you know that quote "when you have a hammer everything looks like a nail" bc that's how i feel whenever i have a lysol wipe in my hand

it’s cuz you’re always on That damn toilet

sometimes I see things that are so absurdly horny that it circles back around to being sexless you know what I mean

like when I see really horny art of female characters where the sexiness is so generic -- their boobs are cartoonishly large and they have a waist the size of an atom and some vacant ahegao stare etc -- I'm just like hmmmm this is so uninteresting and kinda repulsive I think I'd be more aroused by a tin can

i know every digit of pi

i dont know what order

you always on that damn 'Untitled Document'!

GIRLS IN MY PHONE. WE CAN DO IT

#Cecil said damn this is a real head scratcher *dies*

some of you guys are so fucking 19 years old. i wish you well but god have mercy on your souls

Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it

so what youre gonna wanna do is crush the garlic and ginger instead of just slicing it ok, it releases more of those good flavors. yoshi is going to eat me and turn me into an egg now, i love you. remember everything i taught you