk road between our houses to make trading of spices, tea and oils easier

cipheramnesia

In my experience asphalt or gravel works better.

propriosepsis

You can only trade gravel and asphalt back and forth so many times before it loses its appeal.

paranormal-taters

"i feel besquintled", said no one ever. because that's not a word.

paranormal-taters

okay nevermind it IS a word now and this is exactly what it means.

paranormal-taters

EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT THIS NEW AND BETTER WORD

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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pangur-and-grim

alright I'm almost finished Project Hail Mary, and I have to say, I don't get why people are shipping the guy with Markiplier when he's already in a perfectly healthy queer-platonic relationship with the alien spider made of rocks

pangur-and-grim

that's insane. we need to change this

scoes

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